She said "People are such vile little beings and the source of my problems!"

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by Emigrations

I've been going back and forth with an acquaintance/friend in Facebook comments over the last couple of days. She's 29 and has been homeless for the past several months, but recently found a roommate situation, so she now has a roof over head. She works part-time for minimum wage and is majoring in acting at a regional state university. Obviously, she is making major life errors, one after another.

Anyway, instead of being grateful that she does have shelter, she's been incessantly posting pictures of the "deplorable" apartment on Facebook. Granted, the place needs a cleaning and the dishes/pans need to be washed in the kitchen, but the place could be gotten presentable in half an hour. It's not unhealthy, but messy and cluttered.

I told her that she needs to move somewhere where she can get a decent job FIRST, and then pursue college in her spare time, rather than the other way around. She's going on about how she "hates money" and that "people are such disgusting and vile little beings that she wants to be alone, and that OTHER PEOPLE are the source of her troubles."

She doesn't get the fact that if she had an adequate amount of money, she could live on her own, keep things the way she wants them, do things at her own pace, etc. She's in complete denial that a large part of her current situation are because of poor prior decisions she's made, stemming back many, many years, and consistently blames other people.

Do you know a lot of people who enjoy deflecting blame like this?

Your friend has emotional problems and isn't very nice to boot.

You're right. People who have continuous problems in their lives are that way for a reason: Namely because they haven't conducted their lives in anything approaching a wise and judicious way. And yet it's NEVER THEIR FAULT. Your friend is one of those.

I'm not saying punt. But I wouldn't emotionally invest in this person until she gets her act together in life. Because while you should move heaven and earth to help someone who is out there doing her best, it's another thing entirely to be the continual support system for one who refuses to live with any wisdom -- yet expects others to clean up her messes.

[thisismyname10]

Sadly, I've had family members and friends like this. She will pull you down with her if you allow it. These people have to see things for themselves, on their own terms. Unfortunately they love to play the victim card... thrive on it, actually, and they feed off of people falling for it.
I've now considered them "toxic" people that I have to distance myself from. I have started hiding their posts on facebook and even deleted a few... life is too short to be bogged down by someone else's nonsense.