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Old 10-31-2012, 01:20 PM
 
12,890 posts, read 15,376,233 times
Reputation: 14833

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Quote:
Originally Posted by napy666 View Post
I am not a teen I'm 25. And her and I are always having fights like this over anything I want or need. Like I told her I wanted to go to a concert even though I haven't been to one in months and right away she says
"Concerts are all you care about, why not go and look for a job?"

When I do go and look online and apply online but its never enough for her. She complains that all I do is stay home and not go out WELL YOU ALWAYS COMPLAIN WHEN I DO WANT TO GO OUT SO WHY BOTHER GOING OUT ANYMORE?
Hi napy666, no offense intended when I say that after I read your first post I figured you were about 15 or 16...You're having these disagreements (fights) with your mom because you aren't conducting yourself in an adult way (that's what I think)..it sounds like you need your moms approval even just to go out, why?..why even tell her about wanting to go to the concert? just go...why save coupons together and allow her to decide how/when they'll be used, can't you just save your own?, and use them when you want?..surprise her one morning with "breakfast sandwiches"...I think your dis-satisfaction with the way you and your mom "collide" has a lot to do with you handing over the control of your life to her...maybe she doesn't want that control, maybe she wants you to be more independent (don't ask her permission, don't ask what she thinks).....you must know that you could keep relative peace in your home with the occasional white lie..."I'm going out mom, looking for work, see you later"...then go to the concert and enjoy...Do you really need to tell her where you're going every time you step out..don't let her emotions rule you...rule yourself...goodluck with that napy666
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Old 10-31-2012, 01:35 PM
 
Location: On the corner of Grey Street
6,067 posts, read 8,335,760 times
Reputation: 11540
It's hard to live at home as an adult. You need your own space. Trust me, in the scheme of life breakfast sandwiches aren't worth fighting about. Get out there on foot and apply for things. Sometimes depending on what you're applying for making a face to face connection can make a lot of difference. Set a goal that you're going to apply for at least one job a day. You have to be proactive. I can see why your mom is annoyed at you. You're 25, you live at home, and you have no job. I'm not trying to knock you, but I'm sure your mom just wants to see you be successful on your own.
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Old 10-31-2012, 01:55 PM
 
548 posts, read 793,315 times
Reputation: 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by Granny Sue View Post
I bet you that she doesn't think that you're trying hard enough to find a job. So you look and apply online?
Do you ever go out of apply in person?

She's also probably tired of supporting you. Add up how much all those fast food meals cost, even with the coupons.

What do you contibute to the household in way of help...not finacially but physically? Can you cook? Learn to so you can help save your parents some $$.
Clean? Anyone can clean. Do the laundry, do the yard work.
At 25 you should be earning your keep if you're going to continue to live with Mommy and Daddy.

For your information we rarely ever eat out fast food anymore and the only time we buy out fast food is rare we only pay for good for groceries and stuff like that.

And I do contribute helping around the house feeding the animals, picking up after them, dusting and cleaning the house etc.
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Old 10-31-2012, 01:58 PM
 
548 posts, read 793,315 times
Reputation: 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by beth98 View Post
Agreed. The OP should consider herself lucky her mom didn't kick her butt to the curb 5 years ago.

Napy: A job will help. Of course you don't get along with your mom. You are old enough to need freedom, but she still gets a say because she is supporting you. If you are looking for retail/restaurant, then online is a terrible way to find a job. Take yourself to the mall tomorrow and go into EVERY store and apply for a job. Ask for a managers business card, and call them a week later to follow up. The day after that, go to a different mall and do the exact same thing. Repeat until you get a job. Retailers should be hiring seasonal help for the holidays now. UPS and Fedex too. You don't have to be a driver, they have customer service positions. If you aren't apply for at least 5 jobs a day, you aren't trying hard enough.

Screw doing all of that I did that before and nothing happened so I'm not bothering with it again.

BESIDES that even IF I made 1 million dollars a day and gave it all to my mom she would still complain.
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Old 10-31-2012, 02:00 PM
 
548 posts, read 793,315 times
Reputation: 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawberrykiki View Post
It's hard to live at home as an adult. You need your own space. Trust me, in the scheme of life breakfast sandwiches aren't worth fighting about. Get out there on foot and apply for things. Sometimes depending on what you're applying for making a face to face connection can make a lot of difference. Set a goal that you're going to apply for at least one job a day. You have to be proactive. I can see why your mom is annoyed at you. You're 25, you live at home, and you have no job. I'm not trying to knock you, but I'm sure your mom just wants to see you be successful on your own.
Yeah and its never going to happen all jobs of today REQUIRE THAT YOU HAVE EXPERIENCE WHETHER IT'D BE 1 TO 5 YEARS WORKING A CERTAIN THING SO I GOT 0 TO OFFER SO WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT ME?
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Old 10-31-2012, 02:10 PM
 
Location: Orlando
8,181 posts, read 16,523,438 times
Reputation: 49780
I got it. OP doesn't want to try.
Honey I flipped burgers at McD's, cleaned toilets at the Park's department, cleaned dog cages at a vet's office, did retail during Christmas, moved yards, and did a whole lot of other charming things to make money. I cleaned rooms at a hotel and worked my way up to Front Desk then to Bookkeeper that led to this job I have now.

If you're not willing to bust your hump even to try to GET a job then you get no sympathy from me.
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Old 10-31-2012, 02:11 PM
 
13,147 posts, read 20,724,362 times
Reputation: 35336
Quote:
Originally Posted by napy666 View Post
Yeah and its never going to happen all jobs of today REQUIRE THAT YOU HAVE EXPERIENCE WHETHER IT'D BE 1 TO 5 YEARS WORKING A CERTAIN THING SO I GOT 0 TO OFFER SO WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT ME?
So that's it? You are just going to let your parents continue to support you? Do you have any plans for your future?
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Old 10-31-2012, 02:30 PM
 
Location: zone 5
7,330 posts, read 13,186,888 times
Reputation: 9611
And who was going to pay for the concert tickets?? Sorry, Hon, your attitude is that of a teenager. If what you've been doing to find a job hasn't been working, then get out there and look hard,in person. That's what you'd have to do if you were on your own, and that's what you need to do even if you have your parents to live off of. Saying screw it is taking advantage of them. When you do get a job,have a good work ethic and try to make it work out. Don't live your life with the idea you have Mom and Dad to fall back on. Aspire to be an adult.
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Old 10-31-2012, 02:36 PM
 
1,009 posts, read 1,259,914 times
Reputation: 1360
Napy - you seemed to have really backed yourself into a corner here. Who's paying for the concerts etc. you do/want to attend? If you are accepting money from your parents you will remain subservient to whatever they say.
Make a plan to get yourself out of there. The holiday season is here and you should be able to find work for the next couple of months - that's beats hanging around the house waiting for approval to go out.
You're young, if you haven't already done so, try to get out and take a community college class or two and start moving toward a goal. This isn't the time to say you can't afford that. Find a way and show your parents you have a plan and hopefully your mother will ease up on you. The more you can do for yourself, the better you will feel. A little independence is better than none.
This all takes time but if you start doing something positve for yourself you should find your self image improving. I say that as you seem pretty down in the dumps in general and you need to do act in your own behalf for progress to occur.
Good luck with your effort towards an independent life.
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Old 10-31-2012, 02:46 PM
 
Location: On the corner of Grey Street
6,067 posts, read 8,335,760 times
Reputation: 11540
Everyone has given you good advice and been pretty supportive considering your crappy attitude. If you're 25 and you've never had a job you start at the bottom. Work fast food, clean hotel rooms, anything. Start at the bottom and your way up. Be a hostess or a bus person at a restaurant. Or you know, continue to sit around and feel sorry for yourself. The only one who can change your life is YOU.
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