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Old 03-19-2013, 09:00 AM
 
Location: "Daytonnati"
4,245 posts, read 5,971,309 times
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Here's an odd one.

How do you all feel about gays and lesbians as friends?

I'm gay and personally I am very wary or on-gaurd around straight people in work and social situations. I don't think I could have them as friends, not because I'm hostile, just because it's sort of awkward.

My partner didn't seem to have this problem. He had a lot of "work friends" (who we saw socially after work) and this didnt seem to interfere (he was more ...maybe more comfortable around people and also with being gay).

Have you all had any experience with lesbians or gays as freinds (not family members or co-workers)?
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:10 AM
 
Location: Orlando
8,181 posts, read 16,524,955 times
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I have both gay and lesbian work and home friends.

We've had a few hic-ups over the years but all in all our friendship was more important than our differences.

I guess because I don't sleep with my friends their sexuality isn't an issue.
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:38 AM
 
Location: Las Flores, Orange County, CA
26,346 posts, read 82,855,163 times
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I like gay guys. They don't have the macho challenging personality a lot of guys do.

When I rented out rooms of my house years ago, I rented to women for the same reason. Fewer challenges. I would have also rented to gay guys. However, there are risks renting to hetero guys due to guy-guy challenges.

By the way, I am a flaming hetero.
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:41 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
22,491 posts, read 24,050,026 times
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I'm straight, and I guess I am a stereotype in that I do have several gay male friends. It's never been awkward, and I'm friends with them for the same reasons that I'm friends with anyone else--they're smart, fun, interesting people. Who they sleep with is irrelevant.
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:43 AM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
3,881 posts, read 7,292,263 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dayton Sux View Post
Have you all had any experience with lesbians or gays as freinds (not family members or co-workers)?
Yes. In fact, many of my friends has some gay friend somewhere. My husband also has gay friends and we should be attending their wedding next year.

What's the issue?
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:48 AM
 
Location: southwestern PA
20,419 posts, read 37,525,641 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Granny Sue View Post
I have both gay and lesbian work and home friends.
Same here.
Our sex lives do not factor into our friendships.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:33 AM
 
Location: Southern New Hampshire
7,204 posts, read 12,604,824 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Crabcakes View Post
What's the issue?
^^^This. I can't figure out what the issue would be either unless the straight person is some fundie who believes all gays are going to he**. But then, if I were gay, I could not be friends with someone that stupid, so it would work out.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:36 AM
 
Location: San Marcos, TX
2,572 posts, read 6,554,736 times
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I am bisexual, I am female, and I am married to a woman (2nd wedding anniversary today, 10 years together now! ... )

I am actually amused when people suggest that we should have lesbian friends just because we are a same sex couple (and it happens). I don't get the logic there. I choose my friends based on what we have in common, what kind of person they are, how they treat others. We know a few lesbian couples as acquaintances but there is nothing else we have in common with them aside from the fact that we all sleep with women.

Incidentally, one of my worst experiences ever with a friend betraying me in a very awful way was related to a lesbian friend we had for years.

My wife is very much butch and her friends seem to be straight guys most often. My friends are the same friends I've had for years, mostly straight women. I have had some gay guy friends in the past and got along well with them but not to the point of developing lasting friendships, mainly because they were younger guys and still very much into partying and clubs which I am kind of over. I will say that I would enjoy a friendship with a gay guy if I met someone who was closer to my age and so forth but I am not out there trying to meet someone. Gay, straight, or bi, if it happens it happens, if it doesn't then it doesn't.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:42 AM
 
Location: NoVa
18,434 posts, read 29,426,087 times
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I have discussed this with a few friends and we are in total agreement that if the roles were reversed, you would be considered as being discriminating against gays.

I am a straight woman and I have gay friends and I do not think of it as an issue.

Do you think they will judge you over your sexual choices?
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Old 03-19-2013, 11:03 AM
 
1,516 posts, read 1,842,413 times
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Always have had gay friends. When I was growing up in Hawaii, my mom's best friends were two gay guys. She would call John every day to gossip and we frequently got together. It was never a big deal and I didn't think anything of it. They were active members or our community and everyone accepted them....this was in the 70s. Had a number of other gay couples living in our area as well.

Had gay friends throughout college (a military college) and throughout the Army. Quite a few of my tennis teammates were gay.

So yes, for me, not really an issue at all. In fact, due to time and distance, have lost contact with many of my old friends which is sad. Some of my gay friends were the best friends I had.
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