My wife hates my son's new GF (husband, person, present)
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Irish, if you could not continue as the breadwinner would your wife 1. take over and become the primary breadwinner? 2. happily cut her frivolous spending (clothes, jewelry, vacations, restaurant meals) down by 90 or 100% ? 3. Or would she divorce you without a seconds though and "take everything that you still owned"?
It might be a good topic to discuss at your next therapy session.
These are not relevant questions for him. It's actually not something they have ever even considered. His one reaction ("Who would hire ...?") proves that.
They aren't interested in reality anyway. "Break it down for her?" WHY would she ever sit still for a lesson on how much a vacation condo in Chicago costs?
It's all about denial and avoidance. Money soothes a LOT of pain.
Irish, if you could not continue as the breadwinner would your wife 1. take over and become the primary breadwinner? 2. happily cut her frivolous spending (clothes, jewelry, vacations, restaurant meals) down by 90 or 100% ? 3. Or would she divorce you without a seconds though and "take everything that you still owned"?
It might be a good topic to discuss at your next therapy session.
Quote:
Originally Posted by irishfan77
1) No
2) No
3) I honestly don't know
Thank you for answering my questions. One of the reasons that I pushed you to answer was not only had something like this (severe illness or disability totally derailing future plans) happened us it also happened to several of our friends. It really seemed like an issue that you had never considered.
At least you know where you stand with your wife and marriage if someone unexpected comes up. I suggest that you talk to your insurance agent and make sure that you have an enormous amount of disability insurance coverage and a lot of long term care coverage. Of course, IMHO, having a spouse that is a true adult life partner is better but with insurance at least you know that you probably wouldn't end up living on the street or in a homeless shelter if a real disaster struck.
It just occurred to me that I never asked you what you would do if a health disaster hit your spouse? I remember when my aunt had a massive stroke and was bedridden, almost totally non-verbal but mentally alert and completely dependent on the care of her spouse & children, in her home, for the last ten or twelve years of her life. You keep saying how much you love your wife (albeit annoyed by her childish ways and expensive habits) but that situation can happen as well. Would you still love your wife as much as you love her now if she was in a wheelchair, or burned in a kitchen fire, has early onset dementia or disfigured in a car accident? What if your spouse needed to go on a medication that caused massive weight gain as a side effect? Or are you a "fair weather" spouse as well? Just something for you to think about.
Irish, when you open up your life to others on C-D be prepared for posters to ask you to consider some difficult issues. Life is not always high paying jobs, international vacations, fancy clothes and expensive restaurants. Heck, for the majority of people life is non of those things.
Last edited by germaine2626; 05-30-2014 at 05:52 AM..
Irish, are you still considering moving to a lower COL area? Does your wife have any clue what your actual financial situation is? Does she ever even see the bills? These threads don't exactly line up with your wife's desire for a shopping condo in Chicago.
Irish, are you still considering moving to a lower COL area? Does your wife have any clue what your actual financial situation is? Does she ever even see the bills? These threads don't exactly line up with your wife's desire for a shopping condo in Chicago.
Well, she said she wouldn’t work or consider going to CC as she is a “ devoted housewife" and those 2 would take time away from her " housewife duties"
Let me ask you this, and please don't read this in a snobbish tone, but who would hire a women with no college background and who hasn't worked in over a decade? Go back to waitressing?
My mom did not have a college degree, did not have any work experience other than teenage jobs and she went back to work after being a SAHM for 20 years. She is full time at our local library, great job, decent pay, great benefits. It's possible. Actually alot of moms are in the same boat due to divorce, deaths, boredom, etc.
And did you really think you could ask a bunch of women that question without getting flack for it? I can see that you probably meant it as though you genuinely don't know, but my husband would've gotten a major talking to for that one, ha.
Well, she said she wouldn’t work or consider going to CC as she is a “ devoted housewife" and those 2 would take time away from her " housewife duties"
Well yeah, she's had the perfect setup all these years. Why would she want to work?
Sorry, I am just now chiming in on this.. I tried to read all the responses but this thread is LONG so I've only seen bits and pieces.
I think people need to lay off on the fact that wife doesn't and prefers not to work in the future. So the hell what? She doesn't need to, Irish is ok with it, and really doesn't factor into the fact that she hates the GF. Pfffffftttttt... it doesn't matter here. Now, if it did bother Irish, then he can start a new thread about it.
I think people need to lay off on the fact that wife doesn't and prefers not to work in the future. So the hell what? She doesn't need to, Irish is ok with it, and really doesn't factor into the fact that she hates the GF. Pfffffftttttt... it doesn't matter here. Now, if it did bother Irish, then he can start a new thread about it.
She doesn't and prefers not to work.... but she sure expects to shop whenever she wants and get a new condo? Hell no. And I'm a woman. ha. The husband provides and takes vacations, buys "nice" things, but that is just ridiculous. Unless, irishman would prefer to just accept and let her be that way... then that's their choice.
And this thread has not been about the g/f in quite a while, ha.
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