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I think the very paranoia that men have is the measure of how accepted it is not. Black African-Americans are supposedly accepted now, but in fact I have never in my seventy-five years heard or read as much casual and public racism as you do now.
Tolerance that proceeds from legally framed equality is not acceptance. Many people accommodate it, but have a NIMBY attitude where their person life is concerned.
Who says society in general is all that more tolerant of homosexuality? If that were true, there wouldn't be such a massive, passionate and emotional fight (war?) going on to try and gain (or prevent) equal civil rights for gay couples as straight couple's receive.
The "tolerant" society would have no issue granting those rights.
Society in general is not tolerant at all, even if the number of people in society who are tolerant is increasing.
^^^ This is what I was getting at.
If you check the news on any given day, you read more and more about gay rights because its still an on-going battle. If society as a whole were so tolerant, same-sex marriage would be federal law and legal everywhere. We're not there yet. There is still a LOT of opposition against it and homosexuality in general.
Tolerance is like patients. It is a virtue. Tolerance is base in the civil idea of protecting the weakest most vulnerable members of society. It's about being kind as compared to wrathful and cruel. Gays must understand that they are tolerated and under the protection of the law. There is really no wide spread acceptance as we are led to believe. The numbers are minimum in respect to acceptance.
There was a time when gays were preyed upon..It was common for poor kids to hang out in parks late at night and entice cruising gays - then rob and beat them. This is rare now because we are taught not to prey on the weak as much.
I just wish that the gay community would be thankful for the strides in law and in human rights that have taken place over the last few decades. Instead of appreciation for the progress in the civilizing of society- some gays now imagine themselves as entitled -privileged and now imagine themselves as an elite segment of society.
I believe that they should be satisfied with the progress and maybe it's time to back off and live their lives. The more they push an extremist agenda the more the hard won tolerance will fade.
We have an openly lesbian Liberal leader in Ontario - Canada...Last year she was the minister of education. Recently there was a scandal because a poster hung on the wall of an alternative school. It showed a man on his knees holding the butt of another male and was performing oral sex...On the hand of the kneeling male was a wedding band as if to add legitimacy to the act. This poster was on display for months. The kids exposed to it were 7th and 8th graders....This pushing of what is obviously a liberal agenda has had the effect of weakening tolerance. There are limits.
I have always found the double standard of male/male homosexuality vs female/female homosexuality strange. Two beautiful women lip locked in passion is "erotic" to straight men. Two handsome men lip locked in passion is "disgusting" to straight men. Does anyone else find this strange?
Not strange, because straight men find woman+woman action arousing, whereas man+man action is repulsive to them.
From the music they listen to, to what they wear, to how they talk, or even their body language, it seems that despite how supposedly pro-equality and comfortable with homosexuality we are, a lot of men are outright terrified of being viewed as gay by society, or being mistaken as gay. Many teens still use 'gay' as a negative epithet (even if it's lost it's meaning). Many women, too, are turned off by men who act a little gay or feminine, and think bisexual men are like lepers (while female bisexuality is celebrated).
Is this because we're still not really comfortable with homosexuality, particularly male homosexuality? Why is there still such an obsession with trying to be macho? Is it an uncomfortable transition or will we always be like this?
Well, society has gradually developed a tolerance toward gay marriage. More and more straight people have come to recognize that gay marriage presents no kind of threat to straight marriage. And these days we do see gay couples on tv shows (Modern Family, The New Normal, etc).
That said, a straight man doesn't want to be perceived as someone who's into other men. It often has nothing to do with discrimination of any kind. If a straight guy happens to be in a locker room, he wouldn't want to be perceived as someone who's gonna check out other guys.
Ummm, all of us dont find this to be erotic. Its more of a headshaker. Especially if one of the women is hot.
Actually, none of its looks right. To the OP, its not as widely accepted as you think. If Im not mistaken there is still only a handful of states that allow gay marriage. SOme people like myself wont be outright rude to gays but in private conversations are definately not comofortable with it
So, you're more offended by lesbians who are good looking than ones who are not? Sir, I would suggest you think about what the implications of that statement say about you (rather than lesbians), but the rest of the post indicates to me that you are self-satisfied to the point that you don't care.
I really don't understand why you bother to avoid being "outright rude" to people who happen to be homosexual. You think they don't know how you feel? Your statement reminds me of racists who seem to think they're doing the world a favor by not always shouting about how inferior they believe some people are. Yet they still ACT on all their notions, so what difference does it make?
Perhaps you could spend a moment thinking about the fact that people do not CHOSE to be gay, or straight for that matter. If you somehow think straight people are more perfect, or acceptable, or correct, or whatever, than people who are not, then I hope you wake up every morning thanking your Lord that you aren't one of them, because you could be. No one knows for sure what makes people have homosexual preferences. But we do know for sure it's not a choice.
Your wish that millions of people in the world hide one of the most essential factors of their being just because, to you, it doesn't "look right" sounds rather self-centered to me. If you choose to hold on to your prejudices, fine (there's no law against being self-centered), but please don't be trying to deny other Americans their equal rights for such an arbitrary reason as what you like or don't like to look at.
And before I check out, let me correct your statement that "only a handful of states" allow gay marriage. As of today it's twelve: Connecticut, Delaware, Iowa, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Minnesota, New Hampshire, New York, Rhode Island, Vermont, and Washington, as well as the District of Columbia and three Native American tribes. As soon as California gets its lawsuits straightened (no pun intended) out, that will mean more than one-quarter of the population will enjoy complete marriage equality, without benefit of action by the Federal government. And that doesn't even count the states that have some form of civil union, Colorado, Hawaii, Illinois, New Jersey, Nevada, Oregon, and Wisconsin.
I think the very paranoia that men have is the measure of how accepted it is not. Black African-Americans are supposedly accepted now, but in fact I have never in my seventy-five years heard or read as much casual and public racism as you do now.
Tolerance that proceeds from legally framed equality is not acceptance. Many people accommodate it, but have a NIMBY attitude where their person life is concerned.
Don't bring Black Americans into this unless you can show based on credible stats illustrating how Blacks are more accepting of homosexuality. Funny thing is, many gay activists accuse the black community of being homophobic. Another thing, stop comparing racism to homophobia because I, as a black woman do not agree with the inferences. Just because you think Black Americans are accepted does not in any way have a thing to do with homosexuality acceptance as if both groups are comparable.
Oh well the debate goes on. Any blacks that I know who get along well never even think of who is black and who is white. If you are black and you want to make an issue of it...I will avoid you...If you are gay and want to make an issue of it - I will avoid you...people should finally just shut up. This reminds me of an argument that has been resolved long ago but the participant only know one thing- and that is to argue...If it was not this issue it would be another...I say black you say white...I say white you say black...it's getting boring...The fact is straight and proud males no matter what race they belong to do NOT want to be associated with males who can not function fully with a female......I am straight - GET USED TO IT...They should have a pride day for us.
Oh well the debate goes on. Any blacks that I know who get along well never even think of who is black and who is white. If you are black and you want to make an issue of it...I will avoid you...If you are gay and want to make an issue of it - I will avoid you...people should finally just shut up. This reminds me of an argument that has been resolved long ago but the participant only know one thing- and that is to argue...If it was not this issue it would be another...I say black you say white...I say white you say black...it's getting boring...The fact is straight and proud males no matter what race they belong to do NOT want to be associated with males who can not function fully with a female......I am straight - GET USED TO IT...They should have a pride day for us.
Blacks have no choice but to think of race in a racist society either passive or aggressive, and covert and overt, based on the institutional racism within history and practiced in society and certain prejudices carried by the majority. many blacks, especially in California experienced racism by gays first hand after Prop 8, to the level of vitriol, and gays keep claiming blacks are homophobic. So no, many gays want it both ways on the one hand saying blacks are more homophobic, then on the other sayign blacks are more accepting of homosexuality. And it's lies. I didn't live nor vote in California regarding prop 8, but I read the most hateful racist language by gays that would make the KKK proud. Blacks don't make race an issue because it's usually non blacks that make race and issue FIRST. And no, I will never ever agree with black and gay as the same and it's not only historically ignorant, factually inaccurate, but culturally insulting. You aren't black, so you don't understand the point I'm trying to make about invisible rules not in place by me. I'm straight and proud, and black and proud, but I'm not about to play stupid by saying race doesn't matter, nor would I say blacks are more homophobic, then becoming more accepting of homosexuality comparing black civil rights to gay rights because that's just plain ignorant and insulting.
Also: If you are a single straight male looking for a woman...you don't want anyone assuming that you are gay. It really decreases your chances of being successful scoring chicks. If a straight male is well behaved...well spoken...a gentleman...some assume that he is gay. If he dresses freely and with fashion they get the same assumption.
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Couldnt have written this better myself. Your post on this thread are pretty on point
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