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Old 10-28-2012, 01:54 PM
 
Location: Southern California
5,407 posts, read 8,103,583 times
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Do You Have More Close Friends OR Acquaintances?

Just so I'm not retyping my situation, read the above thread I started about friendships.

I live alone & if it weren't for my boyfriend, practically every weekend could go by without me going out & doing something with someone. I'm close to my mom so I could always do something with her, but it's not the same as a friend one's own age.

It'w hard for me to make friends too & I don't see anything changing for the better anytime soon for me...unless I go out there & join classes & other acitivities, etc.
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Old 11-02-2012, 08:52 AM
 
16,025 posts, read 19,571,183 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ponchew0 View Post
People generally like me, as I'm a nice person, attractive, and smart. I used to be funnier. I'm more active than I used to be, but I still find a hard time making friends. Sometimes people do want to be my friends, I can tell, but I don't know how to make that leap and become friends. I'm sure they wouldn't mind being friends, but they're not going to put in the extra effort to being my friend unless they feel connected to me in that way, I guess. Still don't know how to make friends. It's not that I'm shy either. It's that I don't have a lot of funny things to say, and I don't watch TV or movies, so I don't have anything to contribute when they're all watching a show. I'm definitely not the person who says a lot of funny things. More like the quiet girl everyone likes but no one wants to befriend.
Making friends is a process. You don't have to do much of anything regarding a grand gesture...Just accept their invitations if you think they are nice. Life happens little moments at a time. Friendships grow over time. Just be there, be in the moment, not in your head thinking about what you should or shouldn't respond...See if things go better for you.
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Old 11-02-2012, 06:59 PM
 
665 posts, read 666,535 times
Reputation: 909
Quote:
Originally Posted by Forever Blue View Post
Do You Have More Close Friends OR Acquaintances?

Just so I'm not retyping my situation, read the above thread I started about friendships.

I live alone & if it weren't for my boyfriend, practically every weekend could go by without me going out & doing something with someone. I'm close to my mom so I could always do something with her, but it's not the same as a friend one's own age.

It'w hard for me to make friends too & I don't see anything changing for the better anytime soon for me...unless I go out there & join classes & other acitivities, etc.
I'm pretty much in the same situation, except for the boyfriend of course. The only person I ever hang out with is my mom, don't even have a single friend. I'm not really social, I don't go out or anything so I don't see my situation changing either.
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Old 11-03-2012, 05:12 PM
 
440 posts, read 1,317,926 times
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I thought about taking clases for fun at a local JC but it now cost about $45 per unit, so the cost of one class with fees parking permit and everything would be near $200. Pretty steep if you ask me and not sure it's worth it just to possibly meet new people.

Last edited by Lost Leaf; 11-03-2012 at 05:25 PM..
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Old 11-03-2012, 05:27 PM
 
Location: Kansas
19,187 posts, read 14,947,409 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Forever Blue View Post
Do You Have More Close Friends OR Acquaintances?

Just so I'm not retyping my situation, read the above thread I started about friendships.

I live alone & if it weren't for my boyfriend, practically every weekend could go by without me going out & doing something with someone. I'm close to my mom so I could always do something with her, but it's not the same as a friend one's own age.

It'w hard for me to make friends too & I don't see anything changing for the better anytime soon for me...unless I go out there & join classes & other acitivities, etc.
So, you realize the issue in that unless you go out and join activities, etc. they won't be coming to you. I might have seen this before if your mother is maybe trying to be your best friend, that usually stunts the social growth of the children.
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Old 11-07-2012, 07:11 AM
 
Location: Southern California
5,407 posts, read 8,103,583 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mn311601 View Post
I'm pretty much in the same situation, except for the boyfriend of course. The only person I ever hang out with is my mom, don't even have a single friend. I'm not really social, I don't go out or anything so I don't see my situation changing either.
I completely understand your situation. I have one pal who I've known since 2008. I wouldn't call her a close friend, but we meet up to go to lunch & shopping maybe every 5-7 mos. We email each other about a couple times a month, but hardly ever talk on the phone. She's a lot older than me, so she has grandkids & family to always keep her busy.

I recently met another friend just this Sept. She's a LOT more like me, no longer in her 20s either, but is single, no kids, lives alone, kind of a foodie, & surprisingly, an ONLY CHILD too, which is rare! I think we could make great friends. We see each other at work about 2x/month & have gone to lunch 2x since Sept, so I would like us to become better friends. I suggested that we go to an amusement park when we're off during our 2-wk Christmas vacation, which she liked the idea. That should be fun. She seems like the type of person I could do a lot of things with: Shop, go to lunch, exercise/walk, go to the movies, etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnywhereElse View Post
So, you realize the issue in that unless you go out and join activities, etc. they won't be coming to you. I might have seen this before if your mother is maybe trying to be your best friend, that usually stunts the social growth of the children.
My mom never tried to be my friend. She has been an excellent mother & her & my dad have overall been very stirct with me, so I've lived on the straight & narrow, never giving them a bit of trouble ever in my life. Her & I are just very close since I don't have friends really & I'm may parents' only child.

But yes, I think it takes some effort on a person's part to get out there & meet people. People won't always come to the person, unless maybe they have the type of job where they're in constant contact with the public OR the person goe out a lot to various places.
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Old 11-07-2012, 07:43 AM
 
196 posts, read 176,600 times
Reputation: 58
Quote:
Originally Posted by berkeleylake View Post
I understand how you feel. I would try to meet people who share the same hobbies you do or volunteer if you like doing that. You can find groups on Meetup.com depending on where you live. That might help some meeting people who share more of your interests.

Just think outside the box on meeting people, but I would definitely steer towards my own interests and go about it that way.

I like the fact you don't watch TV, I rarely do as well.

This. Great advice. Sharing a common interest, through hobby clubs/groups with other people that share an interest is a great start because you automatically have something in common and can talk about it.
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Old 11-10-2012, 04:20 PM
 
146 posts, read 263,244 times
Reputation: 183
Try to befriend people from different ethnic backgrounds. ( no offence intended towards americans )
In my opinion, these people are more open to making new friends. They are more social and accepting, and as a result, in a fairly short time you'll have tons of new friends.
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