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If you did that, you'd get a piece of my mind, that's for sure. You don't get to order my kids around.
And ordering kids around like you're a drill sergeant is usually not the most effective method anyway. Show kids some respect and treat them like humans, and when you need them to do something, they'll usually play along. When we need our daughter to lower her voice, we ask her to please do so and explain why. Four times out of five, it works. Much more effective in the long term, in terms of building trust and respect, rather than just shouting a kid down because "I said so." I don't want my kid to learn blind obedience based on fear and intimidation.
I bolded a phrase show respect and treat them like humans why should I when they continually rock their seatbacks into my knees and be loud and yet you'd think I'M the wrong one? You (as their parent) are the wrong one, YOU let them do that by not paying attention and scolding them for doing something wrong. I had this happen when I saw Frozen (and I know there are more, I just can't recall), luckily the adult told the kid to stop about midway when it got REALLY bad.
I find it's effective to tell the children to be quiet (don't ask - TELL. They are kids. Not your boss or your dad or anyone in authority. YOU are the authority as an adult). The kids are usually responsive. If the parents get mad I just tell them that since they don't feel like parenting, someone else has to do it.
Edited to add: I have also sought refunds from managers when a movie is disrupted. They give them, usually without question.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adrian71
If you did that, you'd get a piece of my mind, that's for sure. You don't get to order my kids around.
Would you also get mad if another adult did ask rather than tell? Just curious.
I can see getting mad at demands coming from another adult. But I do agree with mizzile on the whole "respect" thing. You shouldn't teach kids that they deserve respect regardless of how they behave. If they are inconsiderate of those around them, in that instant, they deserve zero respect and parents should see that. Hence, though I wouldn't like it, I probably wouldn't defend my son if another adult simply told him "You need to be quiet, people are trying to watch the movie".
That's, you know, if I was neglecting to do it myself.
I find it's effective to tell the children to be quiet (don't ask - TELL. They are kids. Not your boss or your dad or anyone in authority. YOU are the authority as an adult). The kids are usually responsive. If the parents get mad I just tell them that since they don't feel like parenting, someone else has to do it.
Edited to add: I have also sought refunds from managers when a movie is disrupted. They give them, usually without question.
Actually, the more polite thing is to turn around, smile, and say, "Can I ask you a favor? Can I ask you to stop kicking my chair, please?"
If the parents have any sense of decency, they will be mortified and say, "JUNIOR! Stop that!"
And if it continues, that's when you get the usher to come in and make order.
Hmmm, that's fine, minus the bit about it being a "favor"... Oh, and the word "please"
Well, do you want the kid to stop kicking your chair, or do you want to risk getting into an altercation with an angry parent and then having everyone else in the theater look at you like you're the jerk for flexing your muscles in competition with a 6-year-old because you feel that kid should respect your authoritah?
Me, I prefer to do what works, politely and quietly, so I can get back to watching the movie.
I guess it depends on what bothers you more. Me, I'd be more ticked off that I sat through an entire movie with background noise (because people can't control/discipline their kids, no less, which is another pet peeve altogether) than I would be over missing a "chunk" of the movie. I'd probably miss more of the movie by trying (and failing) to ignore the background noise than to simply find the manager and resolve it quickly. And I think I could get someone in there to silence the family within 5 minutes, personally.
I get your point... but I do disagree a bit.
I think the OP has a right to vent on a forum.
With the price of tickets today the theaters should have someone in there to ask the woman to step outside until her baby stops crying so that everyone can enjoy what they paid for.
The woman with the child shouldin my opinion after a couple of minutes of trying to get her baby to stop crying got up and waited outside until the child stopped crying. Of course there are lots of people that disagree and will say that she paid for a ticket just like everyone else and baby's cry. But I personally think it is selfish and inconsiderate for a parent to assume that they have a right to inconvenience and ruin a movie for someone else just because they want to see it. Movies are entertainment and a luxury, not a requirement. I would argue the exact opposite for a baby crying on an airplane. Clearly transportation is a requirement for many things and people with babies need transportation the same as everyone else.
When I had young kids I simply had to wait for a babysitter or for it to come out on DVD.. (o.k. VHS... but it was the same concept
I've heard the argument that people are more selfish and self centered today, but I don't think that's true. I think the cost of movies has gone up so much that people are just way more annoyed than before. I know I ruined my share of movies in junior high as I was the king of making fart noises from the back of the theater making all my junior high friends laugh like nobody's business... I do believe the theaters should have a duty to remove the woman, just as they should have removed my obnoxious 13 year old self that thought fart noises were the key to happiness back then.
After all they sit there and monitor people for cell phone use and recording the movie.
Yeah...wouldn't want to be caught setting a good example by being polite yourself or anything...
What is your premise, exactly? That me not begging for a child to stop kicking my chair will teach said child to be "impolite"? Are we really worried about that, at this point? I think not.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilac110
Well, do you want the kid to stop kicking your chair, or do you want to risk getting into an altercation with an angry parent and then having everyone else in the theater look at you like you're the jerk for flexing your muscles in competition with a 6-year-old because you feel that kid should respect your authoritah?
People are going to do whatever they want, bad parents included. What I would want is to give the child a very clear chance to stop being a jerk before having them corrected/removed.
And these types of parents are very likely to pick a fight with you even if you do use the word "please", IME. That's why there are people like kkaes1 and stan4 who just don't go to the movies anymore. You can't "please" everyone (pun intended), and it's silly to try.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilac110
Me, I prefer to do what works, politely and quietly, so I can get back to watching the movie.
If I get resistance from the parent all because I didn't say "please" to the kid, they deserve to get kicked out of the theater. I'll enjoy knowing I made that happen every bit as much as the five minutes I missed of the movie. Likely more, really, because movies nowadays ain't what they used to be!
Are there any other concerns for these entitled children?
What is your premise, exactly? That me not begging for a child to stop kicking my chair will teach said child to be "impolite"? Are we really worried about that, at this point? I think not.
I guess I missed the point where being polite, using the word "please" became "begging"...
I was brought up to be polite. I set an example for my kids by being polite as the norm. My kids are polite. I guess some on here aren't seeing the connection. Or the irony that the people complaining about rude people are feeling pretty entitled to be rude themselves. Or at least apparently feel that politeness somehow threatens their authority. Interesting.
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You (as their parent) are the wrong one, YOU let them do that by not paying attention and scolding them for doing something wrong. I had this happen when I saw Frozen (and I know there are more, I just can't recall), luckily the adult told the kid to stop about midway when it got REALLY bad.
