should I apologize or leave it be? (person, gossip, issues)

[laughing traveler]

I went out with a friend last week. Because I have some social anxiety I took a little bit of atavan. While we were walking she asked me about a situation I was involved in that didn't work out for me. I told her all about it. It involved other friends and now I feel like a gossip and wonder if I should apologize.

[phonelady61]

yes you most likely should apologize and explain that you have some issues with social anxiety and things should be fine .

[laughing traveler]

It seems I have a hard time when someone asks me for my truth. How do I tell my truth without feeling like a gossip. Do I just ignore my truth. I always feel like I am lying if I don't tell the truth. I am so confused about this.

[shadowwalker]

I tell the truth, if I get asked a question I will answer it. My friends know me and they like that I am not "wishey washey" as they say. Or so they say they do, people I offend don't ask me what they don't want my opinion on twice.

[laughing traveler]

I really shouldn't have said I always feel like I am lying if I don't tell the truth. Because I don't lie, I tell the truth if someone asks me a question. But for some reason it bothered me the other day. I did say to the woman I am sorry if I burdened you with that information.

[mainebrokerman]

she asked,,,you answered...leave it be,,


if it bothers you too much, call her,,,say you dont ever open up,,,but on that day you did, so please keep any info to yourself.

[PAhippo]

I guess to me, gossip is intentionally malicious. You were answering a question; the focus was on you, not the others.


Hopefully your trust in her to respect your privacy will not be broken. If so, she's the one who's gossiping.

[easternerDC]

Depends on what you said and how she reacted. Did she seem put off by what you told her? Were you saying malicious things about the other friends? Most likely she did not even think anything of it.

Most likely apologizing of bringing it up again will just put more focus on it/bring more attention to it, when the whole situation just is no big deal.

Edited to add: Were you telling her things that you were asked to keep in confidence? Were you being critical how others acted?

Just retelling a story does not make you a gossip, but if you are being critical of how people asked, or if you are sharing things about how people acted that you know others would not want you to share - that would make you a gossip.

What exactly did you say/tell this girl?

[G-fused]

Apologize to who? teh person you gossiped with or the person/people you gossiped about?

The world would be boring place without gossip. But the answer to your question is that it depends on what it was about and how strongly you worded it and all that type of stuff.

[laughing traveler]

Thanks everyone. I guess it is my anxiety on a roll again. I get confused in social situations because of these kinds of things. I live alone and don't really have a good sounding board.

thanks again for your help.