Its the dreaded 23 yr old nephew living with you! (husband, influenced, brother)
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He is my husbands nephew. His Mom left, and took off with another man, so that left his Dad bankrupt, and had to lose the house! Two boys still living at home, 23yr and 21 yr. The 23 ask us if he could stay with us for awhile. He was laid off at the time, but expected to return to work in a few months.
A year has gone by, and he is laid off..again, with a promised date to come back to work.
He was paying us 80 weekly for staying here, up until he got laid off.
He has been sleeping the day away, staying up late. As far as I know, he has not been looking for work, until we jumped his ass the other day, and threatened to kick him out!
He begged for us to let him stay, but I know he will never change. I want him out, but he don`t have anywhere to go! His Dad is living with someone and they have their own issues with her bum kid!
Its starting to cause problems between husband and I because I feel he needs to put his foot up his ass, and he tells me to do it..he says I am the strong one, and he will listen if it comes from me!
Its not my place. His nephew. OOhhhhh...what a mistake we made!
We told him to get a job, or get out! I don`t know if he has been applying or not. He lies a lot, and says he is but.....
I am so sorry that you tried to do a good thing and it is causing so many problems.
I do feel bad for the kids of today. Things are so expensive but laziness is a whole other issue. If this is causing a strain between you and your hubby it sounds like you need to enforce some tough love. I know...easier said than done.
Does he have a car? Who pays for his food and and car/gas? Have you told him he needs to go? Does he have a friend he can move in with?
You need to tell him. Maybe give him an ultimatum. Get a job and pay some rent or leave in 30 days or any amount you settle on.
More than likely once this happens it will not be a happy ending for your future relationship with your nephew but you have to think of yourself and your DH.
I am so sorry that you tried to do a good thing and it is causing so many problems.
I do feel bad for the kids of today. Things are so expensive but laziness is a whole other issue. If this is causing a strain between you and your hubby it sounds like you need to enforce some tough love. I know...easier said than done.
Does he have a car? Who pays for his food and and car/gas? Have you told him he needs to go? Does he have a friend he can move in with?
You need to tell him. Maybe give him an ultimatum. Get a job and pay some rent or leave in 30 days or any amount you settle on.
More than likely once this happens it will not be a happy ending for your future relationship with your nephew but you have to think of yourself and your DH.
Thanks!
Yes, we had to tell him the other day to get a job, or get out. See...he had this job lined out, and he interviewed for it, but failed the drug test! That's when we put our foot down! This job was recommended by a friend, and its one of the best paying factory jobs around.
He has a job, but its not FT, and I seriously think he likes it that way..then he gets his summers off, and draw unemployment. Yes, he has a car. We pay for his food, do his laundry, give him a bed to sleep in. He hasn`t ask us for gas money, and I wouldn`t give it to him anyway.
He was paying us 80 bucks a week, before he got layed off...it has been zero since then.
He does not have anywhere else to go, and I am at the end of my rope with feeling sorry for his lazy ass! I have a 14 yr. old son I have to raise. I can`t, nor do I want to finish raising him!
So...we have all heard this song and dance..he will quit drugs, he will get a job, bla, bla.
I don`t think anything will change, except for me throwing both of their asses outta here!
Thanks!
Yes, we had to tell him the other day to get a job, or get out. See...he had this job lined out, and he interviewed for it, but failed the drug test! That's when we put our foot down! This job was recommended by a friend, and its one of the best paying factory jobs around.
He has a job, but its not FT, and I seriously think he likes it that way..then he gets his summers off, and draw unemployment. Yes, he has a car. We pay for his food, do his laundry, give him a bed to sleep in. He hasn`t ask us for gas money, and I wouldn`t give it to him anyway.
He was paying us 80 bucks a week, before he got layed off...it has been zero since then. He does not have anywhere else to go, and I am at the end of my rope with feeling sorry for his lazy ass! I have a 14 yr. old son I have to raise. I can`t, nor do I want to finish raising him!
So...we have all heard this song and dance..he will quit drugs, he will get a job, bla, bla.
I don`t think anything will change, except for me throwing both of their asses outta here!
It is NOT your problem that he doesn't have a place to live. Many cities have homeless shelters if he can't live with Mom or Dad or a friend.
Normally, I would say give him a 30 day deadline but after failing a drug test, after a friend helped find him a good job I would tell him, "Get a full time job, start paying at least $80 a week, plus start doing a lot of chores around the house or get out in Seven Days". He should be doing his laundry, if not all of the laundry, buying his own food, cooking at least some, if not all of the meals, plus help with the cleaning. Heck, I've had elementary school age foreign exchange students who did more chores around the house than your lazy 23 year old nephew is doing!
And, kick him out in one week, if he hasn't met those requirements.
Be firm, you have already done A LOT more than you needed to do.
Its no wonder his Mom hid in her bedroom all the time!
His family is good at this Boomeranging sh*t then, cause` I think there is at least one in every family.
His other sister has a son who I think maybe 19, but still lives with Mama. I think he got a job recently at Subway.
My husbands Mom still has his older brother who is in his 30`s living at home! I don`t think he ever leaves the house, eva`!
I just want my house back! We can`t afford to keep him around if he`s not going to work, and help contribute around here. Besides, I don`t want my son influenced by him!
What part of GET OUT don`t you get?
Yes, its pretty sad when the Grandma says no, he cannot stay here!!!
He couldn't pass a drug teat for the job? He doesn't want a job. Why should he? Free room and board and laundry service. Set a short deadline and stick to it - or prepare to have him for the next 30 years. Great role model for your 14 yr old.
This is what my main concern is, and the reason I want him out! My husband doesn`t say anything!!
Nephew has got him suckered! What a group!
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This job was recommended by a friend, and its one of the best paying factory jobs around. 
