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Obviously, if it is said in a dismissive or demeaning way that is a different issue. That's not what we were talking about. I've never had anyone said it to me other than as a friendly greeting.
That's your experience, but even if said in that overly saccharine way, in a professional setting it can still be demeaning.
I HATE when random people call me "hon". Like a cashier, for example. I find it so demeaning. I understand that I'm in my late twenties and I probably look a couple years younger than that even, but being called "hon" makes me feel like I'm twelve.
Anybody with me?
no, I don't think is is a big deal and could care less.
I HATE when random people call me "hon". Like a cashier, for example. I find it so demeaning. I understand that I'm in my late twenties and I probably look a couple years younger than that even, but being called "hon" makes me feel like I'm twelve.
Anybody with me?
I was born and raised in Dallas, so I'm used to being called hon, darlin', sweetheart, etc. Now that we have so many out-of-state transplants and foreigners here, it's much less common. I miss it.
Does the person you are paying even KNOW your name? You go to a diner you've never been to and order breakfast. Do they know your name? You're standing in line at a grocery store. Do they know your name?
I've worked in service businesses many times during my life. I NEVER used diminutives with customers. Personally, I don't think it's appropriate. But if someone does it to me I don't waste a millisecond being offended by it. Half of them don't even know they're doing it. And the ones who do probably mean it to be friendly. It's just their way.
The elitist attitude of some of the people here cracks me up. You're spending $20 and you demand respect for your station in life? Perhaps we should revert to "your grace" or "your lordship."
The other thing I've learned here is that everyone seems to expect something different. Some people hate hon, some people are OK with hon but hate ma'am. Some people expect to be called by their name by someone who would have to take time out of serving someone else's coffee to figure it out. So these minimum wage people are supposed to cater to your delicate feelings ... even when they have no idea what they are? It's not easy being a low-wage worker in America today!
Now that made me laugh! lol I have customers that, I swear, would be happy if I did that because they do feel kind of entitled.
Working with the public in customer service for over 50 years I have come to the conclusion that I am "damned if I do and damned if I don't". But I'm pretty good at sizing people up and treat them accordingly. The only customers I will ever call "hon'...and it's not often...are the ones I see all the time. The regulars who come through my line because it's me. Most often I learn their names from their debit/credit cards or checks and, so far, nobody has lambasted me for using a first name or calling them hon. Most of the people I come across don't seem to mind that I actually call them by name. I DON'T call men hon though. Does that make me prejudiced?? Or sexist?? I dunno.
Reading this thread, and a few others around CD make me wonder if I shouldn't just quit my job and find something to do that I don't have to deal with the public. OR, even better, I could just become a robot! A Stepford cashier! Just do my job and that's that. No...then I'd get reported for being unfriendly and cold. See? Can't win! lol
When you're younger you hate "hon," but as you get older you don't mind.
I think that's because when we get older we KNOW what is and isn't really important. Something like this is NOT that important in the long term.
I forgot to mention in my other post that I have been called hon, sweetie, babe, darlin', etc. by my customers. Does it bother me? Nope, not a bit. I always figure they call me those things because they actually LIKE me and not because they are disrespecting me, or whatever. I have never felt talked down to nor would I want my customers to feel that way if I call them hon. I admit I don't do it often but once in a while it'll slip out and I don't call anyone anything else. Words like sweetie, babe, darlin' are reserved for friends and family and even then I don't use them often.
After reading this entire thread though I don't think I'll EVER call ANYONE anything ever again!
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