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Old 08-18-2014, 08:51 PM
 
Location: the sweetest place on earth
54 posts, read 106,817 times
Reputation: 40

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In this day and age it still seems like women can get away with being unemployed (often by choice of laziness) or working very part-time DESPITE not having children or being married. I say this because I JUST graduated from college (double major) and was taking accelerated summer classes that I was striving(and made) straight A's to open more prospects for graduate school and bolster my GPA. A buddy of mine's dad made a comment today that kind of striked a chord but I felt he was kind of judging me when he asked "are you working"? "You need a job,man" to which I told him I've sent out several resumes as well as grad schools(gathering all required materials which is quite a process) so I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing yet. Meanwhile, my sister (in her early 20's, no kids either and was not taking summer courses or have a job besides the occasional babysitting gig did not and does not ever seem to get the same comments or criticism despite pretty much living off her boyfriend (who she doesn't even live with), and my working class mom.

So, from a sociological perspective if you will,despite the modern era of "equality" and women's rights,do you believe the gender stereotypes still hold true that a woman will still be judged less harshly if she doesn't really work and "lives off people" and generally lives a leisurely life on other peoples dim-be it parents, significant other,etc. Even with no kids? What are your thoughts?


PS. I'm not insulting women or trying to cause a dispute as I know there are MANY hard working women juggling multiple jobs,school, raising kids,etc.Im just interested from a sociological perspective as gender roles has always been an area of interest to me.
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Old 08-18-2014, 09:02 PM
 
Location: Lebanon, OH
7,079 posts, read 8,941,070 times
Reputation: 14739
I don't think women can get away with not having a job solely based on your friend's dad's comment, he is disconnected from reality as there are all kinds of college graduates who are struggling in getting a job of any kind in this day and age. My daughter graduated college in 2011 and was one of the lucky ones to be working in her field.
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Old 08-18-2014, 09:05 PM
 
Location: SC
2,966 posts, read 5,216,104 times
Reputation: 6926
I do not have a job or children, and I am not "living off someone." I am not "getting away with something."

My job is spoiling my husband and making sure he is happy, and in return, he does the same for me. When he comes home from work, everything is done and has no added stress or screaming children to deal with.

Like most females, post 1960's I was raised being taught that I must attend college (which I did), work full time, and have children.

Fortunately I was smart enough to see how miserable many women and families became during this post-feminism era. The breakdown of the US family, latch key children, overworked and over stressed moms trying to juggle a career, kids, the debt-trap, and marriage...sorry, but there are not enough hours in the day. Everyone I know who got themselves into this mess complains about how tired and stressed they are all the time.

I call it misery and slavery.
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Old 08-18-2014, 09:26 PM
 
Location: the sweetest place on earth
54 posts, read 106,817 times
Reputation: 40
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bmachina View Post
I do not have a job or children, and I am not "living off someone." I am not "getting away with something."

My job is spoiling my husband and making sure he is happy, and in return, he does the same for me. When he comes home from work, everything is done and has no added stress or screaming children to deal with.

Like most females, post 1960's I was raised being taught that I must attend college (which I did), work full time, and have children.

Fortunately I was smart enough to see how miserable many women and families became during this post-feminism era. The breakdown of the US family, latch key children, overworked and over stressed moms trying to juggle a career, kids, the debt-trap, and marriage...sorry, but there are not enough hours in the day. Everyone I know who got themselves into this mess complains about how tired and stressed they are all the time.

I call it misery and slavery.
BMachina-I do see your point. I noticed a lot of women who fall in to that trap(career,kids,marriage) are very harried compared to their non-working counterparts.
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Old 08-18-2014, 09:32 PM
 
16,825 posts, read 17,726,340 times
Reputation: 20852
Quote:
Originally Posted by globalunit View Post
In this day and age it still seems like women can get away with being unemployed (often by choice of laziness) or working very part-time DESPITE not having children or being married. I say this because I JUST graduated from college (double major) and was taking accelerated summer classes that I was striving(and made) straight A's to open more prospects for graduate school and bolster my GPA. A buddy of mine's dad made a comment today that kind of striked a chord but I felt he was kind of judging me when he asked "are you working"? "You need a job,man" to which I told him I've sent out several resumes as well as grad schools(gathering all required materials which is quite a process) so I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing yet. Meanwhile, my sister (in her early 20's, no kids either and was not taking summer courses or have a job besides the occasional babysitting gig did not and does not ever seem to get the same comments or criticism despite pretty much living off her boyfriend (who she doesn't even live with), and my working class mom.

So, from a sociological perspective if you will,despite the modern era of "equality" and women's rights,do you believe the gender stereotypes still hold true that a woman will still be judged less harshly if she doesn't really work and "lives off people" and generally lives a leisurely life on other peoples dim-be it parents, significant other,etc. Even with no kids? What are your thoughts?


PS. I'm not insulting women or trying to cause a dispute as I know there are MANY hard working women juggling multiple jobs,school, raising kids,etc.Im just interested from a sociological perspective as gender roles has always been an area of interest to me.
Wahhhh. Someone supports your non working, college student, sister it must be society's fault!!
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Old 08-18-2014, 09:34 PM
 
Location: SC
2,966 posts, read 5,216,104 times
Reputation: 6926
Quote:
Originally Posted by globalunit View Post
BMachina-I do see your point. I noticed a lot of women who fall in to that trap(career,kids,marriage) are very harried compared to their non-working counterparts.
Yes, I think of it this way...It's like working 3 full time jobs. Career, raising well-mannered and intelligent children, and trying to keep a household cleaned, maintained and running, finances...the tasks are endless. Where does time to devote to a healthy marriage fit into this picture? I honestly do not know how working women with children do it; I could not do it without a lot of outside help.

I am socially liberal on a lot of issues, but this is where I go against the grain.
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Old 08-18-2014, 09:43 PM
 
16,825 posts, read 17,726,340 times
Reputation: 20852
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bmachina View Post
Yes, I think of it this way...It's like working 3 full time jobs. Career, raising well-mannered and intelligent children, and trying to keep a household cleaned, maintained and running, finances...the tasks are endless. Where does time to devote to a healthy marriage fit into this picture? I honestly do not know how working women with children do it; I could not do it without a lot of outside help.

I am socially liberal on a lot of issues, but this is where I go against the grain.
You said you don't have children. Which is it?

And spare us the Susie homemaker crap, it is one thing to stay home with your kids, but staying home to wash dishes is not a full time job.
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Old 08-18-2014, 10:03 PM
 
2,029 posts, read 4,037,589 times
Reputation: 3399
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
You said you don't have children. Which is it?

And spare us the Susie homemaker crap, it is one thing to stay home with your kids, but staying home to wash dishes is not a full time job.
You sound bitter. And there's a lot more to do than wash dishes. Running a house is a full time job...with or without children. Plus, we are not paid for it.
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Old 08-18-2014, 10:06 PM
 
Location: SC
2,966 posts, read 5,216,104 times
Reputation: 6926
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
You said you don't have children. Which is it?

And spare us the Susie homemaker crap, it is one thing to stay home with your kids, but staying home to wash dishes is not a full time job.
Why the hostile attitude? Like I said, I stay at home and I do not have children. For some reason women who lead a quality life outside of career and children incite a lot of hatred and jealously and judgement in people.

When we both worked full time, and I had to run a business, we were both stressed all the time and had to hire outside help and a housekeeper because there are not enough hours in the day to get things done.
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Old 08-18-2014, 10:36 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,202 posts, read 107,842,460 times
Reputation: 116113
There's less pressure on women, especially from old-fashioned parents, but this is to women's detriment. If everyone had the same expectations of women as they do of men, career-wise, more women would be working on building their resumes and at earlier ages than is the case now. Letting women "get away with" slacking doesn't do them any favors. But many parents do instill their daughters with the idea that nobody's going to give them a free ride, so they'd better prepare well to take care of themselves.
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