Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,606 posts, read 55,891,938 times
Reputation: 11862
Advertisements
I know a few people, in fact I have one friend in real life, who I wouldn't say is a very good influence on me. I don't dislike him personally, but every time I'm with him a just feel a little 'dirty.' I actually don't see him anymore, she doesn't seem to care for our friendship anyway so maybe it's no big loss (he sort of ignores me). We used to hang out often, he'd always make crude jokes, CONSTANTLY talk about sex, objectify women, was dishonest and unprincipled (e.g. not paying rent) - I don't want to sound like I'm bashing him, I'm not perfect myself, but I felt most of our conversation was somehow quite lewd, or as it was making fun of people (even in a joking manner). My family said that they thought he was using me too, although I'm still not sure about that.
I did enjoy having company, but the longer it went on I realised I didn't really want that any more. But I just didn't like the fact I began to be more dirty-minded (of course there's normal level, and there's being obsessive about it) than I would be. He seems to often have tumultuous relationships with family and friends. But yeah maybe that's why he doesn't seem to value the friendship anyway...I mean I really did feel we were friends, and we could joke around and stuff, but I often tired of it.
I have an online friend who sometimes irritates/bores me too...I don't want to break the friendship, of course, but he constantly talks about the same old things, asking if I've got laid, talking about celebrities.etc. Is it snobby of me to want to reduce the amount of talking I do with him because it annoys me? I annoy him occasionally too for other reasons, but usually we enjoy talking to each other.
I don't think it makes you a snob. They might THINK of you as a snob, but it doesn't make you a snob. I guess it all boils down to whether or not you're going to be true to yourself and stand up for yourself, or whether or not you'd rather defer to your friend.
Life is too short to bother with people who make us miserable. This is not snobbery, to me it's common sense.
There are people who detract from your life and people who add to your life. No one is perfect and each of us has out little quirks, personality traits, etc.
Look at it as a balance sheet. When the negatives continually out weight the positives, then it's time to cut the relationship loose. And there is no need for you to explain it to anyone or have guilt over it.
It's not snobbish to maintain a certain standard of behavior from people you choose to befriend. I wouldn't want to hang out with anyone who is constantly crude or who thinks it's not a big deal to rip off other people.
Not at all; I've avoided bad company my entire life, & it's paid off.
I know what makes me uncomfortable....people who habitually lie, steal, gossip, cheat, are sleazy & are addicted to drama make me cringe, & I run in the opposite direction.
So I've let go of more than a few relationships. And it doesn't phase me.
My philosophy is that when you hang out w/ people, they're either going to build you up & inspire you to be a better person or they're gonna bring you down to their level.
A select few in my life have inspired me & motivated me to achieve excellence.
They are the type I absolutely respect & enjoy being with.
I have a friend who was considering moving to a trailer park. I advised against it. Just too much drama. He can afford to live in a nice apartment.
There is nothing wrong with trailer parks. Or people who live in them. I just think if you don't have to live in one, it is probably a good decision. Not being a snob. BTW, I goggled sex offenders in our small town, a bunch of them live in that trailer park. Yes, they served their time, yes, maybe some of them are labeled this by some fluke, whatever....but maybe choosing not to live in this area is a wise choice.
How about keeping the friendship and setting a good example by just discouraging bad behavior. Your friend may not be aware that his behavior is annoying. Just dumping someone without honest communication is unkind.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
