U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 04-14-2014, 12:58 PM
 
Location: Silicon Valley
18,004 posts, read 22,741,002 times
Reputation: 34905

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Osito View Post
My brother will if my mother tells him to enough times, but he never calls me.
I was thinking it sounds like your mom is bugging all the kids to be closer. Not just you.

At one point in my life, I was in my 30's, I decided to quit sending cards, etc., to my brother, because he never made any effort for me. My mother tried to get me to keep it up, and I told her I get nothing out of the relationship. If he wants to call me, he has my number. He never did. Just really self-absorbed with his own life, friends and family (once he got married).

I let him go, he let me go, and we never cared lol!

Again, though, it was my mom who was trying to have a close-knit family. It just wasn't going to happen.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 04-14-2014, 01:05 PM
 
Location: Texas
43,415 posts, read 52,413,699 times
Reputation: 70388
Heard this on a call in show (though it is not the first time I have heard bull crap like this):

Woman calls in to complain that her daughter-in-law didn't send a birthday card or call on the father-in-law's birthday.
Host of the show was like, "Uh, did your son call?"
"No."

Wtf!!!!???? People always blame the woman. It is the son's dad, but they are complaining about the daughter-in-law.

Unbelievable, but I see examples of this all the time IRL.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-14-2014, 01:15 PM
 
6,461 posts, read 6,450,609 times
Reputation: 9799
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
Heard this on a call in show (though it is not the first time I have heard bull crap like this):

Woman calls in to complain that her daughter-in-law didn't send a birthday card or call on the father-in-law's birthday.
Host of the show was like, "Uh, did your son call?"
"No."

Wtf!!!!???? People always blame the woman. It is the son's dad, but they are complaining about the daughter-in-law.

Unbelievable, but I see examples of this all the time IRL.
This is so true! I refuse to do all of that stuff for my husband, and I am sure thein laws blame me. I don't care.

I remind him to call his mom every few weeks, and I will set up trips so that my daughter gets to see grandma. Other than that....it's up to him.

We see my family more often because I set things up. I used to try to keep it more balanced, but that's really not my job.

We used to split Christmas fairly equally, but one year they guilted him into not visiting my family. So now they must work around our plans. If they can't share us, why would I jump through hoops to see them?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-14-2014, 02:08 PM
 
Location: Windham County, VT
10,620 posts, read 4,922,576 times
Reputation: 20798
Agree that the job of keeping folks connected *tends* to fall to women more often than men.

It's also a personality thing, if someone is very social, that person may be the "hub" of the interpersonal wheel, so to speak-
and without that person making all that effort, the "spokes" (everybody else in extended family) tend to go their separate ways.

My mother was that sort, and since her death the family is pretty much out of touch with each other.
Whether we liked her or not, she was a unifying force/influence (connecting us & passing on our news to each other).
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:25 AM.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top