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Old 11-21-2013, 11:36 AM
 
347 posts, read 399,840 times
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gets in the way of your relationship with your sig oth.

been reading some posts on this forum, it's my first time here...

my story is that I didn't know what I was getting myself into. we had our fights but through it all I still love my relationship. sometimes you think that your sig oth family would fully be accepting of you...
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Old 11-21-2013, 11:42 AM
 
3,445 posts, read 4,837,261 times
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Maybe they just dont like YOU.

Interesting...you love your RELATIONSHIP but not your significant other
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Old 11-21-2013, 11:45 AM
 
912 posts, read 1,191,918 times
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Not enough information here.

Sometimes, families meddle too much -- and sometimes, there is a legit concern about the relationship.

Until you give us more background, I don't know which one it is.
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Old 11-21-2013, 11:52 AM
 
347 posts, read 399,840 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 30to66at55 View Post
Maybe they just dont like YOU.

Interesting...you love your RELATIONSHIP but not your significant other
huh?

I do love my sig oth...stop rushing to conclusions.
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Old 11-21-2013, 11:54 AM
 
347 posts, read 399,840 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thatswanlady View Post
Not enough information here.

Sometimes, families meddle too much -- and sometimes, there is a legit concern about the relationship.

Until you give us more background, I don't know which one it is.
I want to know what others have done.

Has anyone had a relationship with someone they love, BEFORE OR NOW, but felt the BIGGEST fault of your relationship wasn't that you two made mistakes, it's that his/her family is preventing both of you from making YOUR OWN MISTAKES at all?

And that you felt that he/she was being controlled by their family emotionally to the point that nothing ever gets DONE between you and your sig oth?
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Old 11-21-2013, 12:05 PM
 
399 posts, read 511,668 times
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Yes. Our answer was boundaries. But you would have to be united in this-in other words, hopefully your significant other is on the same page as you. Or it won't work.
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Old 11-21-2013, 12:09 PM
 
347 posts, read 399,840 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by purplepeach View Post
Yes. Our answer was boundaries. But you would have to be united in this-in other words, hopefully your significant other is on the same page as you. Or it won't work.
In my situation, TO HER, my sig oth family can do no wrong...
Even when they wronged me...

I matured and just decided to take the emotional "hits" and not fight back. The most important thing to me is that even I don't see the family again, I don't lose my sig oth.

What have others done, how extreme has other's relationship been?
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Old 11-21-2013, 02:35 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
10,869 posts, read 18,944,912 times
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Sometimes it improves over time.

My mom used to hate my husband and call him names and try to bribe me to move back home. It took her years to accept him. Now she calls him her son and gives him presents on his birthday and Christmas, which she didn't used to do. She also wants to hug him when she sees him, which he's not wild about.

Probably the best thing you can do for your wife is not to get on her case about what her family does or doesn't do. She can't control them. She will reach a point where she doesn't depend on their good opinion of her, but that's easier if you're supportive of her and don't try to make her choose between you and her family.
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Old 11-21-2013, 03:31 PM
 
12,452 posts, read 14,592,469 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseyexpat View Post
gets in the way of your relationship with your sig oth.

been reading some posts on this forum, it's my first time here...

my story is that I didn't know what I was getting myself into. we had our fights but through it all I still love my relationship. sometimes you think that your sig oth family would fully be accepting of you...
Yes, that would be nice...sometimes though, it takes time for them to accept you...Your sigs family can't possibly get in between what you have with your mate (your relationship), unless you both allow them to.
Sometimes it can take time for the family to trust that you'll do right by their relative.
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Old 11-21-2013, 03:37 PM
 
347 posts, read 399,840 times
Reputation: 129
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hedgehog_Mom View Post
Sometimes it improves over time.

My mom used to hate my husband and call him names and try to bribe me to move back home. It took her years to accept him. Now she calls him her son and gives him presents on his birthday and Christmas, which she didn't used to do. She also wants to hug him when she sees him, which he's not wild about.

Probably the best thing you can do for your wife is not to get on her case about what her family does or doesn't do. She can't control them. She will reach a point where she doesn't depend on their good opinion of her, but that's easier if you're supportive of her and don't try to make her choose between you and her family.
Why do some people need their family's approval?

My partner's family is not perfect even the slightest bit.

They do their fair share of emotional "scams" on everyone when in reality it's not my fault that I am taking my partner away, it's that they want to use my partner, longer than they can.

That mentality isn't right my partner's family's weaknesses are their own and should not be the responsiblity of anyone's but themselves.
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