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Old 10-16-2012, 06:50 PM
 
14,752 posts, read 28,484,390 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by picklejuice View Post
Guess what?! The person being/open to set up usually ends up with a SO they never thought they would: opposite in personality, opposite in likes/dislikes, opposite in the political realm, and so on and so forth. Perhaps that is what your pals are counting on in your situation.

Cut 'em some slack.
I don't like things "picked out" for me. What you're implying is that someone knows what I need more than I do. In all of these cases, I listened to the "resumes" that were being suggested to me. I declined.
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Old 10-17-2012, 09:29 AM
 
317 posts, read 482,728 times
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NOPE, thats just one more notch on the bed post for me, so keep them coming, the more girls the merrier i'll be
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Old 10-17-2012, 11:04 AM
 
Location: The Jar
20,070 posts, read 14,357,487 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by robertpolyglot View Post
I don't like things "picked out" for me. What you're implying is that someone knows what I need more than I do. In all of these cases, I listened to the "resumes" that were being suggested to me. I declined.
Hmmm... Have you ever considered that perhaps they see things in you you don't see, or fail to recognize in yourself???

BTW, being closed minded is never a positive in life-- regardless of the area it's in.

You sound like a real catch! I think your 'declines' are actually bullets dodged in the case of the candidates.

You are coming across as a real winner! LOL!
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Old 10-17-2012, 11:21 AM
 
14,752 posts, read 28,484,390 times
Reputation: 8777
Quote:
Originally Posted by picklejuice View Post
Hmmm... Have you ever considered that perhaps they see things in you you don't see, or fail to recognize in yourself???

BTW, being closed minded is never a positive in life-- regardless of the area it's in.

You sound like a real catch! I think your 'declines' are actually bullets dodged in the case of the candidates.

You are coming across as a real winner! LOL!
It sounds like low female self-esteem and entitlement on your part; that is, that there's something wrong with the guy if he won't give you a shake because, after all, I've got a "you know what."

Deal breaker is I don't do "ready-made families," because I don't like children. Sorry for the repetition, but I'll give the list, which some may have already read:

One woman:
- cousin in Colombia, single mom, which would have altered my vacation plans
- sister in Spain, single mom, which would have altered my vacation plans
- sister in Calif, single mom, her own mother/sister blame her for her divorce, heavy, aggressive, has bugged me repeatedly at their family functions

Another woman:
- three times, all prospects not educated and "rough" - she is a professional and you would never know it, and has NO professional women friends. I once asked her that: "You're a professional, how come you don't know any professional women to hang around with?" The answer: she never left the trailer park Bible-thumping upbringing she came from.

And you want these broads setting you up?

Last edited by robertpolyglot; 10-17-2012 at 11:33 AM..
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Old 10-17-2012, 11:39 AM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,192 posts, read 19,697,656 times
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Of course I wouldn't dump a friend for this.

If I didn't want to be set-up, I just wouldn't do it. Period. It's not like they can make you go.

How in the world can this be complicated?
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Old 10-17-2012, 11:44 AM
 
14,752 posts, read 28,484,390 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43 View Post
Of course I wouldn't dump a friend for this.

If I didn't want to be set-up, I just wouldn't do it. Period. It's not like they can make you go.

How in the world can this be complicated?
You are correct. But if this seems to be their cause celebre in interacting with you, it becomes annoying. I have women friends who just don't do this, to anybody. It's not in their wiring, and it's easier to enjoy their company.

BTW, woman #2 in the example above, along with her father, is also pushy in the religion department.
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Old 10-17-2012, 11:59 AM
 
Location: Chicago area
14,214 posts, read 7,842,782 times
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No I always appreciated their efforts. Just because you don't have chemistry with some one doesn't mean they can't be friend quality. You may meet someone really interesting through your new friends or at least have some fun doing something you haven't experienced before.
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Old 10-17-2012, 03:56 PM
 
Location: The Jar
20,070 posts, read 14,357,487 times
Reputation: 36805
Quote:
Originally Posted by robertpolyglot View Post
It sounds like low female [HUH?!!!!!!!] self-esteem and entitlement on your part; that is, that there's something wrong with the guy if he won't give you a shake because, after all, I've got a "you know what."

Deal breaker is I don't do "ready-made families," because I don't like children. Sorry for the repetition, but I'll give the list, which some may have already read:

One woman:
- cousin in Colombia, single mom, which would have altered my vacation plans
- sister in Spain, single mom, which would have altered my vacation plans
- sister in Calif, single mom, her own mother/sister blame her for her divorce, heavy, aggressive, has bugged me repeatedly at their family functions

Another woman:
- three times, all prospects not educated and "rough" - she is a professional and you would never know it, and has NO professional women friends. I once asked her that: "You're a professional, how come you don't know any professional women to hang around with?" The answer: she never left the trailer park Bible-thumping upbringing she came from.

And you want these broads setting you up?
I know you weren't referring to the 'Pickle' on this one. Not sure what you meant here???
And these wonderful sounding 'broads' are YOUR friends?! Very telling and interesting! I assumed you were talking about male pals setting you up. ROFL!

Last edited by picklejuice; 10-17-2012 at 04:04 PM..
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Old 10-17-2012, 04:32 PM
 
15,762 posts, read 9,493,425 times
Reputation: 68290
From what I've read here, yes, I'd drop a friend who kept doing that. In your case, it sounds like some of the friends are actually the wives of friends - so that's a little different. It should be easier, really - don't accept invitations that include the wives.

I'm surprised so many people persist in trying to set you up - it's abundantly clear from how you've expressed yourself here that matchmaking is not a good match for you. Have you been as direct in person with these people as you've been here with us?

Personally, I'd say something like "I know you're just trying to help your friend but I find this sort of thing really intrusive so please take me off your list of 'available bachelors'. Permanently." People really overstep when it comes to some personal issues - especially when they think everyone should be married and everyone should have kids.
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Old 10-17-2012, 06:03 PM
 
14,752 posts, read 28,484,390 times
Reputation: 8777
Quote:
Originally Posted by toosie View Post
From what I've read here, yes, I'd drop a friend who kept doing that. In your case, it sounds like some of the friends are actually the wives of friends - so that's a little different. It should be easier, really - don't accept invitations that include the wives.

I'm surprised so many people persist in trying to set you up - it's abundantly clear from how you've expressed yourself here that matchmaking is not a good match for you. Have you been as direct in person with these people as you've been here with us?

Personally, I'd say something like "I know you're just trying to help your friend but I find this sort of thing really intrusive so please take me off your list of 'available bachelors'. Permanently." People really overstep when it comes to some personal issues - especially when they think everyone should be married and everyone should have kids.
Yes, I have been REALLY direct. I've told them what my deal breakers were the first time they tried it, and I told them NOT to continue doing this.

I have actually been very rude to "friend" #2, who is also persistent in the religion area, but I knew her directly through a common line of work. Having a common line of work did not offset the matchmaking and religious fanaticism, and ended that friendship.

Last edited by robertpolyglot; 10-17-2012 at 06:22 PM..
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