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Old 04-08-2014, 12:23 PM
 
Location: Prince Georges County, MD (formerly Long Island, NY)
1,555 posts, read 2,243,316 times
Reputation: 1647

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lieneke View Post
Is this a situation where an employed adult, one that qualifies for a credit card, is not contributing to household expenses, so the parent took initiative and simply charged one of the bills to the adult child's account? ... and the employed adult child that does not contribute financially, who is living off/with the parent, is upset? What about the parent? For how long has the parent been upset about a lack of financial contribution? What other steps has the parent taken to secure some sort of financial contribution?

... or did I completely misunderstand the situation?
I'd pay to see the look on the detective's face if the mom said this to them.
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Old 04-08-2014, 12:36 PM
 
293 posts, read 436,791 times
Reputation: 1318
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShiningBritish View Post
She went behind my back and did it anyways. As i was getting ready for school(College), i received a phone call from her asking for my SS. I didn't know what she needed it for but she sounded like she was in a rush so i just gave it to her. But when she came home, she says so nonchalantly, "i needed your credit to keep the electricity on. You want to have lights,right? You live here don't you?" What a slap to the face. And my father just defends her, saying things like "You're selfish. You don't have no job and you never took out anything and yet you're worried about this". He's just really ignorant because , i just took out a loan to go to college because they wouldn't fork over one red dime.

Was I really being selfish? They didn't even want to talk to me about. They just went on ahead and did it.
You know, the more we talk about this, the fishier it sounds to me. I can't see how a delinquent electric bill, once having reached the point where the service is being disconnected, could be cured by putting the bill in someone else's name. The power company would require the old bill to be paid first at a minimum, and most likely also require a deposit from the new account holder. I'm wondering if the parents were even truthful about the reason they needed the son/daughter's SSN. This sounds more like opening a new account than paying an existing bill. All the more reason for the OP to investigate what exactly his/her credit is being used for.
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Old 04-08-2014, 12:49 PM
 
16,025 posts, read 19,604,450 times
Reputation: 26195
Your Mother is guilty of a crime. A very difficult situation you have been placed in. Either you report her...or this may happen again. Maybe, you should get that lifelock or something that prevents your ss# and credit from being misused ....so that she can never use your ss# again...
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Old 04-08-2014, 01:11 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,941 posts, read 17,243,367 times
Reputation: 40965
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lieneke View Post
Is this a situation where an employed adult, one that qualifies for a credit card, is not contributing to household expenses, so the parent took initiative and simply charged one of the bills to the adult child's account? ... and the employed adult child that does not contribute financially, who is living off/with the parent, is upset? What about the parent? For how long has the parent been upset about a lack of financial contribution? What other steps has the parent taken to secure some sort of financial contribution?

... or did I completely misunderstand the situation?
Yes, you completely misunderstood the situation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by lurtsman View Post
This is identity theft. It is a crime. You'll want the number removed, and you'll want to have a watch put on your social security number so it is not used again fraudulently. If they wouldn't keep the power on without a new social security number, then your parents have completely trashed their credit. If they trashed their cars, would you want to loan them yours? No. You don't want them touching your credit record because clearly they are incapable of being responsible adults. They demonstrated this by ruining their credit, and by committing identity theft.

You do not have to press charges. You do have to get your credit frozen so they can't use it.
The situation appears to be that the parents were so delinquent in paying their utility bills (at least the electric bill) that the power was in the process of being turned off or had already been turned off. So the parents lied to their daughter and lied to the electric company and opened a new electric company account in the daughter's name. If a parent does that it is pretty likely that they have lied about other financial things and possibly stolen her identity before.

Various posters have listed situations where this happened to friends or relatives and it has taken years to fix the errors. In the mean time the person with the stolen identity frequently can not rent an apartment, get utilities in their own name, buy a car or a house, get a loan or get a credit card.

A friend of mine had his identity stolen (in his case by a co-worker who has access to personnel records). It took over three years and several thousand dollars in attorney fees and other costs before everything was straightened out. He said it was an absolute nightmare that he didn't wish on his worst enemy. BTW the co-worker went to prison.

So, Leineke, it isn't just a simple thing like the "parents taking initiative" to get some money from their daughter.

Last edited by germaine2626; 04-08-2014 at 02:09 PM..
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Old 04-08-2014, 01:39 PM
 
Location: The Greater Houston Metro Area
8,985 posts, read 14,638,446 times
Reputation: 14868
Sounds like a handy defense. "Your Honor, I just took the initiative to rob a convenience store."
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Old 04-08-2014, 02:10 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,941 posts, read 17,243,367 times
Reputation: 40965
Quote:
Originally Posted by cheryjohns View Post
Sounds like a handy defense. "Your Honor, I just took the initiative to rob a convenience store."
Pretty Funny!
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Old 04-08-2014, 06:33 PM
 
Location: Tucson for awhile longer
8,872 posts, read 13,513,202 times
Reputation: 29030
ShiningBritish, do you know how to check your credit score? You can do it for free once a year. Don't fall for those online scams (e.g. creditreport.com) that will offer you credit checks for "free" and then start charging you monthly before you can cancel the service. The credit bureaus are required by the Federal Trade Commission to allow you a report without charge once a year. Apply for your free report from the government:
Free Credit Reports | Consumer Information

If you have student loans, someone probably already ran a credit check on you. But the report will show how many other people did, too. So if your parents took out credit in your name, it should show up (even if they just asked and were denied, you should know that). I do agree with an earlier poster that it's unlikely your parents actually did use your SS# pay their electric bill. If their payments were in arrears to the point the power was about to be shut off, it's likely they would have to put extra money in an escrow account. But all utilities aren't the same everywhere so it's probably possible that they just changed the bill to your name. But if they did, when the bill comes it will be addressed to you. And if it is, you are responsible for paying it. It could be severely damaging to your credit if you even paid late, let alone didn't pay at all. Get a credit report and call the electric company immediately if the report says you are in a financial relationship with them.

Are your parents really devious enough to intercept the bill so you don't see it's addressed to you? And even if they are, where are they getting the money to pay the bill in the future? Perhaps it's possible that they supplied the electric company with your name and SS# as a reference, like a co-signer, meaning you will be on the hook for the bills if the account falls delinquent again. YOU DON'T WANT THIS TO HAPPEN.

I'm assuming that you are 18 or more. If so, you don't need to be legally emancipated from your parents to get away from them. If you "divorce" yourself from them financially, you might actually be eligible for more student assistance than you are getting now. Also possibly food assistance or other government programs. You should contact your school's financial aid office and see what advice they have for you. You might be able to leave their house if you got some additional help elsewhere.

If you were just an employed adult living still under your parent's roof when you were over 18, I would agree that you have some responsibility to share your parents' living expenses. But if you're an employed student, they aren't paying any of your school bills, AND you're helping with your brother's expenses, I take another view. For your future financial safety, please don't let this slide. You don't want to end up in the kind of hole they appear to be in. It's bad enough you will graduate with debt.
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Old 04-08-2014, 07:04 PM
 
Location: The Greater Houston Metro Area
8,985 posts, read 14,638,446 times
Reputation: 14868
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl View Post
ShiningBritish, do you know how to check your credit score? You can do it for free once a year. Don't fall for those online scams (e.g. creditreport.com) that will offer you credit checks for "free" and then start charging you monthly before you can cancel the service. The credit bureaus are required by the Federal Trade Commission to allow you a report without charge once a year. Apply for your free report from the government:
Free Credit Reports | Consumer Information

If you have student loans, someone probably already ran a credit check on you. But the report will show how many other people did, too. So if your parents took out credit in your name, it should show up (even if they just asked and were denied, you should know that). I do agree with an earlier poster that it's unlikely your parents actually did use your SS# pay their electric bill. If their payments were in arrears to the point the power was about to be shut off, it's likely they would have to put extra money in an escrow account. But all utilities aren't the same everywhere so it's probably possible that they just changed the bill to your name. But if they did, when the bill comes it will be addressed to you. And if it is, you are responsible for paying it. It could be severely damaging to your credit if you even paid late, let alone didn't pay at all. Get a credit report and call the electric company immediately if the report says you are in a financial relationship with them.

Are your parents really devious enough to intercept the bill so you don't see it's addressed to you? And even if they are, where are they getting the money to pay the bill in the future? Perhaps it's possible that they supplied the electric company with your name and SS# as a reference, like a co-signer, meaning you will be on the hook for the bills if the account falls delinquent again. YOU DON'T WANT THIS TO HAPPEN.

I'm assuming that you are 18 or more. If so, you don't need to be legally emancipated from your parents to get away from them. If you "divorce" yourself from them financially, you might actually be eligible for more student assistance than you are getting now. Also possibly food assistance or other government programs. You should contact your school's financial aid office and see what advice they have for you. You might be able to leave their house if you got some additional help elsewhere.

If you were just an employed adult living still under your parent's roof when you were over 18, I would agree that you have some responsibility to share your parents' living expenses. But if you're an employed student, they aren't paying any of your school bills, AND you're helping with your brother's expenses, I take another view. For your future financial safety, please don't let this slide. You don't want to end up in the kind of hole they appear to be in. It's bad enough you will graduate with debt.
Very solid advice. Much better than just saying file charges (and then what?)
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Old 04-08-2014, 08:09 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,941 posts, read 17,243,367 times
Reputation: 40965
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl View Post
ShiningBritish, do you know how to check your credit score? You can do it for free once a year. Don't fall for those online scams (e.g. creditreport.com) that will offer you credit checks for "free" and then start charging you monthly before you can cancel the service. The credit bureaus are required by the Federal Trade Commission to allow you a report without charge once a year. Apply for your free report from the government:
Free Credit Reports | Consumer Information

If you have student loans, someone probably already ran a credit check on you. But the report will show how many other people did, too. So if your parents took out credit in your name, it should show up (even if they just asked and were denied, you should know that). I do agree with an earlier poster that it's unlikely your parents actually did use your SS# pay their electric bill. If their payments were in arrears to the point the power was about to be shut off, it's likely they would have to put extra money in an escrow account. But all utilities aren't the same everywhere so it's probably possible that they just changed the bill to your name. But if they did, when the bill comes it will be addressed to you. And if it is, you are responsible for paying it. It could be severely damaging to your credit if you even paid late, let alone didn't pay at all. Get a credit report and call the electric company immediately if the report says you are in a financial relationship with them.

Are your parents really devious enough to intercept the bill so you don't see it's addressed to you? And even if they are, where are they getting the money to pay the bill in the future? Perhaps it's possible that they supplied the electric company with your name and SS# as a reference, like a co-signer, meaning you will be on the hook for the bills if the account falls delinquent again. YOU DON'T WANT THIS TO HAPPEN.

I'm assuming that you are 18 or more. If so, you don't need to be legally emancipated from your parents to get away from them. If you "divorce" yourself from them financially, you might actually be eligible for more student assistance than you are getting now. Also possibly food assistance or other government programs. You should contact your school's financial aid office and see what advice they have for you. You might be able to leave their house if you got some additional help elsewhere.

If you were just an employed adult living still under your parent's roof when you were over 18, I would agree that you have some responsibility to share your parents' living expenses. But if you're an employed student, they aren't paying any of your school bills, AND you're helping with your brother's expenses, I take another view. For your future financial safety, please don't let this slide. You don't want to end up in the kind of hole they appear to be in. It's bad enough you will graduate with debt.
Excellent points.
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Old 04-09-2014, 07:18 AM
 
16,568 posts, read 14,026,756 times
Reputation: 20523
Quote:
Originally Posted by bigjretrac View Post
No, the OP does not owe her parents money. Electricity, hot showers, and groceries (things mentioned in your post) are basic necessities that that come with having a child. If the OP's parents weren't ready for those expenses, they should've found something else to do instead of having wine and listening to Barry White.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkGFOakMEmI
This is a college aged adult. If they choose to support the adult child that is their business but if they cannot afford to they no longer "owe" him any necessities.

What they did was immoral at best, illegal at worst, and the reality is the ops best interest to not become homeless and keep the ship stable until he gets thru college and then he can cut ties.
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