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Old 03-17-2013, 04:12 PM
 
Location: State of Being
35,885 posts, read 67,004,073 times
Reputation: 22370

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If you don't like it, tell the paremts you are uncomfortable with it and please stop telling the child to address you that way.

I don't find it odd that you prefer not to have that title, for whatever reasons. Some folks don't like being adressed as grandma or grandpa, either.

Just tell them. If they try to belittle you or demand reasons, don't discuss it. Simply keep saying that you expect them to respect your wishes. You are entitled to be addressed as you wish.
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:04 PM
 
10,366 posts, read 8,359,306 times
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My grandmother was an aunt the minute she was born, as she was the youngest of a very large family. Age is irrelevant. No, her older nieces and nephews didn't call her "Aunt First-name", since they were older than she was or were her age-peers - but her great nieces and nephews certainly called her "Aunt First-name", as it was more age-appropriate. She became a great aunt around the age of twenty.

Like "Aunt", "Uncle" is a term of respect and cordiality, and it has no bearing on marital status or age. As for the claim that it will lead to confusion for later generations trying to figure out their family tree, that's a bit far-fetched. It also places future remote possibilities well-ahead of present-day realities.

Technically, you are this child's step-uncle. A child who is a member of a family such as you describe has already suffered a number of upheavals, due to parents' divorces and remarriages. Encouraging extended family stability and closeness by the use of terms like "aunt", "uncle", and "cousin" preceding the names of adult relatives - and step-relatives, and relatives by marriage - is reassuring to such a child, and a very good thing.

I agree, think of the child, not yourself. You should be flattered, not upset, that you have a new niece or nephew (not a "it"!) who wants to have a warm relationship with you and whose parents are encouraging this.
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:15 PM
 
Location: Cushing OK
14,547 posts, read 17,469,879 times
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My dad was the youngest of eleven. He was born an uncle. Being an uncle doesn't denote age at all.

I'd say talk to the parents. If they are doing it out of respect, then take it as such and accept it. At 29 there are a LOT of uncles. And the kid is related but through marriage.

They could be using the overly generalized 'cousin'....

I am still 'Aunt' to my ex's siblings kids and its fine.

And a child calling an adult by the first name is not quite right.
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:25 PM
 
1,066 posts, read 1,111,292 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EyeMovement View Post
A sibling recently was married and the person he is married to has a kid and my sibling is teaching this kid to call me uncle, but I'm not related to this kid in any way. This is the reason I don't want to be called uncle by this kid. It's like they are trying to make me an uncle without even being one. I'm 28 and if I was the real uncle it would be strange, I wouldn't like being one, but I can't complain about being called that when that happens. How do I tell this kid not to call me this? It's very annoying.
What would the kid do if you were calling him "little ****"?

Tell his parents?

Since this is such a big deal I suggest you do what a kid would have the sense to do - tell his parents.
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:38 PM
 
18,278 posts, read 23,403,969 times
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someone did this to me also, with their kid, i was in my 20's, sounded weird to me, but its actually quite a compliment

most of the time, the kid wont call you uncle anyways, so dont sweat it- its a term of endearment by the parents,

if you tell the parents you think its awkward, or you dont like it - they may take it the wrong way

i wouldnt do it...buck up, no big deal, its a compliment....
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:47 PM
 
Location: a primitive state
9,840 posts, read 20,083,646 times
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Technically, you are his uncle. It counts, even if it is by marriage. So don't be a nincompoop. Family is as family does.
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:52 PM
 
14,396 posts, read 17,258,501 times
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Say uncle say uncle!
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:54 PM
 
Location: Pacific NW
6,415 posts, read 10,352,654 times
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Often times, "aunt" or "uncle" is used as an honorific title, even if there's not blood relation.

Such a shame when people can't appreciate the honor in that.
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Old 03-17-2013, 07:01 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,628 posts, read 44,069,883 times
Reputation: 24962
Your a step Uncle. And grow up. Kids love cool older people. For gawd sake try to be one.
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Old 03-17-2013, 07:34 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
77,935 posts, read 69,884,727 times
Reputation: 75699
Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie View Post
Technically, you are his uncle. It counts, even if it is by marriage. So don't be a nincompoop. Family is as family does.
This^^.
Much ado about nothing, OP.
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