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Old 08-27-2013, 07:47 PM
 
Location: Cary, NC
679 posts, read 1,551,903 times
Reputation: 1126

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You mentioned posting something on a different board about being interested in someone IRL and thinking that he may be jealous. Is it possible that he thought you meant him and it scared him away?
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Old 08-28-2013, 03:18 PM
 
Location: Vero Beach, Fl
2,949 posts, read 12,156,326 times
Reputation: 2074
This sounds like way too much emotional investment for someone you have never met. This is all taking place between msg boards, forums and not real world. So, why not enjoy an evening out with people or friends and stop stressing on the unknowns and what-ifs?
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Old 09-08-2013, 05:49 PM
 
8 posts, read 8,530 times
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Originally Posted by jhlcomp View Post
This sounds like way too much emotional investment for someone you have never met. This is all taking place between msg boards, forums and not real world. So, why not enjoy an evening out with people or friends and stop stressing on the unknowns and what-ifs?
I only now just read your post because CD forums sent me an automated e-mail stating that my thread had new replies. So, yeah - like I've really been laying awake at night worrying about this. I just get to wondering about things sometimes, that's all.

I'll admit to a certain curiosity about Panther since he seems to be a person on my wavelength and near my own part of the world. Sure, maybe. But probably maybe not.

We've exchanged DM's lately and this last time around it's been me who dropped off the radar screen because I had too much going on IRL to spend much time on the Internet. Life goes on.

@chellmi808 My post was so obviously NOT about Panther that he'd have to be a fool to think I meant him, and whatever else Panther may be, he's no fool.

I have a fairly open, chatty writing style while Panther comes across as very reserved. At this point, I think he may back away a little because my open style may make him feel uncomfortable at times. That's one theory anyway. Heck, for all I know he's just some bright kid wasting time in his Mom's basement and only dm's me when he can't text his buddies because they're all in detention. Who knows?

The mysteries of the Internet can keep a person endlessly amused coming up with different scenario's of who REALLY might be on the other side of that computer screen.
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Old 09-09-2013, 11:14 PM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,586 posts, read 23,117,825 times
Reputation: 48552
It is curious that he would discuss a post that you were about to make, actually encourage you to make that post and then seemingly vanish. It sounds as though he wanted to see this controversial opinion or topic expressed on City Data, without involving himself in the possible flack from the post.

Possible City Data flack could include others who post regularly here taking a dislike to you because you hold this strong opinion. The offended people could include moderators. No one wants to offend moderators.

So, from what you have told us, it sounds as though Panther set you up and ran.

You took the similarities between the two of you to mean that there was a possibility that a friendship might develop. I also think that you projected more on to him than you possibly could have known from the interaction that you described. Just because someone believes as you do, does not make them a "prospective friend" - or a nice person.

I am sure that he promised to post in defense of your shared beliefs. It seems that he did not come through, in that respect. I can understand your disappointment, but remember; you do not know this person. You know the person that he has chosen to present- or create - for City Data.

So basically I think he used you. Next time someone asks you to post about a controversial issue, tell them to post themselves.
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Old 09-10-2013, 02:43 PM
 
8 posts, read 8,530 times
Reputation: 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by sheena12 View Post
It is curious that he would discuss a post that you were about to make, actually encourage you to make that post and then seemingly vanish. It sounds as though he wanted to see this controversial opinion or topic expressed on City Data, without involving himself in the possible flack from the post.

Possible City Data flack could include others who post regularly here taking a dislike to you because you hold this strong opinion. The offended people could include moderators. No one wants to offend moderators.

So, from what you have told us, it sounds as though Panther set you up and ran.

You took the similarities between the two of you to mean that there was a possibility that a friendship might develop. I also think that you projected more on to him than you possibly could have known from the interaction that you described. Just because someone believes as you do, does not make them a "prospective friend" - or a nice person.

I am sure that he promised to post in defense of your shared beliefs. It seems that he did not come through, in that respect. I can understand your disappointment, but remember; you do not know this person. You know the person that he has chosen to present- or create - for City Data.

So basically I think he used you. Next time someone asks you to post about a controversial issue, tell them to post themselves.
Thanks, Sheena! Since I first posted about this, I'm beginning to see that this is something a pattern with Panther. That damn thread he encouraged me to start is now longer than War and Peace with plenty of stupid, annoying comments just as I suspected it would get. Panther has contributed very little to it. This is what I get for being such a people pleaser that I even try to please strangers on the Internet.

Panther will entice me out to make various replies that I might not otherwise write, in the mistaken belief that he will respond in kind. Mostly when this happens, Panther will not reply for several days and then send me a DM about something else. This is very annoying.

I have one style of posting that is appropriate for an open forum on the Internet, but if someone sends me e-mails and/or dm's in such a manner that I come to regard them as a cyber friend, I'm a little less guarded. In Panther's case, it's now "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me." Panther has now fooled me twice and has again vanished after getting me to respond in a more self-revelatory manner. I'm beginning to think he's just some married guy who gets his kicks playing sly little games with unwitting strangers on the Internet. On a dating site, I'd be extremely wary of such potential situations. On a forum like the one that Panther and I post on, it never crossed my mind.

Learn something new every day, I guess.
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