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Hello all! Tell me who is right in this scenario. A teen, say Bob, just had all four his wisdom teeth removed yesterday. While he is taking pain medication and is not in pain, he is still uncomfortable due to the swelling and not able to eat anything for dinner other than broth and mashed potatoes. Family has come in from out of town, and the entire family is having dinner together. You must note, however, that the teen has already seen the family from out of town just two days ago, so it is not like he hasn't seen them in so long. Also, the family is not Christian so this is not really a "Christmas Eve dinner," and they also are supposed to have lunch together tomorrow (too much family time if you ask me seeing each other three times in four days).
The grandmother of the family is making steaks with a declicious sauce, which is Bob's favorite meal in the world, but now he doesn't get to eat it. Bob has to have broth from soup and mashed potatoes while his family is all shoving their faces with steaks (which I think is pretty rude, but maybe that's just me). Bob also loves the grandmother's desserts, but won't be able to eat that either. He is also a bit uncomfortable with his mouth, his mouth is puffy, and he is taking A LOT of pills.
Bob says that he would really prefer to stay home, since he has already spent hours with his family from out of town, he is quite frankly jealous that his family will be shoving in steaks while he is spooning himself broth, his face is puffy, and he can't even bit down without biting down on his inner gums.
I tend to agree with Bob, but the parents don't, and was wondering what you all thought. Remember all four wisdom teeth were all yanked out of his mouth yesterday, so you can't help but feel sorry for the teen. Also of note is that the parents let her other son skip the lunch on Sunday for a "Fantasy Football Party", but just call Bob a baby. My heart just sinks for Bob, because I know how horrible getting your wisdom teeth out are and I think it was all just poorly planned.
I don't think it's insensitive that they're enjoying a meal he can't eat right now, but I can't wrap my head around family members not having any sympathy for the pain/discomfort of having all your wisdom teeth out at once.
I don't think it's insensitive that they're enjoying a meal he can't eat right now, but I can't wrap my head around family members not having any sympathy for the pain/discomfort of having all your wisdom teeth out at once.
I guess I just thought that because the grandparents knew Bob was coming, to decide to make the meal that he absolutely loves best when he can't eat it was just a little bit of a slap in the face. I would understand if he hadn't seen his family in a while, but to force him to rush back to see them after oral surgery the previous day seems just a bit harsh and tyrannical.
This is all overly dramatic. "Tyrannical"? It's not like they're shoving food into his mouth.
In our family, we've had moms who just had C-sections sit on the couch within eyesight of the dinner table while the extended family eats a meal.
I've had a niece with an impacted wisdom tooth sit in the next room (with the kids table nearby) during Thanksgiving.
Stuff like this happens. You learn to deal with it and move on.
It's family. Bob can go to the dinner and take part in the fellowship, and eat what he can eat. He will be back to normal life in a few days.
I guess tyrannical was a bit harsh, lol. I guess the point I was trying to get across is that if this were your grandchild, would you make him sit on the couch and watch the rest of his family eat his favorite meal ever?
That said, yes it is unsympathetic to expect Bob to act, well, normal...He's sick. Even with no pain,he's uncomfortable because of the swelling and probably a bit oogie from the med.
But I also don't think Bob should expect the family to change the menu just because of his surgery. He's probably not the only one that likes that stuff and he's eaten it before and can eat it again.
I think it'd be fine to say Bob's not feeling well and can't come...I don't think it's that big a deal, though. If that is her specialty meal, I don't see why she can't make it for out of towners just because it's Bob's favorite. Sounds like Bob and Grandma actually live near each other and the others don't, and it might be some of those folks favorite meal of hers, too. If I were Bob I'd ask her if she can make him a steak after he heals. Then I would bring a giant milkshake for Bob, and I guarantee the other kids will be the jealous ones.
I guess tyrannical was a bit harsh, lol. I guess the point I was trying to get across is that if this were your grandchild, would you make him sit on the couch and watch the rest of his family eat his favorite meal ever?
Yes, but no one is "making their grandchild sit on the couch...." He can sit where he feels like it, although it sounds like he is fine to sit at the table by now. His pain will tell him what he can and cannot eat.
As I said, I have had this kind of thing happen before, and people adapt and get over it.
This scenario is the very definition of "making a mountain out of a molehill."
That said, yes it is unsympathetic to expect Bob to act, well, normal...He's sick. Even with no pain,he's uncomfortable because of the swelling and probably a bit oogie from the med.
But I also don't think Bob should expect the family to change the menu just because of his surgery. He's probably not the only one that likes that stuff and he's eaten it before and can eat it again.
I agree I don't think Bob should force his grandmother to change the menu. I just think he shouldn't be forced to come in discomfort and have to sit around watching everyone eat it while he is swollen up and uncomfortable.
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