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Old 10-21-2013, 04:17 PM
 
Location: locked in a castle
262 posts, read 400,062 times
Reputation: 382

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In your own words, please.

I've been called "mean" in real life, but I feel like a nice person. I'm polite, have manners, and I do whatever it is nice folks do.

What is a mean person in your opinion..
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:32 PM
 
Location: The Great West
2,072 posts, read 1,891,409 times
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Perhaps people confuse you as mean when they really mean unfriendly. And a lot of people aren't actually unfriendly, but reserved. I think some people think shy people are "mean" because they aren't overly gregarious or willing to chit-chat.

I think a mean person is someone who is extremely sarcastic and cranky all the time, without understanding how that affects other people.
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:32 PM
 
12,422 posts, read 14,547,993 times
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A mean person is a person who derives pleasure from other peoples misfortune.
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:41 PM
 
6,461 posts, read 6,094,894 times
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A mean person has little to no empathy, and does not feel remorse when they hurt someone. They might feel joy at someone else's pain, but just as likely they might just feel...meh.

Here are some things a mean person might say:

That girl dresses ugly, and I just told her the truth.

He has bad acne, so he should know he has a pizza face. (After calling someone a pizza face.)
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:54 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn,NY
10,323 posts, read 12,409,777 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by purehuman View Post
A mean person is a person who derives pleasure from other peoples misfortune.
This^^^. The person enjoys making people feel beneath them to stroke their ego, Watching other fail and even facilitating this. Some people who are mean may have suffered at the hand or hands of others and look for a sort of balance by repeating the same behavior. Like a form of cosmic revenge, Many become the very thing they hate. They can harbor much anger at the world and lash out due to it. Unresolved issues in life can infest the mind like a cancer and traumatic experiences leave imprints on the brain that have no sense of time.I also think a truly "mean" person feels this way all the time, Alone and behind closed doors. Anotherwords, It's not an act. The anger and malice toward the world become alive, Like another being.

Then their are others who are just mean by nature. I think many times there is a cause though, Somewhere in the past.
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:56 PM
 
1,035 posts, read 1,555,805 times
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I think "mean" is someone who intentionally hurts others and seems to approach everything with unnecessary bitterness or contempt. I don't consider someone who's honest, even if blunt, to be mean, but I have thick enough skin to separate in that way. A lot of people are so sensitive that they're easily hurt by things that are otherwise harmless. That type of person would call you mean whether you are or not.

So maybe people call you mean because they're sensitive to the way you say or do things or, like someone said, maybe you just don't come off as very friendly to them, who knows.
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Old 10-22-2013, 08:21 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
4,892 posts, read 4,208,296 times
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Mean is hurtful. very simple. If you hurt people unnecessarily, you are mean. Sometimes in life we have to hurt someone, but it's necessary, like breaking up with someone who you don't love. To be mean would be to break up with the person and then hurt them further, by telling them they are ugly or unlovable, or to flaunt your new lover in their face. Mean is the opposite of kind. Kindness is treating others as you would LIKE to be treated, gently but honestly, and with respect.
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Old 10-22-2013, 08:22 AM
 
Location: southwestern PA
20,426 posts, read 35,696,560 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kawaiivictim View Post

I've been called "mean" in real life, but I feel like a nice person. I'm polite, have manners, and I do whatever it is nice folks do.
Some nice people take joking around too far... to the point that they are being mean.
Some nice people take sarcasm to the extreme, also giving the impression of being mean.

Maybe that is what people are seeing in you...
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Old 10-22-2013, 08:32 AM
 
Location: Southwestern, USA
12,597 posts, read 10,725,246 times
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I have a fun, sweet friend...yet, I finally said....your meanness is too much for me.
Why do I think she is mean?
Bec she continually says things that hurt people....at her age she must know her
words are hugely hurtful.
Her intention, deliberately in what I see is for nothing but to hurt.
That is pure meanness to me.

Accidentally, expressing yourself and hurting people is almost unavoidable.
But, cruelty that is intentional for whatever reason, usually, immaturity, is "mean".

Just read some other posts...funny how the word "hurt" is in all of them.
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Old 10-22-2013, 09:58 AM
 
Location: Raleigh
6,964 posts, read 5,183,151 times
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Brutal Honesty can also be interpreted as being mean, especially if it hurts another's feelings, and doubly so if it is due to a situation outside his or her control; someone gave the acne example, that's a good one.
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