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Old 06-07-2013, 09:45 AM
 
Location: Man with a tan hat
799 posts, read 1,317,560 times
Reputation: 1444

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I have a few friends that can literally speak for a half hour without pausing. Its like a verbal wall. I prefer not to talk on the phone for more than a few minutes (if at all) and avoid calling these individuals because I know that I am in for at least an hour long discussion. One of these people is a mentor of sorts, and there are times when I need some advice about something going on in my career. But the conversations are wincingly long and one sided (though usually filled with some good guidance).

In a few instances, my cell signal dropped and two of these individuals did not notice for at least ten minutes because they were entrenched in their discourse.

Does anyone have any tips for communication with these sorts of individuals? These are all good friendships and relationships so I would prefer not to just cut them out of my life. I try to use email, text and other formats as much as humanly possible, but sometimes a phone call is necessary.
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Old 06-07-2013, 12:13 PM
 
1,866 posts, read 2,261,738 times
Reputation: 1446
Quote:
Originally Posted by whatisthedealwith View Post
I have a few friends that can literally speak for a half hour without pausing. Its like a verbal wall. I prefer not to talk on the phone for more than a few minutes (if at all) and avoid calling these individuals because I know that I am in for at least an hour long discussion. One of these people is a mentor of sorts, and there are times when I need some advice about something going on in my career. But the conversations are wincingly long and one sided (though usually filled with some good guidance).

In a few instances, my cell signal dropped and two of these individuals did not notice for at least ten minutes because they were entrenched in their discourse.

Does anyone have any tips for communication with these sorts of individuals? These are all good friendships and relationships so I would prefer not to just cut them out of my life. I try to use email, text and other formats as much as humanly possible, but sometimes a phone call is necessary.
I have tips, but hey you are going to have to call me and it might take an hour and be totally one sided
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Old 06-07-2013, 12:17 PM
 
Location: South Jersey
819 posts, read 2,837,903 times
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Whenever I want to get off the phone, I tell them my battery is dying and I will call back later.
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Old 06-07-2013, 12:19 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
11,161 posts, read 20,464,230 times
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If you need the advice from your mentor, the price is listening to him for an hour. Pick a time to call when you know you've got time to spare, put your feet up, and be glad for the advice. It's kind of rude to say you need his advice but you want to figure out how to get him off the phone right after you get the advice.
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Old 06-07-2013, 01:00 PM
 
Location: In the city
1,581 posts, read 3,282,683 times
Reputation: 2357
Battery dying is a good one.

Sometimes I will get a friend to pretend to knock on the door or ring the bell and say I have a visitor.

I have a few friends like this too, and I will preface the conversation by saying "I only have 5 minutes, but I wanted to catch you." The conversation gets whittled down to 15 minutes instead of an hour (five actual minutes seems impossible.)
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Old 06-07-2013, 01:08 PM
 
5,222 posts, read 5,090,121 times
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Hang up on yourself.

Wait until you get a chance to say something, then hang up while you're talking.
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Old 06-07-2013, 01:10 PM
 
Location: Western Colorado
11,086 posts, read 12,470,641 times
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"Gotta go, bye". Hang up.
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Old 06-07-2013, 02:11 PM
 
Location: Utah
5,005 posts, read 14,473,528 times
Reputation: 4990
Quote:
Originally Posted by whatisthedealwith View Post
I have a few friends that can literally speak for a half hour without pausing. Its like a verbal wall. I prefer not to talk on the phone for more than a few minutes (if at all) and avoid calling these individuals because I know that I am in for at least an hour long discussion. One of these people is a mentor of sorts, and there are times when I need some advice about something going on in my career. But the conversations are wincingly long and one sided (though usually filled with some good guidance).... .
I am a talker, and I KNOW that I'm a talker. But I resent people who ONLY call me when they NEED something from me, then quickly try to get off the phone. I am a person with feelings and needs too. There isn't always a balance that every effort at communication will benefit all those involved each and very time. But for the most part, it's a give/take that keeps us connected as friends. I do understand how it feels to talk to a talker who only talks about their own life or issues--doesn't ask the other person any questions about what's new with them. It just makes me feel like that person thinks there life is so much more interesting to talk about than mine. I try to limit these conversations.

What seems to work for people calling to use me, is they call when they know I'm getting ready for work and don't have a lot of time to talk.
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Old 06-07-2013, 02:21 PM
 
5,822 posts, read 13,315,622 times
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Ring your own door bell and say you gotta go.
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Old 06-07-2013, 02:24 PM
 
9,228 posts, read 18,936,356 times
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I like Jerry Seinfeld's idea. You just jump in and say "So ANYway...."
That's like the international signal for "I have to get the hell off the phone now."
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