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Old 09-05-2013, 05:38 PM
FBJ FBJ started this thread
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,615 posts, read 50,320,986 times
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I ask this because every single time I talk to my platonic friend on the phone all of a sudden when her live in boyfriend pulls up she has to end the call?? Now I don't expect the conversation to continue for much longer by why the sudden end to a long and fun conversation? She makes me feel like she is going to be abused if he finds out she is talking to a guy. But even if he is home and she wanted to call me about the game, she can't do that because she has a man???

We are platonic friends and the last time we saw each other was 2008. We will be talking and then we he pulls up she is like................"I gotta go" and then the conversation is over lol

Or if she is not home yet and he is already home, she ends the call before goes inside the house. Why can't she just tell her boyfriend that she is talking with her friend of 13 years??

And everytime i talk to her I try to talk fast because i know the conversation will end any minute so I told her I need to create a notepad so I will know what to talk about when I saw her calling. lol


As my grandmom would say......"Have you ever heard of such a thing??
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Old 09-05-2013, 06:19 PM
 
Location: SoCal
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What did your friend say when you asked her about it?
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Old 09-05-2013, 07:45 PM
 
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So, how many times has this actually happened?
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Old 09-05-2013, 07:46 PM
FBJ FBJ started this thread
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PeachyMJ View Post
So, how many times has this actually happened?

It's everytime we talk. her cue to get off the phone is when she sees him pulling into the driveway
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Old 09-06-2013, 03:18 AM
 
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I've had lady friends like that...it's not entirely platonic! There's a sexual tension or flirtation, and she is entirely aware of it. Apparently, so is the boyfriend. Don't kid yourself, we are designed by nature to find the opposite sex attractive.

I am not saying there is anything wrong with what you are doing - I do it too. I just think my explanation for her behavior makes sense...
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Old 09-06-2013, 05:05 AM
 
3,637 posts, read 2,698,670 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WestPhillyDude75 View Post
As my grandmom would say......"Have you ever heard of such a thing??
Sure - but as with many things in human relationships the causes and explanations are so numerous that no one on this forum will be able to tell you what it is. Though as usual many will try and act like their explanation is the right one.

She could for example have feelings for you and the guilt of this is causing her to act like she is in an affair. She is projecting her feelings onto her boyfriend and acting like he is already jealous.

Or he could be the jealous type who acts poorly when she talks to other men and so she is cutting you off before he finds out. A bad idea on her part as such behaviour like always putting the phone down when your partner comes into the room actually feeds any paranoia they might already have.

Or he might be a money miser and is annoyed every time she is on the phone and putting the phone bill up.

Or or or or - the possible scenarios are endless. I am afraid the only real answer here is to ask her yourself.
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Old 09-06-2013, 05:10 AM
 
Location: New Albany, IN
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Her boyfriend is probably one of those who doesn't believe in "strictly platonic" friends of the opposite sex, so she ends the call with you before he can grill her with questions... I don't blame people for not believing a man and a woman can't "just be friends," because it seems so many relationships start that way, but sometimes it gets ridiculous. I used to be friends with an older married man at work (I am married too) and some jerk who was jealous tried to start a rumor that the two of us were having sex--no one believed it but it still bothered me.

How long has she been in a relationship with her boyfriend? Don't try to get her to change her phone behavior; it would just make her boyfriend suspicious, and if you start a fight between them you might not be talking to her for a long time.
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Old 09-06-2013, 06:06 AM
FBJ FBJ started this thread
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,615 posts, read 50,320,986 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Larry Siegel View Post
I've had lady friends like that...it's not entirely platonic! There's a sexual tension or flirtation, and she is entirely aware of it. Apparently, so is the boyfriend. Don't kid yourself, we are designed by nature to find the opposite sex attractive.

I am not saying there is anything wrong with what you are doing - I do it too. I just think my explanation for her behavior makes sense...

Naw, we been platonic friends for 13 years, nothing sexual going on we just enjoy talking to each other about everything such as sports, dating, and whatever else
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Old 09-06-2013, 06:08 AM
FBJ FBJ started this thread
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,615 posts, read 50,320,986 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rayah(812) View Post
Her boyfriend is probably one of those who doesn't believe in "strictly platonic" friends of the opposite sex, so she ends the call with you before he can grill her with questions... I don't blame people for not believing a man and a woman can't "just be friends," because it seems so many relationships start that way, but sometimes it gets ridiculous. I used to be friends with an older married man at work (I am married too) and some jerk who was jealous tried to start a rumor that the two of us were having sex--no one believed it but it still bothered me.

How long has she been in a relationship with her boyfriend? Don't try to get her to change her phone behavior; it would just make her boyfriend suspicious, and if you start a fight between them you might not be talking to her for a long time.

They been together about 2 or 3 years.
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Old 09-06-2013, 06:28 AM
 
Location: St Thomas, US Virgin Islands
24,671 posts, read 58,430,951 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monumentus View Post
Or or or or - the possible scenarios are endless. I am afraid the only real answer here is to ask her yourself.
How about the scenario where this lady loves her boyfriend, is happy to see him come home and wants to spend time with him as opposed to spending time yakking about nothing much on the 'phone with a "friend" who she hasn't actually seen for 5 years ... If the OP calls this "friend" a couple of times a year that would be one thing but it sounds from what he says that he calls her quite often. Maybe her perception of the "friendship" is very different from his.
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