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Am I overreacting?
Do to my parents religion I really could not celebrate my birthday so I got use to it and some people in school new this. However I tell them Im not really practicing a JW though.
This year no one really said Happy Birthday on my facebook wall. Not to mention one of the girls I went to school with in high school that I just messaged yesterday and ask me to donate to her function and today didnt even say happy birthday.
I already planned this but I have another facebook that I will have as my main one and I plan to just have people that I comment or actually have a conversation here and there. I have 162 "friends" on facebook however that will be cut down to maybe 10-15 people.
I just find it weird how I would wish people a happy birthday on their profile yet they dont for me and yes I know its Saturday night and people are out but not during the day? Not to mention I see people on their facebook because I can see what their likes and statuses.
I mean I guess its my fault for not having any friends besides the fact I couldnt hang out with people when I was in school growing up. I think some of it is my fault because I have social anxiety so I really don't go out and meet people.
I honestly really don't feel like I have friends but just acquaintances. However I just dont understand a guy like me that is really nice and kind and does not have any friends I just find it sad, yet very ironic. I let people in front of me when they are driving, and hold the door for people, and I dont expect for people to say thank you, because I would just want somebody to let me over or someone hold the door for me if i have a lot of stuff.
I can cut people off without really thinking twice like my mom, but for me I would like to feel notice sometimes that im not invisible but I guess.
So I will keep a couple of people from my current facebook but the rest of the people I have to drop.
However I really want to make real friends, Im 23 so I know Im getting older and it seems the older you get the more tough it is to make friends idk but thats my opinion.
I just find it sad that out of 162 friends on facebook only 6 people wished me a happy birthday today! SMH!
How to make friends at the age of 23? Also Im gay too but it doesnt have to do anything about why I dont have friends. The only places where I think I can make friends in the LGBT community is to volunteer at a LGBT center.
Yea you're overreacting a bit I would say, I mean you said you feel like you don't have any friends already, wouldn't it seem a little strange and not very genuine if all of your FB friends enthusiastically wished you well on your birthday? Seems like you're a loner but you haven't made peace with it yet. I plan on temporarily deleting my FB when my b-day rolls around because something just seems fake to me about people I haven't spoken to all year suddenly jumping up and wishing me a happy birthday.
Do you actively post on facebook? Not just read other people's stuff but post? Some people never post anything, so I figure they are never on there, and I don't usually wish them a happy birthday.
@Kibbiekat I wouldnt say actively I post at least once a week however not everyday. IDK some of the people that im following not even that but im starting to realize that alot of people are narcissistic on facebook they post like every hour or post a picture of them everyday. Its really annoying really! Im seeing this on my news feed. Or people putting their personal business on their statuses which to me most would keep to themselves. I can blast all my personal problems on forums like this because no one really knows who I am but you wont see me ever posting these on my fb.
The only places where I think I can make friends in the LGBT community is to volunteer at a LGBT center.
That's a start. Join other community organizations, clubs, etc. where people who share your general interests gather. Branch out in areas that you have a vague interest in but have never pursued. REAL people meet up in REAL settings and don't stagnate sitting in front of a screen accumulating illusory FB "friends" in cyberspace. Good luck!
Social media:
Use it to the extent of its purpose - it's about people, organizations and your community. So just do FB searches about your area and you'd be surprised the groups you run into. For example, let say you live in Maplecity, you may find that page "Maplecity Downtown" "The Historical Maplecity Society". Look up art centers, concerts and then "Like" those pages. All their activities will start to show up on your news feed.
Same thing with news organizations. If you like National Geographic or other science topics, search for those and click "Like" the page. Their daily news will show up on your newsfeed.
Once you've made your FB full of stuff and information you like, you'll have more fun viewing it. If you "Like" stuff others will see that you are online and active. You can share cool pics, articles, etc.
So now you can interact with your friends on topics that aren't just based on "Look at my dog. Look at my new car," or other things that may be perceived as "showing off."
Friendships:
If you're looking to make friends IRL, read about stuff you like, see if there are groups (as a poster mentioned look into meet up.com). Just surround yourself with stuff you like, so when you do strike up a conversation with someone, you can have a smooth conversation about current events, etc.
BTW, I don't think you're overreacting to people not wishing you a happy birthday - I can see where it'd be a downer. But, also, people may remember you for not celebrating your birthday in the past and so maybe that's why they didn't bother….
On my birthday I get people that do wish me happy bday, but Im not really a big poster so I dont bother to wish my friends happy bday. Not everyone does it, dont worry about it. Its only facebook its not real life.
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