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Old 05-06-2014, 09:28 AM
 
Location: Louisiana and Pennsylvania
2,755 posts, read 5,321,811 times
Reputation: 2685

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Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm Retired Now View Post
I just got back from the Dentist and while he seems perfectly professional, he had absolutely no personality. Cold as ice. No smile, small talk or greeting of any kind.

My family physician is the same. ALL BUSINESS. Very professional but cold as ice.

Went to get my haircut and the barber did not exchange any small talk at all, just cut my hair.

I understand these guys are busy and have a job to do but shouldn't they at least engage me in 30 seconds of small talk?

What are you small talk, smile or greeting expectations of your Dentist, Doctor, Vet, or Barber (Hair Stylist)?
I wouldn't want someone chating me up while I'm trying to do my own work. As long as the doctors, barbers etc do what I pay them to do and do it right, that's all I care about.
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Old 05-06-2014, 11:25 AM
 
1,451 posts, read 1,581,540 times
Reputation: 1337
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondebaerde View Post
The question is do "I" (some guy on the forums) expect Dr, Vet, Dentist, Barber to be friendly. Answer is no, no, no, and hell no.

In business school, we learned pretty conclusively that people "prefer" to work with friendly idiots vs. competent jerks. That was a total surprise to me: I'll take a competent jerk in a hot second over a bubbly professional service provider. Thus, I'm a minority view.

My dentist is as warm as June 21 at McMurdo Station in Antarctica, but solves dental problems like nobody's business. The vet had to help me terminate a long term companion, year and a half ago: enough said. The barber gives the best men's non-foofy haircuts of anyone in town, and is gruff and curmudgeonly at the best of times (unless discussing the Seahawks). I don't have a doctor, but don't need my hand held whenever that time comes.

And I'll take each of those (3 of 4 that I use) in a hot second over some chatty-patty.
This is an insightful comment.

It is surprising how often people will equate "nice" with competence.

I think for some that are viewed as being cold at times they are simply trying to stick to a schedule rather than getting sidetracked at having everyone else's appointments be delayed.
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Old 05-06-2014, 11:49 AM
 
13,225 posts, read 17,771,271 times
Reputation: 19889
Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm Retired Now View Post
I discussed this with some friends and they said it is quite common that the service people they come in contact with in retail stores to act like robots and they take it all in stride. But the general feeling is someone like a doctor or dentist is expected to be friendly, but not a friend. If they do too much chatting it holds everyone else up and I won't be too friendly if I have to wait too long.

Yes, knowing their stuff is the most important, but it does not have to be one or the other, it can be both.
My dentist or OB are not retail people. Nice food for thought though. With all your other soft skill issues you may just want to refrain from having cavities.豈
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Old 05-06-2014, 12:21 PM
 
Location: Colorado
18,828 posts, read 4,942,035 times
Reputation: 5476
Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm Retired Now View Post
I just got back from the Dentist and while he seems perfectly professional, he had absolutely no personality. Cold as ice. No smile, small talk or greeting of any kind.

My family physician is the same. ALL BUSINESS. Very professional but cold as ice.

Went to get my haircut and the barber did not exchange any small talk at all, just cut my hair.

I understand these guys are busy and have a job to do but shouldn't they at least engage me in 30 seconds of small talk?

What are you small talk, smile or greeting expectations of your Dentist, Doctor, Vet, or Barber (Hair Stylist)?
All the people you mention are friendly enough in my area...Colorado..they all smile, make some
small talk, are not cold as ice. I'm sorry that the professionals you deal with do not make you
feel comfortable....
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Old 05-06-2014, 12:26 PM
 
1,480 posts, read 2,302,705 times
Reputation: 1611
Quote:
Originally Posted by pekemom View Post
All the people you mention are friendly enough in my area...Colorado..they all smile, make some
small talk, are not cold as ice. I'm sorry that the professionals you deal with do not make you
feel comfortable....
Why would they need to smile and make small talk? According to the other posters if they act like robots that would be fine with them as long as their technical skills are good.
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Old 05-06-2014, 01:30 PM
 
1,167 posts, read 1,101,443 times
Reputation: 2142
They don't need to be chatty and smiley necessarily, but I do want them to be personable, especially anyone in the medical field since I want them to be responsive to what I'm talking to them about.

Personally, I look for both personable, and competent. If I can't get both, I'll settle for competent and not outright rude. There are enough professionals in any of the above industries that I don't need to settle for less.
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Old 05-06-2014, 01:38 PM
 
1,035 posts, read 1,653,622 times
Reputation: 2156
I expect everyone to be "friendly" as in decent and respectful.

I don't expect anyone to be "friendly" as in interacts with me like we're buddies beyond my actual friends. It's nice when they are, but I don't expect it.
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Old 05-06-2014, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Washington State. Not Seattle.
2,054 posts, read 2,318,921 times
Reputation: 2777
As a veterinarian, I'll add my perspective.

When see clients who are new - I try to ask how they are doing, where they moved from (if they are new to the area), and then ask them about their animal(s). If they are established patients - I make a point to ask how their other animals are doing, make sure to call them by name, and, if appropriate, ask them what their group (i.e. 4H club, Rotary club, etc.) is doing - we do live in a very small town, after all.

I don't ask anyone, even people I know, things like "How was the keg party last weekend?", "Did you get drunk or dance on the bar?", or "How did your cancer surgery go?" Unless, of course, the client brings up those things, then I try to carry on the conversation.

So, I guess I try to be personable. Without being too personal.
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Old 05-06-2014, 02:15 PM
 
Location: Greater NYC
2,907 posts, read 4,922,554 times
Reputation: 3872
I find it ironic that here we are all on AN ONLINE FORUM which is often used for local recommendations etc., in fact, it's one the reasons why this entire forum was created, and yet there's no mention of recommendations in this thread.

All of our doctors (primary care and specialists, for us, our children and our pets), dentists, hairstylists etc. not only provide the highest quality care and have received recognition for it, they also have terrific bedside manners. Why? Because I did my research and asked around on my local forum, Yelp, various other online local groups and, finally, asked my friends for their recs.

So, yes, all of these people are well-suited to my care needs and my communication style. A tiny bit of research will do that for you.
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Old 05-06-2014, 02:59 PM
 
Location: St Thomas, US Virgin Islands
24,671 posts, read 58,387,722 times
Reputation: 26526
Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm Retired Now View Post
Why would they need to smile and make small talk?
Isn't that the whole point of your thread - that you're not getting that from the professionals you're dealing with and are complaining about it? Do YOU say, "Good Morning" to them and smile? You seem to expect an awful lot of others while offering precious little of yourself. Which is the norm for you, or so it appears. Your interactions with people in general seem to be continually fraught with dilemmas which leads to an inescapable conclusion.
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