Friend asks (expects) me to watch her dogs for 3rd time in 3 months. (person, holiday)
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So this could be more of a rant than anything else.
Long story short. I am a cat person. While I love dogs I do not love the high maintenance required.
Have a friend that has started using me for her dog sitting services when she is out of town. First time for 1 night over the memorial weekend holiday, 2nd time last month for 4 nights, her 3rd request is for 6 nights while she goes on a cruise during Labor Day weekend.
Yes she compensates me for my time, but since I'm not a dog person, I really consider the inconvenience to be not worth the $$, and I don't need the extra cash.
I have kindly requested that she only use me as back up, that I would do it only as a favor as a last resort. Now I'm being told her normal dog sitter had backed out, and I know she'll be guilting me into it.
On top of that, I have recently started a new job that required a 6 month probation period which means I can't take time off till November. So I'll be donating my 2nd 3 day weekend to her dogs...
And did I mention I am not a dog person.
Not sure why some people don't realize how imposing they can be, but I can't see myself getting off this doggy duty without alienating her as a friend.
So this could be more of a rant than anything else.
Long story short. I am a cat person. While I love dogs I do not love the high maintenance required.
Have a friend that has started using me for her dog sitting services when she is out of town. First time for 1 night over the memorial weekend holiday, 2nd time last month for 4 nights, her 3rd request is for 6 nights while she goes on a cruise during Labor Day weekend.
Yes she compensates me for my time, but since I'm not a dog person, I really consider the inconvenience to be not worth the $$, and I don't need the extra cash.
I have kindly requested that she only use me as back up, that I would do it only as a favor as a last resort. Now I'm being told her normal dog sitter had backed out, and I know she'll be guilting me into it.
On top of that, I have recently started a new job that required a 6 month probation period which means I can't take time off till November. So I'll be donating my 2nd 3 day weekend to her dogs...
And did I mention I am not a dog person.
Not sure why some people don't realize how imposing they can be, but I can't see myself getting off this doggy duty without alienating her as a friend.
I AM a dog person, but for a while, I was the "go to" person when my cousin needed a dog sitter. He & his family travel a lot, and since I'm such a dog lover, he would ask me to watch his dogs. Not as often as 3 times in 3 months, but that would be the main reason he would contact me. He lives about 15 minutes away, which isn't far, but also, isn't really close. Last winter I got stuck in the snow in his driveway. It was an ordeal to get out of there. I finally had to tell him I could no longer be a dog sitter during the winter months. Also, during the times I was checking on his dogs, I was not with MY blind dog--who was left alone all day while I was at work.
I totally get how hard it is to deny a favor for a friend because we want to help when we can, but this friend is using you. Respect yourself enough to recognize when you are being used. I know, I know, easier said than done. Tell her that she need to take the time to hire a dog sitter before her next trip. She will keep using you until you stand up for yourself.
I agree; just say no. Tell her that you have something to do that weekend and you aren't available. Offer to help her find another, professional, dog sitter. Don't agree to do it if you don't want to because it will breed resentment. I'm sure another dog sitter can be found in time.
Do you travel much? If so, do you have someone check on your cat and feed him and clean his litter box? If so, it seems like it would be reasonable to exchange cat care for dog care.
I don't disagree with the "just say no" concept, but just keep in mind that if you do, you will probably close off any chance that this other person will cat-sit for you.
This sort of situation drives me nuts! Why do so many of us worry about saying no to things we don't want to do, and worry about it ruining a friendship? Where is the friend's worry about ruining the friendship by imposing and assuming that just because you babysat the dog a couple of times, that you're under an obligation to do so forevermore?
Just say no. If she alienates you because of her imposition, she is not someone worth having as a friend.
If she is a friend you can tell her that you do not have the time to dog sit for six nights and she has to make other arrangements such as a professional sitting service, kennel boarding. Learn to say no!
just say no - she is using you and taking advantage of this "friendship" that she conveniently uses to guilt trip you into saying yes.
she might get mad but you cant control that. she might get mad anyway at you for something else. and there goes the friendship anyway. and all that work you did for her, now for nothing. don't worry, there are kennels out there, and she will find a way to house her dog while vacationing in sunny Bermuda while your sitting at home cleaning up dog poop. Nice friend there!
Not sure why some people don't realize how imposing they can be, but I can't see myself getting off this doggy duty without alienating her as a friend.
This woman is not your friend, if she knows you are a cat person and is constantly putting you on doggy duty.
You have to stand firm and be honest. Tell her you are not willing to do it anymore. There are plenty of places people can take their dogs. Sure, we'd all prefer a friend take care of our pets but not at the expense of the relationship.
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