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But, I think it makes you a stronger and better person in the end.
I think there is more than one way to be stronger and better. If this is the intention, it should be known that is the purpose of the criticism. "I am telling you this so you can be better."
I have thick skin as a result of being heavily criticized but it damaged me in other ways, especially in my ability to form relationships. I thought my job was to make other people better using my own ideas of what was better. Nope. Not my job.
I've always heard it said. The difference between CONSTRUCTIVE criticism and DESTRUCTIVE criticism is:
Constructive criticism is done in private with the intent to help the recipient. Destructive criticism is done in public with the intent to embarrass the recipient.
I had a supervisor once who saw fit to criticize me in front of customers for running in at only 1 minute late. And it wasn't even busy.
Even now there is a jerk in my household who will wait until the rest of the family is gathered together and pick that time to criticize me about trivial, petty things.
I do not take it well. It's a form of conflict which I do not like. I had an upbringing that was very negative and constantly critical so I've had more than my share of that.
I'm glad I currently have a job where there is none of that. I should add pointing out a mistake or making a suggestion is not the same. I'm talking more like outright hostility toward another human being.
I had the same experience growing up and I am very sensitive to it. There is a way of telling someone that you disapprove and it should always be gentle.
I've always heard it said. The difference between CONSTRUCTIVE criticism and DESTRUCTIVE criticism is:
Constructive criticism is done in private with the intent to help the recipient. Destructive criticism is done in public with the intent to embarrass the recipient.
I had a supervisor once who saw fit to criticize me in front of customers for running in at only 1 minute late. And it wasn't even busy.
Even now there is a jerk in my household who will wait until the rest of the family is gathered together and pick that time to criticize me about trivial, petty things.
I agree to a point. If you see fit to be an ass in public, be prepared for a public lashing.
I have been thinking about this thread today because I wondered why we (my family and friends) are careful about criticism. One major reason is that we don't encourage very negative conversations which can begin with criticism.
Usually, when a person wants to criticize me, it is because I have disappointed them in some way and negative feelings begin to surface. Usually, I try to keep the tone of the conversation in check, i.e. discourage negative talk (keep opinions out) and encourage positive talk (stick with acknowledged feelings and facts).
Maybe that is why the delivery of criticism fails for some; they have very negative feelings.
Criticism is an excuse for someone to pick on you.
If you listen it's tacit approval on your part.
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