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I have a question I was hoping that I could please inquire about, for all of the child-free folks out there: is getting older or being in your elder years while having no children (and/or no spouse, depending on if you want to be Double-Income, No Kids, vs. never marrying at all for instance) a concern at all for you?
The main reason I ask is because it goes to the issue of potentially having no meaningful social or support network, in the later years of one's life. It also limits your available of people to take care of you, for example if you become injured, sick, or need to be hospitalized, for example. Even if you have a CF spouse but s/he passes away before you, later in life (and also same thing with friends pasing away, as well), without any having children, a person could potentially be like 75-80 years old, but have no one meaningful left, in their lives who really cares about them?
Any thoughts please? How do you deal with and are able to successfully manage these kinds of concerns? Thank you in advance for your comments!
Last edited by Phoenix2017; 06-10-2013 at 10:57 AM..
Reason: Corrected typo
I'm far from being that age but I have a 61 year old single uncle who has never been married. He's rather well off and has saved plenty of money to be used in case he gets disabled or needs care. No one knows who will be responsible for that money though.
Having children has nothing to do with it. My grandparents had 3 sons and they went to a retirement home out of choice even before my grandmother died. They knew none of their sons would move a finger to take care of them so they sorted their own life.
Even today, if it wasn't for the grandchildren and daughters-in-law, my grandfather would have no one visiting him.
Older people without children (and older people with children, really) should have their financial ducks in a row and a plan for retirement, illness, and the related legal issues. Like people have said, having children doesn't guarantee you caretakers for your dotage, and there's no reason that your support system has to be blood relatives.
I've been lonely loser, alone in the world since day one. OP, how has your world persuaded you to worry so much? If you dare to handle the truth, you too, are a loser. Start acting like one and quit worrying.
A lot depends on your extended family. My 88 year old aunt never married but was like a second mother to her many nieces and nephews. She had several (actually many) loving people helping her with her finances. I recently found out that one of my brothers helped pay her taxes for quite a few years. Another of my brothers sent her money every month. Local relatives helped with repairs on her house, mowed the lawn, shoveled snow, bought groceries, helped with bills, etc.
One niece and nephew had Power of Attorney and Power of Health Care and assisted in her recent move into elder housing. It probably is unusual but there were other nieces & nephews and their spouses or children who volunteered to be PoA & PoHC if our aunt needed them.
So, being unmarried & childless wasn't a problem for my aunt. However, I should note that her limited finances were a huge problem. If she didn't have so many relatives willing to help it would have been disastrous.
She worked fulltime from her mid-teens until she was about 65 and half time until one month before her 80th birthday. She had been very private about her finances and no one realized how poor she really was until after she quit working. She told everyone that she worked "to stay active and alert" but actually it was to pay her bills and to be able to buy food.
Last edited by germaine2626; 06-10-2013 at 11:33 AM..
I also hope to have nephews and nieces one day and to get along with them. However, rule number 1 is: take care of everything like you can never count on anyone. It's the safest option.
Even today, if it wasn't for the grandchildren and daughters-in-law, my grandfather would have no one visiting him.
Suppose hypothetically though that if a person had no one else (i.e., no meaningful extended family, and their own parents and/or siblings deceased), in their lives at all? That must be a pretty solitary and very lonely existence...
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