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Old 08-24-2013, 02:08 PM
 
Location: Missouri
6,047 posts, read 21,665,781 times
Reputation: 5052

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This is a silly thing to be undecided about, but I am. I am picky about who I accept as a facebook friend - has to be someone I know in "real life" and have an actual relationship with, and must be over the age of 18. (Rarely I might use "adult" language or post a song with explicit lyrics and I don't want to offend any youth, or their parents. And frankly, kid's posts are usually annoying.)

Anyway a few months ago when my BIL and 17 year old nephew were living with DH and I temporarily, my nephew's mother/BIL's ex-wife sent me a friend request. I think ex-SIL and BIL have been divorced for about 8 years. I had never met the woman. I mentioned it to DH and he thought it was odd, and he was fine with me declining the request, which I did. Now my BIL and nephew are no longer staying with us; BIL is having some health issues and is in a care facility for right now, and nephew is living with his mom. I've met his mother now a few times, as she has brought him here a few times to pick up some of his possessions. She is a nice enough person. Now she has sent me another fb friend request.

On one hand I hate to offend someone I do know, and it's not like there is any real harm in accepting the request. But I really don't care about her business, and I don't see why she would care about mine. If she needs to contact us, her son has my phone number and DH's in his cell phone.

Shall I:
1. decline the friend request
2. accept it, but adjust the settings so I don't have to read all of her updates (which I care nothing about)
3. just accept it

Thanks for reading about my silly problem! lol
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Old 08-24-2013, 02:13 PM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
22,580 posts, read 24,175,458 times
Reputation: 49060
#2--there's no harm in accepting the request, but definitely put her in a restricted category so you don't see her updates and she doesn't see most of yours. I am FB friends with a few friends of my mother and mothers of my friends and that's what I've done.
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Old 08-24-2013, 02:25 PM
 
Location: Mostly in my head
19,828 posts, read 56,070,275 times
Reputation: 19030
I agree with FleetieBelle. You can keep her happy while keeping most of your stuff private.
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Old 08-24-2013, 02:42 PM
 
Location: Finally escaped The People's Republic of California
11,119 posts, read 7,574,569 times
Reputation: 6218
Sounds like you don't really want to friend her..... So Don't .....
I have people from work whom I don't really know , friend me all the time, I just ignore Thier request... Just people wanting to know your business ....
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Old 08-24-2013, 02:58 PM
 
4,070 posts, read 3,103,812 times
Reputation: 5620
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cali BassMan View Post
Sounds like you don't really want to friend her..... So Don't .....
I agree. If the OP is not excited to friend this person then she should not do so.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cali BassMan View Post
I have people from work whom I don't really know , friend me all the time, I just ignore Thier request... Just people wanting to know your business ....
I connect with any past and present work friends or acquaintances via LinkedIn only. FB would be for family and everyone else
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Old 08-24-2013, 05:16 PM
 
Location: Arizona
5,967 posts, read 5,317,347 times
Reputation: 18031
I ok everyone that wants to friend me. Even women I've never met. After I friend them I get solicited. I guess they used Facebook since Craigslist got rid of them.

I have never sent anyone a friend request.
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Old 08-24-2013, 05:23 PM
 
5 posts, read 7,261 times
Reputation: 17
Decline.

It's not like she'll get an email saying you declined. It just wont happen, maybe she'll notice eventually or maybe not. Maybe she'll request again, or maybe not.

Maybe she's just one of those people who thinks it's impt to have a high number of facebook friends.
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Old 08-24-2013, 05:25 PM
 
1,478 posts, read 1,901,341 times
Reputation: 2508
If you have to really think about it this much, I think it's not really a good idea.
However, restricting could work. Make it where she can't see most of what you do, either.
Or just ignore the request. It will go away after awhile. You can pretend you never noticed it, if it came up.
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Old 08-24-2013, 06:19 PM
 
Location: In Sticky San Antonio TX
1,437 posts, read 2,557,843 times
Reputation: 1740
I block people like that. They can't find you again. I don't FB anyone I didn't know through a face-to-face meeting. There are some people I block that I have known face-to-face. If someone is so insecure they find you and speak to you about not befriending them, you have every reason to mentally recall this is EXACTLY why you didn't befriend them. People think they need to show courtesy in these circumstances, but I don't. They are being rude by asking about something you answered them about (not befriending them). I've gotten friend requests from people I didn't know on FB. I feel no pain in asking them how they know me and what was our common connection. After a while, they just go away.
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Old 08-24-2013, 06:40 PM
 
Location: Arizona
5,967 posts, read 5,317,347 times
Reputation: 18031
I put nothing on Facebook that I wouldn't want the world to see. I don't care who my friends are. I have neighbors, relatives, and whores for friends.
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