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Old 03-25-2013, 09:19 PM
 
1,168 posts, read 2,401,550 times
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I hate it when siblings spring crap like this, there is no way in the world you should be on the hook for a full share of your mothers surgery. For Pete's sake- your sister should be ashamed of herself. If anything you should all pay a PERCENTAGE according to your income. The ones earning more pay more and the others a reduced percentage. OP you better nip this crap in the bud right now or all kinds of similar things will be coming down the pike.
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Old 03-25-2013, 09:33 PM
 
13,161 posts, read 20,783,837 times
Reputation: 35417
Don't let your siblings bully you. You seem to be doing well with a limited budget, and I'm sure your mother wouldn't want to throw your finances into a tizzy. Let your siblings give your mother whatever they want towards her surgery.
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Old 03-25-2013, 09:36 PM
 
3,257 posts, read 4,476,836 times
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So where did the $450 come from? Like previous poster Cindiana said, $1,800 divided by 5 is $360 each. That would be a lot easier to pay for. I do think you have to pitch in, too bad you were not consulted.
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Old 03-25-2013, 09:44 PM
 
Location: Dallas
99 posts, read 146,501 times
Reputation: 71
I'm not sure where it came from. That is just what my sister told me we all had to put in. I should also mention, she's not even putting anything in herself because she doesn't work. Her husband would be putting in her share, and all my other siblings are married and have double incomes as well...
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Old 03-25-2013, 09:50 PM
 
112 posts, read 245,722 times
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I am also the youngest of five. When it came to chipping in my sibs always paid my entire share or helped me out. I am the youngest by alot of years so I was never in the same financial situation as them. And they got that. I had more time than money so frequently instead of paying my 1/5 I made it up by babysitting for my sibs or cleaning or what ever.
Maybe you could suggest a bartering situation with your sisters and brothers.
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Old 03-25-2013, 10:21 PM
 
7,385 posts, read 13,229,957 times
Reputation: 8989
Quote:
Originally Posted by windynostalgia View Post
I'm not sure where it came from. That is just what my sister told me we all had to put in. I should also mention, she's not even putting anything in herself because she doesn't work. Her husband would be putting in her share, and all my other siblings are married and have double incomes as well...
This sort of thing actually happened with my husband's family. Let me ask you this... Does your mother know about this particular arrangement? Because with my husband's family, you had one sibling rounding up the others basically demanding money to "help Mom"... only thing was, the money never actually got to the Mom and she didn't even know about the deal. Big fiasco.
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Old 03-25-2013, 10:31 PM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
21,856 posts, read 14,364,134 times
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I'm with most of the other posters on this. The other sibs are established and have better incomes. They shouldn't just spring this on you because your income and needs are different. I don't understand why the extra amount is required either.

I do think you should explain--again--that you can't afford this expense now. What if some awful thing did come up and you needed to contribute or get yourself out of a jam? You have to take care of yourself in this. No one else will.

I also like the idea of you giving some of your time with your mom's recovery.

Good luck in this.
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Old 03-25-2013, 10:38 PM
 
2,681 posts, read 6,264,574 times
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Default keep it short and sweet...

ask the other four to put up your share and you will repay them all as you can.
Koale
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:19 PM
 
Location: Salinas, CA
15,024 posts, read 4,798,253 times
Reputation: 8076
Quote:
Originally Posted by windynostalgia View Post
So, my mom has recently found out she has to have surgery to remove something from her throat that is causing her discomfort. It's not serious (as told to us by her doctor) the only thing is that it causes some discomfort for her (a sort of "tickling" in her throat that she finds irritating). She was scheduled to get it done this Thursday, but upon finding out she would be required to pay $1,800 out of pocket, she decided to postpone until she could save up the money. The doctor told us that this was completely okay and she could wait however long she wanted, because it wasn't an urgent surgery.

However, now my sister (I'm one of 5) has demanded that we all should cough up $450 each to cover my mom's expenses. This is so inconvenient for me because I have an out of state trip that I've had planned since January coming up in a week, and because $450 is about 2/3 or my two weeks pay. (I currently work at a big box store since I'm planning on attending school again and this place is very flexible with schedules.) This wouldn't be so bad except that my sister has demanded we all have this money within two days. This is all fine and dandy for my siblings, because they are alot older than I, have careers and make a good amount of money. $450 out of the blue is nothing to them.. but to me, it is a very sudden shock.

I have also just now began to establish my savings, because something always comes up (had to buy a car, constantly pitching in for "let's get mom and dad this", paying my bills and rent to my parents whom I still live with, etc etc) and this would eat up so much and leave me nearly at ground 0 once again

Is it wrong for me to feel a bit angry that they have just suddenly sprung this on me and demand that I comply because my mom's health should come first? I love my mom and I wish I could do this for her, and I probably will because otherwise everyone will make me out to be the terrible black sheep (as usual) but I can't help but feel it is a bit unfair. It seems as if no one is taking my situation into considering before just blind sighting me with this and demanding I "make it work somehow."
Maybe they can cover your $450 for now and you can pay them sometime in the next six weeks or so. Two days notice to pay $450 is a little inconsiderate IMO. It can't hurt to ask.
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Old 03-26-2013, 12:10 AM
 
Location: Lexington, Kentucky
6,982 posts, read 3,995,499 times
Reputation: 12981
This isn't an urgent surgery - maybe you all should just let your Mom save up and pay for it herself. I could understand doing it, if it were an urgent matter of life or death, etc.
That's a lot of money at your age, don't let your siblings bully you into this.
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