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Old 03-20-2013, 07:56 AM
 
361 posts, read 632,342 times
Reputation: 508

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Your mom yells at you because she is frustrated. And she has a vision of how she wants your life to be.

When something gets in the way of that vision, or her idea of perfect for you, she gets upset.

Every story has two sides and I am sure this is not a one-way street. I am sure you have done some things that should be called to your attention. Maybe yelling is not the way to do it, but who knows. I have seen plenty of kids who try to aggravate their parents.

But as far as her yelling, she is mostly venting and you are convenient or close. Maybe her life has not gone the way she ways. Maybe she is unhappy, in life or in her marriage or with her kids. Maybe she does not want you to make the mistakes she did, or for you to end up like her. Who knows.

When I yelled at my kids, it was usually because I was frustrated with something else.

But a teen aged girl and a mom? Wow, I always tried to stay away from that one.

 
Old 03-20-2013, 11:29 AM
 
Location: Colorado
4,308 posts, read 11,801,772 times
Reputation: 4425
So basically you came here for advice, people have tried giving it to you and you've discounted everything that people have suggested. Why did you come here again?

All you do is complain and wonder why life isn't turning out your way. Well, here's a newsflash: YOU have to do something about it. Life doesn't just fall into your lap. Maybe you're fed up, frustrated, even depressed, but you won't do anything to help yourself. You won't go to school or take any classes (eg; Creative Writing), you won't get a job (eg; proof-reading or data entry), you won't get your license (so you failed 20 times, try again!), you won't move out, you won't talk with a counselor - what exactly ARE you doing other than giving up?

I've been clinically depressed several times in the past 20 years and yes, it's horrible and difficult and it feels like there is no way out and nothing will work for you and nobody understands how you feel, but that's only true if you let it be. You're obviously not stupid or incapable - you need to take that innate ability and turn it into something positive.
 
Old 03-20-2013, 11:44 AM
 
548 posts, read 794,758 times
Reputation: 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by chilaili View Post
So basically you came here for advice, people have tried giving it to you and you've discounted everything that people have suggested. Why did you come here again?

All you do is complain and wonder why life isn't turning out your way. Well, here's a newsflash: YOU have to do something about it. Life doesn't just fall into your lap. Maybe you're fed up, frustrated, even depressed, but you won't do anything to help yourself. You won't go to school or take any classes (eg; Creative Writing), you won't get a job (eg; proof-reading or data entry), you won't get your license (so you failed 20 times, try again!), you won't move out, you won't talk with a counselor - what exactly ARE you doing other than giving up?

I've been clinically depressed several times in the past 20 years and yes, it's horrible and difficult and it feels like there is no way out and nothing will work for you and nobody understands how you feel, but that's only true if you let it be. You're obviously not stupid or incapable - you need to take that innate ability and turn it into something positive.
I'm done with thinking positive and all that crap. I have tried time and time again. I am done.
 
Old 03-20-2013, 11:48 AM
 
Location: Bronx, New York
2,141 posts, read 2,567,779 times
Reputation: 3182
You keep fighting with your mom because she is sick of housing, feeding, and clothing a grown-a** woman who is likely disrespectful and self-entitled.

Like gee Ma...I'm only 25...a kid!!!!

Maybe your parents want to have sex without locking the door again sometime before they die!

Maybe they would enjoy having the extra $$$ you suck up to go and do something for themselves. You know enjoy life before they need the nursing home?

Last edited by Jasper03; 03-20-2013 at 12:11 PM..
 
Old 03-20-2013, 12:00 PM
 
Location: NoVa
18,433 posts, read 29,481,395 times
Reputation: 19625
Quote:
Originally Posted by napy666 View Post
I'm done with thinking positive and all that crap. I have tried time and time again. I am done.
Then be done and quite coming on here complaining. My son is nineteen and does not have his license yet, but he is working on that. He has not wanted it up until now. He is in his second semester of college and doing well.

If he wants to get somewhere, he gets on his bike and he goes. He lives in a very rural area.

He has drive and ambition. He used to pretty much be a loner and stick to himself and that worried me. Now that he is in college he has branched out a little and I am happy for him.

At 25 I had already been married, had 2 kids, lost my father, and would lose my mother very shortly.

You do not ever know what you have until it is gone, so begin to treat yourself as well as your parents with some respect and dignity.

Do something with yourself.
 
Old 03-20-2013, 12:03 PM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
5,104 posts, read 5,390,118 times
Reputation: 12612
Quote:
Originally Posted by napy666 View Post
Herself and my dad told me they would buy me a car, pay for my gas, and insurance IF I GOT MY LICENSE, I GAVE UP on that issue.
This is what parents tell 16 year olds. Once you're 18 (much less 25!), obtaining and keeping these things are your responsbility.

The reason why you're not getting along is because you're a grown woman mooching off your parents. Other than filling out applications, are you putting any real effort into fnding a job that comes with a paycheck? You could work full-time somewhere (anywhere!), and still write for the magazines.
 
Old 03-20-2013, 12:06 PM
 
819 posts, read 1,363,096 times
Reputation: 1405
I don't know how long you've been mooching off your parents, but it's time to do something and move along! I'm sure they will appreciate it. Do you help with the cooking, cleaning, etc.?

I will tell you a little story about my son who quit school in the 11th grade. After a couple of days of me and my husband getting up to go to work and his sorry butt laid up in the bed, I told him that there was no way that his daddy and I were going to get up and go to work and he stay home and lay around. He had to get a JOB or make other arrangements for his life style. Well, after a couple of days he moved in with a friend and his mother. After about 2 weeks she called demanding money for his food, etc. Told her I did not remember me asking her to take him in and that she was an idiot for letting two 16/17 year old kids lay around all day. They needed to get out and get to work. But, I did tell her if my son was hungry I'd go and get him a loaf of bread and a jar of peanut butter. There was food. if he needed clothes, he could meet me at Penny's Outlet and I'd buy him what he needed. He grew up very fast. Had some minimum wage jobs, then got some smarts, took his GED, and started college. Took him a while in between having fun, but he has a great job, a college graduate, and is an awesome child/man!

You can do the same thing. Start small and make progress when and where you can. Unless you have some kind of mental challenge that prevents you from working.
 
Old 03-20-2013, 12:24 PM
 
2,890 posts, read 5,388,399 times
Reputation: 4611
I got a car when I bought myself one. It had nothing to do with who thought I "deserved" it. I was 22.
 
Old 03-20-2013, 12:58 PM
 
Location: On the corner of Grey Street
6,071 posts, read 8,365,038 times
Reputation: 11554
If your bad attitude comes across so strongly over the INTERNET, then I can't even begin to imagine how you come across to potential employers. No wonder they don't call you back. People want to hire someone who is professional and positive. I've had a few people willing to give me a chance on no experience because I was polite, dressed well, and demonstrated eagerness to learn. I doubt you're doing any of those things. I wouldn't hire you to wipe my dog's butt honestly. If you were my daughter I'd be sick of supporting you and kick you out. By 25 years old you should be doing something, anything with your life.
 
Old 03-20-2013, 05:06 PM
 
13,677 posts, read 13,583,473 times
Reputation: 39892
So were you diagnosed with a personality disorder or what? What's your excuse for being 25 and not having a license or a job?
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