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Could you elaborate? Because I was wondering if it is a hostile thing. However, only in one case could I even think that. The other was a teenage girl and I don't think she has anything against me, LOL.
It is weird because on the other hand, what about when people say NOTHING to you when you get a radically different haircut? So in that case, it's insulting because they didn't notice at all.
#1 I am continually amazed at how many grown people comment on grown-up haircuts. I mean 40-year-old businessmen saying, "Wow, did you get sheared!" when a co-worker comes in with a pretty normal trim. I can't explain this urge to comment on haircuts.
#2 In your situation, it's passive-aggressive because a comment about a haircut is USUALLY followed by the typical reply which is, as you stated, that it looks nice. Even if you don't really believe it, the social convention usually is that if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
Which leads to the passive-aggressive way the cafe lady twice commented on your haircut but withheld the expected compliment. That means she got to express her displeasure indirectly.
#1 I am continually amazed at how many grown people comment on grown-up haircuts. I mean 40-year-old businessmen saying, "Wow, did you get sheared!" when a co-worker comes in with a pretty normal trim. I can't explain this urge to comment on haircuts.
#2 In your situation, it's passive-aggressive because a comment about a haircut is USUALLY followed by the typical reply which is, as you stated, that it looks nice. Even if you don't really believe it, the social convention usually is that if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
Which leads to the passive-aggressive way the cafe lady twice commented on your haircut but withheld the expected compliment. That means she got to express her displeasure indirectly.
LOL...Yeah...I couldn't get her deal...I agree with you--why even bring it up if you are not going to say something nice?!
And now I remember the guy from Whole Foods. He's a really nice guy but he said "You got your hair cut!" as if I had done something beyond the pale. But I get it--people would love to have long, thick hair. The only thing is that they don't have to live with it in the summer.
You shouldnt obsess over something that small. Do you need everyone on earth to compliment your hair? Isnt it nice that a random waitress was nice enough to notice your hair and mention it? I never notice when anyone changes their hair unless its weird like a woman shaving her head bald.
You shouldnt obsess over something that small. Do you need everyone on earth to compliment your hair? Isnt it nice that a random waitress was nice enough to notice your hair and mention it? I never notice when anyone changes their hair unless its weird like a woman shaving her head bald.
If we didn't obsess on small stuff, City Data would be toast
I had my hair cut from fairly long to a choppy short cut, not supper short but definately on the short side. I didn't like the hair cut but didn't want to stress over it since its just hair and it will grow back.
During that time I used to talk to this guy that liked me, I however just saw him as a friend and had absolutely no interest in him. The first time he saw me with my haircut he did not say one word about it. It was like I never had a haircut, and it was quite obvious that I had one. I had a feeling he didn't like it because it wasn't normal for someone not to even say one thing about it but I didn't really care since I didn't like him in a romanic way. Well the next time I saw him he asked me "Did you get a haircut?" I thought to myself, geez you are a very observant guy. I just said 'yes' and he said 'It would have looked better if it was longer' and motioned with his hand the length my hair should have been cut to.
I don't think he said it to be mean spirited, that was how he honestly felt inside. I believe he just thinks women should have long hair. Some people are not aware of the reactions they have, whether verbal or non verbal. We probably all have done it at one point to some degree.
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