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Old 12-09-2013, 12:00 PM
12,137 posts, read 6,714,205 times
Reputation: 12997


It's not asking too much to expect your sibling to be supportive when you are doing something positive.

If your sister doesn't have your back, she doesn't respect the relationship, so why should you? You did nothing wrong and she chooses to be cruel so you owe her nothing and you do not have to be a doormat for this kind of behavior. You can let it go, but then what, whatever is causing this attitude will not just go away.
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Old 12-12-2013, 09:38 PM
2,727 posts, read 2,277,922 times
Reputation: 4065
For many things in life, people (especially in suburbs) who don't live in nyc don't understand people who live in nyc. And people who live in nyc, don't understand the lives of people who don't live in nyc.

I pay an insane amount of money for a seemingly small apartment in soho. Almost three times my parents mortgage pmt on their 4 bedroom beautiful home. They don't understand why I would do this. I don't understand why I wouldn't want to walk out my front door and be in the middle of amazing nightlife, restaurants, friends, my gym.

Neither is right, neither wrong. Whatever makes you happy. There's a reason she lives in Atlanta, and a reason you live in nyc. Bc different things are important to each of you.
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Old 12-13-2013, 01:16 PM
Location: Loudon, TN
5,809 posts, read 4,857,183 times
Reputation: 19522
Sez she won't be visiting? I'd just tell sis "that's okay because I haven't invited you".
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Old 12-14-2013, 05:21 AM
2,564 posts, read 2,933,247 times
Reputation: 2790
Your sister sounds like a Negative Nancy. I have a Mother who would react similar to your sister, if it were a similar situation as you are describing. Just don't rely on your sister's advice as it could be a form of sibling rivalry.

And don't call your sister back, wait for her to contact you, she obviously sounds really immature. Also, good luck on buying the co-op.
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Old 12-14-2013, 08:47 AM
18,377 posts, read 23,565,807 times
Reputation: 34443
why do you allow the most negative person in the world, influence your decisions?? the person in the mirror, is the only person you have to answer for.
not all will share in your joy and adventure,,,,jealousy is a snake in the grass...it will bite while trying to remain hidden

if you can afford it,,,and youve worked hard for this,,,then by all means do it...

walk the path that you light, not in the shadows of others
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Old 12-14-2013, 11:18 AM
3,752 posts, read 7,493,798 times
Reputation: 3711
She is jealous. Carry on and enjoy your new home. Im jealous! I think it is a great accomplishment to be able to afford a place in NYC. Good for you!
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Old 12-14-2013, 12:10 PM
12,540 posts, read 12,546,070 times
Reputation: 28901
Look at it this way: If she never comes to visit, you'll never have to listen to her complain about your home while she's actually in it. Maybe that will deny you the pleasure of then throwing her out of it, but at least you won't waste any good food and wine feeding her judgmental yap beforehand.

Consider your kitchen to be a shield of sorts, designed to keep out bitter nincompoops who are probably just seething with envy that you actually have the money to live in New York in the first place. That is no small feat, so congratulations!
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Old 12-14-2013, 12:34 PM
Location: Texas
15,891 posts, read 15,315,146 times
Reputation: 62658
Live your life without letting your sister rain on your parade. You seem to be doing exactly that. Negative people have no place in my life and the older I get the less I allow them in.

Congratulations on the co-op. You are going to be a perfectly happy person. Say "hi" to the bagels in Zabar's the next time your drop by.

I have friends with a co-op at 110th and Amsterdam. It's small but it suits their purposes. The way I look at it is that they have less to keep clean and almost anything they want is a short walk for them. IMO, NYC is the most exciting city on the planet.
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Old 12-14-2013, 01:09 PM
12,758 posts, read 14,110,686 times
Reputation: 34963
Just do it...get that place you want.

Forget about telling her she was rude, or whatever...what's the point? It will just become an even bigger deal between the two of you.

Good luck, be happy.
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Old 12-14-2013, 01:18 PM
Location: Washington, DC & New York
10,833 posts, read 26,449,732 times
Reputation: 6907
She's trying to put you off the apartment, so she can come visit. She just wants a 2BR, so that there is a guest room. With a 1BR, there's only a living room, which does not make for comfortable guest accommodations.

It's your share loan and maintenance that will cover the proprietary lease in the building, so she has no input unless she is offering to pay the bills. Some kitchens do look strange, so perhaps she was just going about her dislikes in a rude manner. Does the apartment have a weird layout? I have seen some bizarre kitchens, even in Pre-Wars, so I would take the opinion with a grain of salt, and ask a friend/relative/etc. to look at the place and give an honest assessment, in person, as pictures rarely do a space justice, unless the listing agent hired a professional photographer. Don't let your buyer's enthusiasm overlook something that may stand out to another because you are in love with the unit. I know someone who bought under those conditions, not listening to people who gave an honest assessment, and resale was a terrible experience.

As long as the building's financial condition is good, and the unit is acceptable to you, she should be happy that you have found a place that you like. I don't even know you, but am happy for your enthusiasm in purchase, especially as a co-op is a great way to control costs in an expensive city.
All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages.
~William Shakespeare
(As You Like It Act II, Scene VII)

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