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Old 12-26-2013, 07:33 PM
Location: Henderson, NV
1,091 posts, read 1,214,530 times
Reputation: 1765


Originally Posted by cdnirene View Post
Obviously you're giving off the wrong vibe if you find most people aren't treating you with respect. It's certainly not a problem I encounter.

When you say you are being nice to strangers, are you sure it's not coming off as ingratiating/door mat?

Until you figure out the problem, I suggest you forget trying to be nice with strangers in a service setting. Instead focus on being courteous and polite unless given reason not to be. After all, you're looking for respect from an employee being paid to help you, not a BFF.
Obviously you've never lived in Vegas. Pardon me is not in the vernacular. Neither is any common courtesy unless they want a tip from you. It's a very unhappy city.
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Old 12-26-2013, 07:36 PM
7,310 posts, read 4,938,475 times
Reputation: 6330
Originally Posted by L'Artiste View Post
I'm not a very confrontational person, I like for things to go smoothly and everyone to feel okay, but I am finding that people are always either pushy, incompetent, rude or nothing like this. Its like people only react the right way with me having to be mean or rude from the start, and to me thats draining because i'm not like that? like I was just now nice to a sales person, and she became rude, I had to tell her off to get a supervisor. Now I feel overwhelm/anxious and the conversation was 30 mins ago, and this confrontation no matter how small it will be will have me anxious/angry for the rest of the day, maybe I even will think of this incident in a few months. Why did it have to be this way? Why couldn't she just use the same temperament that I was using with her. I mean if I'm being nice/congenial whats so hard about everyone else doing the same.
I have found everything you say to be true. I also don't like confrontation, but being aggressive and nasty seems to get things done.
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Old 12-27-2013, 01:31 AM
3,047 posts, read 6,563,823 times
Reputation: 2057
I was always like this for 35 years I hate confrontation. I will say sorry even if I felt I was right with family for example to avoid it. I have seen this change a little not so much with family but in daily life. This may not seem big but for example the other day I was at the store and the sales lady was so rude and I told her she did not need to be nasty and she apologized. I would of never said anything before.
I think in most things in life moderation is best. You don't have to be nasty to get your point across but speaking up for yourself is important cause feeling walked on does not feel good.
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