U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 08-25-2013, 08:46 AM
 
Location: Melbourne, Australia
9,781 posts, read 16,184,264 times
Reputation: 2833

Advertisements

I also think that one can have a nice wedding without breaking the bank. Some people think a wedding is an excuse to splash, and the wedding industry is just licking their lips. The fashion industry really gets into it to with all the bridal fashion, and then there's the decorations.etc. How good a wedding is isn't so dependent on how fancy the venue is, how expensive the food and cake is, whether you arrive in a limo, it's about the people who share in it and about the person you're going to marry.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 08-25-2013, 10:21 AM
 
16,801 posts, read 14,467,642 times
Reputation: 37866
Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
You can have a great wedding *and* a great marriage. Caring about one doesn't mean you can't care about the other.
I know! No one seems to get getting that.

And as a responsible parent, I am not going to give adult children cash. Presumably they will have careers, and a level of pride in earning and saving for what they want. No, I am going to throw them and their friends a nice party within my budget.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-26-2013, 07:06 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
1,823 posts, read 2,389,356 times
Reputation: 2665
Yes, you can have a big flashy wedding & still have a great marriage, but what we are trying to point out is that it's not always necessary to have such a big event (for those of us who don't want that), nor is it necessary to spending $60k on it.

My mom talks about my wedding non-stop, & this weekend she said "I hate to say I can't wait for it to get here, because when it is here, the day will go so fast & it will be over before you know it." I tried to tell her that's actually what I'm looking forward to...for it to be over. She looked at me like I was nuts...but I told her, I am more excited about just being married...not all of the wedding stuff.

Later on I told my fiance what I said to my mother, and I got nervous for a second that I might have offended him, but he simply replied "The wedding is for our family, the rest of our lives is for us." Even with just 25 people, it's a bit too much for us...I would rather go back to the originaly guest list of 15.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-26-2013, 01:36 PM
 
28,906 posts, read 46,623,864 times
Reputation: 46005
Because almost all romantic stories and movies end with the wedding. Very few have the postscript of "Five Years Later" showing the couple doing housework, agonizing over the bills, or shuttling the kids to soccer games and birthday parties.

So the wedding is depicted as the finish line rather than as the starting gate.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-26-2013, 01:56 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,932 posts, read 17,236,141 times
Reputation: 40926
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
So...what I am getting from this thread is that parents don't pay for their daughter's wedding anymore? That is sad.

I am glad I live in a world where this is still the norm! I can't wait for my daughter's wedding, it is going to be awesome. I will be thrilled to give her the gift of the most memorable day of her life.
My friends all paid for their daughters' weddings, except for the few where the wedding couples were very well established and made more money than their parents. Those couples paid for everything themselves.

Some weddings were small and some were large but not one of my friends took out loans or went into debt. If they couldn't afford something big they didn't plan for something big.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-26-2013, 02:04 PM
 
Location: Colorado
18,792 posts, read 4,925,962 times
Reputation: 5465
I never was the kind who liked to be the center of attention and we didn't have much money either.
Went off, got married, 43 years later I guess it wasn't such a bad idea.......But to each his own.
(Back when we got married $20,000 could buy a house...)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-27-2013, 08:20 AM
 
741 posts, read 1,064,683 times
Reputation: 1214
I'll keep this short and sweet...
....Because many women find planning a wedding fun and exciting (whether big or small, elaborate or simple, it's an event to look forward to). Many men too, my husband loved the cake tasting etc, we just thought it was novel experience. And many women love love dressing and primping for that one day.



....Alas, it is also true that a good wedding does not a good marriage make....yes, many people would benefit from putting in more time getting to know each other.

Also, a note about payment: My husband and I budgeted our wedding to pay for ourselves, but half way through the planning my parents surprised us with a sum that covered almost everything except for the photographer and photo package. It was very sweet.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:50 AM.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top