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Who cares what they thought then and why in the world would it matter now what they think or do?
So what, someone blocked you on facebook and said ew......
Is this such a crisis that you are wasting time and energy in your life to worry with it?
An actual "mature adult" would not have let it bother them then and would let it bother them even less now so many years later and they certainly would not be asking on a public forum if they are "overreacting".
I can't tell you how many times I've encountered someone who was a jerk in high school, but morphed into someone incredibly nice.
Different strokes for different folks, I guess. If your prerogative is to presume everyone has changed for the better then all the power to you. I respect that you can do that however you should understand that not everyone is willing to take that approach. For some people elements of the past should stay in the rear view mirror.
On second thought I just realized those people could have just been nice to your face a.k.a. polite. Did they all show repeated patterns of niceness? Is there even enough data to run a social experiment or were these all one and done encounters? Politeness and niceness are not the same thing.
Last edited by AtkinsonDan; 11-15-2013 at 05:02 PM..
Yes. Still hurts. Most of them went off to college but chances are those who were a a s h o l e s at 17/18 will still be the same way at 22 / 23 and into their 30s and beyond. It's a cruel and harsh lesson when you realize that people don't cease being cruel.
Great thread. Most people do and I do too. I was relieved to find out my high school prom queen is still single, childless, no house still living in a one bedroom apartment! Ironically she is still as hot as she was in high school. Her eyes were a tad bit lighter than mines, fast forward I got the husband & the son & she got the toilet paper lol!
My word. Get over it, people. Don't you know that just about everybody in high school was an asshat in some form or fashion? Because teenagers are pretty much the most self-centered and self-absorbed people on the planet.
I can't tell you how many times I've encountered someone who was a jerk in high school, but morphed into someone incredibly nice.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AtkinsonDan
Different strokes for different folks, I guess. If your prerogative is to presume everyone has changed for the better then all the power to you. I respect that you can do that however you should understand that not everyone is willing to take that approach. For some people elements of the past should stay in the rear view mirror.
On second thought I just realized those people could have just been nice to your face. Did they all show repeated patterns of niceness? Is there even enough data to run a social experiment or were these all one and done encounters?
Yeah, I'm going to have to take AtkinsonDan's side here. Most of the people I know who were self-centered snobs as kids are now self-centered snobs as adults. Most of the people who were mellow and did their own thing as kids are now mellow adults who do their own thing. The class clowns are more or less the same, the troublemakers are more or less the same, the social butterflies are more or less the same, and even I'm more or less the same. The attitudes rarely change from adolescence to adulthood, their display just looks different.
I was never a victim of bullying nor did I ever have any serious issues with anyone growing up. The only reason I don't like certain people is simply because I found their personalities insufferable. Hence, why I'm not troubled by those people now but I don't care to think about them either. If you're that adult who was a victim of bullying or was outcasted as a kid (as the girl who the OP is talking about may have been), though, I can totally see why you'd hold a grudge.
I graduated from high school in 2009. I'm a 22 year old guy. There are a few people (mostly just one girl) that hates me so much that she blocked me on Facebook. I ran into her the other day and said Hi and was just trying to be nice and she says "ew" and gives me a dirty look. but we graduated over 4 years ago. We are all grown now. Anything that happened in high school is just that. I was a senior in high school 5 years ago. I don't even remember why this girl is mad at me. I know I shouldn't let it bother me now, but my school was small so everybody knows everybody and talks to each other. I have a Facebook page and have seen people I went to school with, but wasn't sure if I should say hello or anything because I don't know how they would react.
Am I just overreacting or do some of you still hold grudges from people you went to high school with?
not high school but I could potentially kill someone who I worked with fifteen years ago while overseas , this person had a profound effect on me and this is the first year I have gotten back to something close to normal
I would be lying if I said that I have absolutely no emotion if I saw someone from hs who was rude to me. As I get older, though, the less I really care about them. The difference for me now would be that I would have no problem if they said hi to me or took genuine interest in me. Doesn't matter to me. It would take a lot for me to continue hold a grudge against someone from hs. They would have had to have done something that I could absolutely never recovered from.
Yeah, I'm going to have to take AtkinsonDan's side here. Most of the people I know who were self-centered snobs as kids are now self-centered snobs as adults. Most of the people who were mellow and did their own thing as kids are now mellow adults who do their own thing. The class clowns are more or less the same, the troublemakers are more or less the same, the social butterflies are more or less the same, and even I'm more or less the same. The attitudes rarely change from adolescence to adulthood, their display just looks different.
I was never a victim of bullying nor did I ever have any serious issues with anyone growing up. The only reason I don't like certain people is simply because I found their personalities insufferable. Hence, why I'm not troubled by those people now but I don't care to think about them either. If you're that adult who was a victim of bullying or was outcasted as a kid (as the girl who the OP is talking about may have been), though, I can totally see why you'd hold a grudge.
I didn't bully her. From what I remember there was a disagreement between us and I might have said something that made her angry. It must have been bad enough that she is still upset about it so many years later. I would apologize but I don't have any contact with her. I was bullied a lot in high school. I had markers and pencils thrown at me, was called names. I never bullied anyone. I was always the one being bullied. There is actually a 5 year reunion being held soon but I'm not going.
It takes at least 10 years -- maybe 15 -- for all the high school nonsense to fade away. I wouldn't give this person another thought for another 10 years, at least.
Great thread. Most people do and I do too. I was relieved to find out my high school prom queen is still single, childless, no house still living in a one bedroom apartment! Ironically she is still as hot as she was in high school. Her eyes were a tad bit lighter than mines, fast forward I got the husband & the son & she got the toilet paper lol!
Whoa! The hatred and resentment here! Are you just jealous that she was the high school prom queen or did she actually do mean things to you? If the latter, I understand, but if the former, well, I'll leave it unsaid.
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