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Old 07-24-2014, 02:58 PM
 
Location: Studio City, CA 91604
2,671 posts, read 2,951,383 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tiredtired View Post
My mother-in-law says our mattress is too firm and therefore she can't stay at our house overnight unless we buy a new mattress that fits her desired plush/firmness. This problem seems to be unique to our home, she says at many other homes and doesn't complain about their mattress. There isn't anything wrong with our mattress, yes it is a firm, but it is in good condition, hardly used, and free of bedbugs. Nothing wrong with it.

My wife says we should buy a new mattress so MIL can say with us.

I say no, we're not going to go buy a new mattress just to fit one particular guest, and one whom I think will find a different excuse not to stay with us. I try to convince my wife that the issues with staying with us extend far beyond the mattress, but she remains fixated that the mattress is the primary reason why she won't stay with us.

Your thoughts?
My thoughts? Okay...You sound like a real douche!
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Old 07-24-2014, 04:50 PM
 
Location: Lebanon, OH
5,866 posts, read 6,296,708 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tiredtired View Post
My mother-in-law says our mattress is too firm


will find a different excuse not to stay with us.
Yep, once you buy goldilocks a new mattress the porridge will be too hot.
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Old 07-24-2014, 05:00 PM
 
5,413 posts, read 5,123,388 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kttam186290 View Post
My thoughts? Okay...You sound like a real douche!
Why? The OP has larger issues than this.....but I really do not get why they should buy a new mattress when no other guests have complained and the OP and his wife both think that the MIL is making excuses anyway.

If your mother came over and said that she didn't like to sit on your couch, would you be a real douche if you don't run out and buy a new one?
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Old 07-24-2014, 07:28 PM
 
5,849 posts, read 5,689,166 times
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OP, please decide what do YOU want in YOUR house?

Do you feel the mother in law is making too many demands and overstepping her boundaries in YOUR house?

Or is this something you could accommodate reasonably and something you would LIKE to have to improve your household items/furniture?

If you get her a new mattress, will she ask for more things? if so what will you do or not.

So you may have to be prepared for more requests/demands if she is a demanding type that is never satisfied/controliing.

Will it make your wife happy? That might be worth it.

See what you want to do in YOUR house. A bed is not that much money really. Will getting the mattress solve the problems or will it cause more?

its up to you really.
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Old 07-24-2014, 08:25 PM
 
Location: Canada
3,880 posts, read 2,712,661 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChicagoMeO View Post
OP, please decide what do YOU want in YOUR house?

Do you feel the mother in law is making too many demands and overstepping her boundaries in YOUR house?
That's rather a quaint old-fashioned view for the year 2014. It's the wife's home too but you feel that it should be 100% the husband's decision? Heck, the wife may be contributing more to the household expenses than her husband is. You don't know. You also don't know how often the couple may have been overnight guests in MIL's home.
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Old 07-24-2014, 08:41 PM
 
13,005 posts, read 15,343,820 times
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We always let my parents have our bed when they visited. It was the biggest and most comfortable. They were older and had aches and pains and disabilities. No big deal to let them use our bed when they stayed.
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Old 07-24-2014, 08:56 PM
 
Location: Honolulu, Makiki
351 posts, read 455,632 times
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Default That's exactly what my brother does...

Quote:
Originally Posted by luzianne View Post
We always let my parents have our bed when they visited. It was the biggest and most comfortable. They were older and had aches and pains and disabilities. No big deal to let them use our bed when they stayed.
That's exactly what my brother and my sister in law do. He has a huge house in North Carolina that has 6 bedrooms and 4 full bathrooms. The master bedroom has a nice king size bed. They only have one son, although his mother in law lives with them too.

My sister and brother in law on the other hand have a small 3 bedroom house in this small town in Indiana, and when my parents make the trip all the way from Hawaii to visit, they give my parents an uncomfortable futon to sleep in. Go figure!
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Old 07-25-2014, 02:44 AM
 
Location: Florida
19,700 posts, read 19,807,688 times
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Give her your bed the next time she visits.
If she still makes excuses not to come or complains about the bed if she does come, you'll pretty much know it's not the mattress.
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Old 07-25-2014, 06:00 AM
 
5,849 posts, read 5,689,166 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cdnirene View Post
That's rather a quaint old-fashioned view for the year 2014. It's the wife's home too but you feel that it should be 100% the husband's decision? Heck, the wife may be contributing more to the household expenses than her husband is. You don't know. You also don't know how often the couple may have been overnight guests in MIL's home.
Ok you are right, but since the OP is the one writing here, thats why i addressed him - True - it would be better if the wife and husband made a joint decision together. However, he is the head of the house, so in that way, yes I am old fashioned and quaint

anyway my point is - its their house, NOT the mother in laws house, and I belive the mother in law needs to respect that she is a GUEST in their house, and ought to be respectful and not a complainer.

I told my kids when they were little when they whined "Complainers get nothing!" they stopped whining then.
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Old 07-25-2014, 08:33 AM
 
13,148 posts, read 20,731,948 times
Reputation: 35366
Did the OP ever return to this thread?

There was never any explanation as to why the MIL was visiting. Was it to see/help with, grandchildren? Was it because her daughter missed her? Does she live far away? And, the biggest question, was she invited?

If people want to host guests, then I think there is a certain responsibility to ensure their comfort. In this case, it wouldn't be too difficult to do so with a mattress topper. If it was the OP's mother making the same complaint, I am doubtful it wouldn't be addressed quickly.
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