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Old 04-19-2013, 08:17 AM
 
13,176 posts, read 11,795,353 times
Reputation: 7560
Default Why are Human Beings so Mean

I'm interested to see where this goes....
I've been a member of City Data for quite a few years....
what I've seen for the past few years, are a whole lot of angry, really disturbed people on the forums...
I mean, they disagree with you, then come in and personally attack someone.

Now I'm pretty darned thick skinned, and don't care what they think of me, however
there are a whole lot of people out there, who they manage to intimidate, and chase away.

I don't get the fact that there are so many people out there, that if you disagree with them, (heaven forbid) that they get all nasty and insulting....?

It frightens me, b/c they are very angry people, and the way they talk to strangers, well, I really do feel sorry for they're kids, b/c they will grow up to be exactly like that to....
My point is, if you have privy to any of these people here at CD, don't let they bully you away....
You do have a right to your opinion...
you do have a right to participate in threads and all subjects...
You do have a right to your beliefs and who you are
What I'm saying is, ignore the bullies and just post
I believe their sole purpose is to shut you up, b/c they don't like what you have to say.
Well, don't allow them to do that, post your beliefs, and don't run away....
They cannot hurt you...

Sheesh, I just don't believe how down right nasty some people can be...I'm not kidding, it is a shock...
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:27 AM
 
Location: Southern New Jersey US of A
2,639 posts, read 1,096,869 times
Reputation: 1759
Go to the Politics forum you'll "really love it there".

People behind a computer...................

There's plenty of frustration out there.

There's plenty of "burned" people.

There's plenty of double standards.

etc, etc, etc,.........

Yes people should treat others like they'd want to be treated imo.
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:30 AM
 
13,176 posts, read 11,795,353 times
Reputation: 7560
Quote:
Originally Posted by lol-its-good4U View Post
Go to the Politics forum you'll "really love it there".

ohhhh, I've been....it just seems over the past few years, there are people posting here that shouldn't be allowed to do so, b/c instead of discussing the issue, and listening to the opinions of others, they really bully them, if someone has a different way of thinking...
I was not raised to believe it was nice to talk to people like that, and it scares me as to where our culture is going?
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:36 AM
 
Location: Southern New Jersey US of A
2,639 posts, read 1,096,869 times
Reputation: 1759
Quote:
Originally Posted by cremebrulee View Post
ohhhh, I've been....it just seems over the past few years, there are people posting here that shouldn't be allowed to do so, b/c instead of discussing the issue, and listening to the opinions of others, they really bully them, if someone has a different way of thinking...
I was not raised to believe it was nice to talk to people like that, and it scares me as to where our culture is going?

Generally speaking which I don't mean everyone: the younger the generation, the more watered down the morals, values and ethics (if they even exist with them) are with them and that anything goes on a whim right or wrong.

Hang onto the good memories of the past I say as to expect at least the same afterwards might be asking for too much sadly.

GOD Bless!
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:38 AM
 
4,316 posts, read 1,935,038 times
Reputation: 4600
I think it's because of a variety of reasons. First off, it's an anonymous forum and they can be. I remember reading about some experiment way back (maybe 1960s or 70s) where, when people remained anonymous they were able to physically hurt others much easier than if they were face-to-face.

Along with that, I think some people don't really see the other people online as "real." I've seen it before in jargon and buried in paragraphs whenever they talk about online vs. "real life." etc. As if the people online somehow weren't "real."

And then there are the people who are just trying to be noticed for whatever reason.
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:38 AM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
44,406 posts, read 55,024,137 times
Reputation: 37223
Quote:
Originally Posted by cremebrulee View Post
I'm interested to see where this goes....
I've been a member of City Data for quite a few years....
what I've seen for the past few years, are a whole lot of angry, really disturbed people on the forums...
I mean, they disagree with you, then come in and personally attack someone.

Now I'm pretty darned thick skinned, and don't care what they think of me, however
there are a whole lot of people out there, who they manage to intimidate, and chase away.

I don't get the fact that there are so many people out there, that if you disagree with them, (heaven forbid) that they get all nasty and insulting....?

It frightens me, b/c they are very angry people, and the way they talk to strangers, well, I really do feel sorry for they're kids, b/c they will grow up to be exactly like that to....
My point is, if you have privy to any of these people here at CD, don't let they bully you away....
You do have a right to your opinion...
you do have a right to participate in threads and all subjects...
You do have a right to your beliefs and who you are
What I'm saying is, ignore the bullies and just post
I believe their sole purpose is to shut you up, b/c they don't like what you have to say.
Well, don't allow them to do that, post your beliefs, and don't run away....
They cannot hurt you...

Sheesh, I just don't believe how down right nasty some people can be...I'm not kidding, it is a shock...
Can I ask which forum you were on when this happened my friend?

Some of them are so filled with horrible, angry people

I do two things...

first, I avoid the places I know the most angry will be when possible (politics!) so as not to let the negativity in more than necessary and secondly I try to remember that anger and it's ugly off-shoots are really all just a symptom of fear and the powerlessness it causes.

In relationships and in relation to one another as human beings we often experience fear -

Fear of rejection - rejection of who we are.

That fear strikes at the core of our being and can cause us to act out in ways that don't always serve us, or the people around us, well.

I am sorry you were attacked and treated so badly. You didn't deserve it - I know that in the bottom of my heart.

YOU are a kind gentle soul who always works hard to be helpful. I also know due to your own broken heart you are a very compassionate caring person.

Don't let what happened get to you anymore than it already has - don't take it in and let it live in you!

I am wishing you peace, always
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:48 AM
 
Location: Southern New Jersey US of A
2,639 posts, read 1,096,869 times
Reputation: 1759
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Can I ask which forum you were on when this happened my friend?

Some of them are so filled with horrible, angry people

I do two things...

first, I avoid the places I know the most angry will be when possible (politics!) so as not to let the negativity in more than necessary and secondly I try to remember that anger and it's ugly off-shoots are really all just a symptom of fear and the powerlessness it causes.

In relationships and in relation to one another as human beings we often experience fear -

Fear of rejection - rejection of who we are.

That fear strikes at the core of our being and can cause us to act out in ways that don't always serve us, or the people around us, well.

I am sorry you were attacked and treated so badly. You didn't deserve it - I know that in the bottom of my heart.

YOU are a kind gentle soul who always works hard to be helpful. I also know due to your own broken heart you are a very compassionate caring person.

Don't let what happened get to you anymore than it already has - don't take it in and let it live in you!

I am wishing you peace, always
Yes she is a sweetie. She and even I read the type posts she references and it's sad that there's cruelty posted. One can disagree without resorting to name calling like what happens in CD. Especially posts in which is a female/male or male/female discussion pertaining to relationships, people getting hurt/burned, double standards, dating requirements and so on.
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:57 AM
 
6,074 posts, read 3,450,217 times
Reputation: 13986
Well, you don't have to filter yourself online when you're faceless with no identifiers. You're not exactly going to see people at their best when they don't have to make eye contact or humanize their "opponents."

The way people talk on the Internet is not really indicative of anything but the fact that some people have a little suppressed rage, which is nothing new.

As for this all being some indicator of declining morals and courtesy, personally, while I've found that people are less traditionally courteous face-to-face, they're actually in general a lot NICER than people who lived before. My father grew up in a time where things descended into fistfights at the drop of a hat and EVERYONE THOUGHT IT WAS NORMAL; slurs, poor treatment and open disdain for people of different nationalities, races, religions, genders and sexual orientations were all STANDARD BEHAVIOR; sexual assault and molestation were blamed on the victim and swept under the rug as shameful things; domestic violence was perfectly acceptable as long as you kept it private; and you could beat and torture your livestock and everyone was ok with it, if they didn't find it downright entertaining. There are still problems in society - they're just different problems than came before. And personally, I prefer today's problems and dealing with today's society.

My father is OLD, much older than any of my friends' fathers. I grew up hanging out with him and men who were even older than him. Many of those men were very good people whom I viewed as mentors, but many of them had attitudes that were acceptable 50 years ago, but which I just found utterly depraved. People need to stop clutching their pearls over this idea that we're in some sort of social decline. We're not - we just have different problems than they did 50 years ago.
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Old 04-19-2013, 09:04 AM
 
Location: Southern New Jersey US of A
2,639 posts, read 1,096,869 times
Reputation: 1759
Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
Well, you don't have to filter yourself online when you're faceless with no identifiers. You're not exactly going to see people at their best when they don't have to make eye contact or humanize their "opponents."

The way people talk on the Internet is not really indicative of anything but the fact that some people have a little suppressed rage, which is nothing new.

As for this all being some indicator of declining morals and courtesy, personally, while I've found that people are less traditionally courteous face-to-face, they're actually in general a lot NICER than people who lived before. My father grew up in a time where things descended into fistfights at the drop of a hat and EVERYONE THOUGHT IT WAS NORMAL; slurs, poor treatment and open disdain for people of different nationalities, races, religions, genders and sexual orientations were all STANDARD BEHAVIOR; sexual assault and molestation were blamed on the victim and swept under the rug as shameful things; domestic violence was perfectly acceptable as long as you kept it private; and you could beat and torture your livestock and everyone was ok with it, if they didn't find it downright entertaining. There are still problems in society - they're just different problems than came before. And personally, I prefer today's problems and dealing with today's society.

My father is OLD, much older than any of my friends' fathers. I grew up hanging out with him and men who were even older than him. Many of those men were very good people whom I viewed as mentors, but many of them had attitudes that were acceptable 50 years ago, but which I just found utterly depraved. People need to stop clutching their pearls over this idea that we're in some sort of social decline. We're not - we just have different problems than they did 50 years ago.
Still people who post and read are human beings and it would be great if at least most people treat others humanely as like they like to be treated.

The way most of society is going: it's good for some and bad for others imo.
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Old 04-19-2013, 09:07 AM
 
18,681 posts, read 14,302,958 times
Reputation: 15379
People are bastards. They are coated in bastard coating packaged in bastard cases. That is human nature. While there are moments of compassion and demonstrations of human behavior, people are capable of of being hurtful, spiteful, dominant.

City Data is a cross section of human behavior. All sorts of personalities, beliefs, points of view and intelligence levels. There's really nothing new. People can be mean for whatever reason. Be it deep seated hurt, dislike of someone for the reasons listed above, or they are socially awkward. Others don't like what you say. Others make a decision on what that poster is like by the posts made and attitude in those posts.

You give some people power and their true colors show. I remember once telling a now former moderator I'd tell what I had to say to their face. However, I didn't know which face to talk to. When online people may post stuff they wouldn't normally say face to face. Again, nothing new, that has been going on for the last 30 plus years with online bulletin boards, now it's forums, blogs, tweets and facebook.
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