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being completely honest, i always speak with mom (57), everytime we want to share something we do it anytime. However, as i don't have a good relationship with dad (55), i very seldom speak with'im. It's such a shame, i know! But he hasn't shown little interest in knowing a bit more about me; even when i was 14, even now that i'm 25, even later.
Location: Democratic Peoples Republic of Redneckistan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by diegoelcretino
being completely honest, i always speak with mom (57), everytime we want to share something we do it anytime. However, as i don't have a good relationship with dad (55), i very seldom speak with'im. It's such a shame, i know! But he hasn't shown little interest in knowing a bit more about me; even when i was 14, even now that i'm 25, even later.
That's a bad deal about your dad...maybe he will wise up one day for the benefit of both of you.
I'll be 40 this year and if I still had my parents to talk to, it would probably be a few times a week, I imagine.
My SO talks to his parents pretty often, a few times a week or so but I would like to see them more than we do. I guess we see them 3x a year or so. The trip is 4 hours, not terrible, but he doesn't like the trip.
I do try and encourage more visits. You never know what you have until it's gone and boy do I know it. I lost my dad when I was 21 and my mom when I was 26.
I'll be 40 this year and if I still had my parents to talk to, it would probably be a few times a week, I imagine.
My SO talks to his parents pretty often, a few times a week or so but I would like to see them more than we do. I guess we see them 3x a year or so. The trip is 4 hours, not terrible, but he doesn't like the trip.
I do try and encourage more visits. You never know what you have until it's gone and boy do I know it. I lost my dad when I was 21 and my mom when I was 26.
Good for you, encouraging your boyfriend's visits to his family. So often we read in this forum about wives who keep the husband's family at arm's distance. I have often wondered why. Insecurity? Jealousy? Possessiveness? Your attitude is great.
I'm in my 40's and speak with my Mom every week or two. She's recently had some medical problems, so I've been following up with known procedures or Dr's visits. We live 3000 miles apart, but I try to visit a couple times a year. A couple times a month my Mom will put my Dad on the line, but he's not a talker and doesn't hear well, so most news is filtered through my Mom.
I speak with my sisters a couple times a month and my brother every couple months. Again, he's not a big talker, so after 15-20 minutes, we're done!
When my Mom was alive, I talked to her several times a week and saw them every weekend. She died in 2007, now I live next to my Dad (84) and we talk a couple of times a week on the phone and I see him every weekend. My DD lives in Cali and we skype every week, text several times a week and talk on the phone rarely. I've always considered my parents "family"
My new husband only sees his parents on Christmas, that's it. And the only time they talk to each other by phone is a few weeks before Christmas to make arrangements. Other than that there is no contact, either by phone, email or in person. The parents live about 260 miles away.
I spent one Christmas at my new husband's parents family house and the mood was average. There was no real emotion or connection but everyone tried to carry on a conversation. I saw no conflict.
I asked my husband about his lack of contact with his Mom and Dad and he said communicating with his parents more often than once a year seems odd to him. He said he was not a kid anymore and once you get into your 40s talking to your folks often just is not done. He insisted that most of his middle age friends rarely see or phone their parents much more than once or twice a year. Especially if they live out of town.
What do you think is a typical amount of time a middle aged man will talk to his parents who live out of town?
Really want to know what I think? I think you husband is bashful to be around his parents or ashamed to talk with them around you or with his friends.
So far I have not heard from anyone who has a relationship with their parents who don't talk at least once every few months. So my husband's relationship of talking only twice a year, but without any conflict, seems odd, but he insists that his friends rarely talk to their parents because they are middle age and that is what middle aged people do.
Location: Chapel Hill, NC, formerly NoVA and Phila
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I live 7-8 hours away from my parents, but we talk almost every day (my mom and I). My dad isn't much of a talker and also, like a previous poster, he doesn't hear well, so we don't talk as often - maybe once every couple of week. I see them about 6 times per year - Thanksgiving, Christmas, Summer, our extended family's annual beach trip, and a couple other random times during the year.
My husband and his mom talk every few days (he's her only child). She lives about 1 hour away and we see her about once per month.
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Really want to know what I think? I think you husband is bashful to be around his parents or ashamed to talk with them around you or with his friends.
