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I guess relationships come and go and this one ended, at least from my side. Or so I believe.
I have been friends with this guy for about 10 years. A couple days ago and after intense negotiations, I was offered a very coveted position that pays extremely well (17% more than I do now). I am happy about it.
I told him and something in him changed .... he sent me a few mean emails , kind of covert but mean nonetheless.
1st email (before I got the position): "Do not get your hopes too high, you will never get it".
2nd email (when I got the position but was negotiating salary): " You will not get the money"
3rd email (When I got the money): "I am surprised"
No
"you go girl, well done" or I am happy for you or nothing, I cannot believe it. I love him deeply and cannot believe what he said to me.
He also told me not to buy a brand new house; which I will do soon anyway, with this income I can afford it.
Sorry for the rant, just incredibly sad.
If you've known him for ten years why don't you call him on it and say something like,"I can't believe you are acting this way. Aren't you happy for me? Are you jealous or what? What is going on?" See what he says.
Either that or just ignore it and chock it up to temporary jealousy. If that is the worst thing he's said in 10 years, it isn't worth taking to heart and losing a friend over.
I have a long time relationship with someone I used to date, then he dated someone for a few years and then when that ended I just suggested we keep it simple and leave the physical aspect out of it and we've been great friends ever since . He's been through a lot and sometimes when we spend a lot of time continuously together he pulls the old passive aggressive routine on me ie he'll give uninvited advise and then be mad if I don't love it or I won't take it . Then he launches into he "never should have come to visit" or something unbelievable comes out of his mouth. He'll try to twist everything around. I have learned to just ignore it.
If you've known him for ten years why don't you call him on it and say something like,"I can't believe you are acting this way. Aren't you happy for me? Are you jealous or what? What is going on?" See what he says.
Either that or just ignore it and chock it up to temporary jealousy. If that is the worst thing he's said in 10 years, it isn't worth taking to heart and losing a friend over.
I have a long time relationship with someone I used to date, then he dated someone for a few years and then when that ended I just suggested we keep it simple and leave the physical aspect out of it and we've been great friends ever since . He's been through a lot and sometimes when we spend a lot of time continuously together he pulls the old passive aggressive routine on me ie he'll give uninvited advise and then be mad if I don't love it or I won't take it . Then he launches into he "never should have come to visit" or something unbelievable comes out of his mouth. He'll try to twist everything around. I have learned to just ignore it.
What really bothers me is, honestly, the negativity. It is a huge achievement imo and the fact that i have given him so much info about my life and trusted him with my secrets , obviusly because I think highly of him, and he cannot come and say "I am happy for you"?
I feel these are his true colors.
Last week i sent him a couple of emails saying that i thought he would be happier. However, i am very intuitive and can smell jealousy a mile and I believe you fill your life with the things that are more convinient to you.
I choose positivity over negativity any day. I do not plan to cut him off, just contact him less, or at all until he gets the hint. No need for drama.
Sounds like he still has feelings for you. That's where my $5 goes.
He is married and allegedly (no judgement) is seeing someone else on the side. (That is really none of my business, but just to say he has women in his life).
Congratulations on your success!! That is fantastic! You don't need friends who aren't happy for you when something good happens. He sounds like a jerk and I know you said you weren't being judgmental, but I don't really like cheaters. I think you're better off without him in your life. He doesn't sound like a good friend.
He is married and allegedly (no judgement) is seeing someone else on the side. (That is really none of my business, but just to say he has women in his life).
Well, if he's married and still seeing someone on the side, that shows you how seriously it matters to him whether or not there are women in his life...
Well, if he's married and still seeing someone on the side, that shows you how seriously it matters to him whether or not there are women in his life...
To be honest, his infidelity has nothing to do with our friendship. That is his business. We dont have a romantic relationship so i do not care about that.
He is married and allegedly (no judgement) is seeing someone else on the side. (That is really none of my business, but just to say he has women in his life).
And he is passing judgment on you. I would have trouble being friends w/ someone who was doing what you say he is doing. I could never maintain a friendship w/ someone I had no respect for...And I would have no respect for what he is doing, or him for doing it.
And he is passing judgment on you. I would have trouble being friends w/ someone who was doing what you say he is doing. I could never maintain a friendship w/ someone I had no respect for...And I would have no respect for what he is doing, or him for doing it.
I don't know the extent of that relationship or if it is real or not. I cant pass judgement on something i do not know really.
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