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Old 02-16-2014, 11:49 AM
2,096 posts, read 2,939,800 times
Reputation: 2254


Just call her-what is the big whoop?
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Old 02-19-2014, 04:30 PM
Location: SLC, UT
1,571 posts, read 2,153,006 times
Reputation: 3833
Originally Posted by Bartleby9 View Post
It's that she said she would call me and then didn't that annoys me. But like you said, that could just be how she is, because for as long as I've known her she's done that. She'll say that she'll call you right back or that she'll call you later on that night and then doesn't.
Then that's just how she is, and she's not likely to change. Especially if for years you didn't say anything about it, and suddenly are now. So you either need to decide that you'll take her as she is, and not expect her to call when she says she will, or you need to slowly detach yourself from her.

Maybe, in general, you need to be less available to her anyway - for instance, when she calls five times in a short amount of time and it's not an emergency, just say something like, "I was worried it was an emergency. But right now I'm actually pretty busy doing __________ and can't talk. Talk to you later..." This is not to be passive aggressive or "punishing her," but rather, it's about finding some other friends, developing some hobbies, and basically, balancing out your friendship. I say this because of your "power" comment - if you're feeling like she's holding all the cards, then that means your relationship with her is probably skewed - she's getting what she wants when she wants, and you only get her when she wants. In addition, you still do harbor some more-than-friendship feelings towards her. That's not healthy, and you should probably help balance the "power" by not being so available. Doing so may help you be less annoyed with her inability to get back to you when she says she will, too.

As to her not getting back to you about the trip, that was a special circumstance. It was rude, but a special circumstance doesn't override years of her being her. Meaning, yes, she should've gotten back to you about the trip, but outside of special circumstances like that, she's being the same person she's always been - she shouldn't need to change that just because who she is has suddenly become annoying to you.
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Old 02-19-2014, 05:41 PM
365 posts, read 522,718 times
Reputation: 353
She is a fair weathered friend. I wouldn't contact her anymore ....sit back and wait. If she does contact you should act like your busy and will call her back then don't. I'm sick of friends like this ..... delete from life and move on.
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Old 02-26-2014, 10:44 AM
15,824 posts, read 18,440,406 times
Reputation: 25604
The signs are the signs....you demanding a friend to do anything simply makes you less desirable as a friend. It seems inappropriate for you to harass her about anything...She is likely going to keep avoiding you. Do you not have other friends to hang out with?? Time to make a life.
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Old 03-06-2014, 10:50 AM
Location: On a lake
45 posts, read 45,809 times
Reputation: 176
Happens to me all the time. Every time one of my friends e-mails me he says "More tomorrow", but he never does. I think people say these things just to end a conversation. It's like a greeting of "How are you" but many times people don't even answer the question and say "How are you" back or just start talking.

In my opinion most people don't have many manners anymore.
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Old 03-06-2014, 02:42 PM
1,035 posts, read 1,556,296 times
Reputation: 2154
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
You are needy and still aren't over her. This is likely her subconscious way of telling you that you are suffocating her. Give her some distance and get over it.
Originally Posted by jkcoop View Post
That was my first thought.
Mine too.

Originally Posted by ellenrr View Post
For some people "call you tomorrow" doesn't mean call you tomorrow. It means I'll talk to you sometime in the near future.
And this was my second.
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