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How? That's that easy to do. What steps do I need to take?
For starters, dial way back on initiating texts, chats, etc., with him. Stop being the sole initiator/inviter of in-person visits. Stop asking him if he's ok with what you're doing; quit seeking his approval.
Don't ask his permission to contact him via FB.
Then it's likely he won't contact me at all. I know many of his other friends have to invite him to hang out and have to talk to him first because he spreads himself so thin and is friends with SO many other people. He's incredibly popular, so I'm sure he only talks to people if they talk to him first.
How? That's that easy to do. What steps do I need to take?
nobody knows this friend like you do,,,if what you have going,,,,you like,,,then keep doing it,,
because you are good friends,,and not more,,,,the head games shouldn't be here,,,no need to back off or away
if you are wanting more,,then maybe you do want more,,
but take a few deep breathes,,and send him over a hi and smile- everyone can use a good friend..
good friends,,,can be just that ,,,friends,,,don't worry about smothering him or saying the wrong thing,,,,
that's why good friends are so special,,,no pressure!!
Then it's likely he won't contact me at all. I know many of his other friends have to invite him to hang out and have to talk to him first because he spreads himself so thin and is friends with SO many other people. He's incredibly popular, so I'm sure he only talks to people if they talk to him first.
Good friends will reach out and make time for you, no matter how popular they are. Friendship is a reciprocal relationship. If you cease reaching out and he doesn't reach back, it is not friendship.
You are at the point of sounding creepy and obsessive. Don't this man have a wife, children of his own that he needs to devote his time to them? The amount of time you demand out of him is not normal. Too possessive, too obsessive to be a healthy friendship.
I don't think it's weird. I like having friends of various ages. I actually think it's weird when grown adults ONLY hang out with people who are close in age. I think they are missing out.
I think it's the opposite, younger folks need to have older friends. Because grown adults do not need young friends. Younger folks may have newer ideas or thinking but in the end it's all about priorities.
Do I enjoy talking to younger people? Sure but not always because I can pick out flaws in their beliefs and thinking patterns right away. It makes it difficult to retain friendships.
Have I learned anything from younger folks today? No, not really. I've seen it all and what young adults do today is just a cycle, nothing has changed that much except kids grow at an accelerated pace and I'm not sure that's a good thing.
Bigger bodies but still fragile young undeveloped mind, dangerous combo.
OP, I tried to scan your posts to see if you said he was married or not. I'll be honest, if I was his wife, I wouldn't want him being friends with you. Now, if he was in his 80s & had a wife & you were like a granddaughter of theirs who can help around the house or go grocery shopping for them sometimes, that would be more acceptable to me. However, with him still being in his 50s, he probably loves that a MUCH younger woman in her 20s is giving him the time of day. If you were holding hands out in public, it would look like the typical May-December relationship with the typical young gal & much older man.
I don't think he thinks of you like a daughter. The feelings he has (whether he's ever told you or not) seem more romantic/sexual. Well, as long as he's not married, I guess it's OK. If he's not married, would you actually want to be in a romantic relationship with him?
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