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Old 08-25-2014, 09:59 PM
 
Location: Georgia, USA
5 posts, read 4,151 times
Reputation: 10

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ashleynj View Post
I am sure you care about your friend and are looking out for her (I guess), but it also sounds like you view this guy as some crazy competition, and are more concerned about the fact she is "choosing" you over him than the fact that your friend might be in danger.
If your friend does not like him and thinks he is creepy, then why would there even be a choice to be made? Your story just doesn't make sense, sorry.
No. There's no competition. I'm not about to compete over a friendship.

My friend is too nice to tell him off. That's why we argue.
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Old 08-25-2014, 09:59 PM
 
7,363 posts, read 13,188,326 times
Reputation: 8940
Quote:
Originally Posted by jarrett178 View Post
No, I didn't say that. I just wondered why he was threatened.
If you want to understand the mind of a stalker, then take a psychology class.
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Old 08-25-2014, 10:06 PM
 
7,363 posts, read 13,188,326 times
Reputation: 8940
Quote:
Originally Posted by jarrett178 View Post
No. There's no competition. I'm not about to compete over a friendship.

My friend is too nice to tell him off. That's why we argue.
Then she's not doing herself any favors. Stalking is scary as hell, I've watched a couple of my friends get terrorized. If your friend isn't going to take this seriously.... There's actually nothing you can do, but to direct her to educate herself.
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Old 08-25-2014, 10:10 PM
 
1,728 posts, read 1,326,324 times
Reputation: 1079
I had a stalker, they do not go away easily. It is not something to ignore, trust me.
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Old 08-25-2014, 11:14 PM
 
7,496 posts, read 9,726,980 times
Reputation: 7394
You need to back off a tad and just realize that only she can do what's right for her, even if it means getting your cousin to leave her alone. He sounds crazy though.
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Old 08-26-2014, 08:03 AM
 
Location: Groveland, FL
1,279 posts, read 2,111,058 times
Reputation: 1776
Based on his erratic behavior and comments, he sounds potentially dangerous. Strongly encourage your friend to get a restraining order as Inkpoe suggested.
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Old 08-26-2014, 10:02 AM
 
51,721 posts, read 41,651,968 times
Reputation: 32292
Quote:
Originally Posted by ashleynj View Post
I am sure you care about your friend and are looking out for her (I guess), but it also sounds like you view this guy as some crazy competition, and are more concerned about the fact she is "choosing" you over him than the fact that your friend might be in danger.
If your friend does not like him and thinks he is creepy, then why would there even be a choice to be made? Your story just doesn't make sense, sorry.
^^^^This.

We aren't getting the full story or the OP isn't getting the full story.

She thinks he's creepy yet it seems she hangs out with him.
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Old 08-26-2014, 12:51 PM
 
Location: The Greater Houston Metro Area
8,985 posts, read 14,636,676 times
Reputation: 14868
I am not sure that she only has one stalker.
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Old 08-26-2014, 01:15 PM
 
Location: New Albany, IN
832 posts, read 1,373,923 times
Reputation: 1136
Default creepy stalkers!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ashleynj View Post
I had a stalker, they do not go away easily. It is not something to ignore, trust me.
You are absolutely right. "Ignoring him" makes him angrier and more persistent. That's what I've seen happen.

Quote:
Originally Posted by poodlestix View Post
Based on his erratic behavior and comments, he sounds potentially dangerous. Strongly encourage your friend to get a restraining order as Inkpoe suggested.
Everyone needs to look into what standard is necessary to "get a restraining order" in his/her jurisdiction. "Restraining order" is a common answer to these problems but the public needs to know it's not that easy to get one placed. For example if the young man is attending college at the same campus as the OP's friend, then he has a reason to be on campus and it is very difficult to prove that he is truly coming over just to stalk her. Most stalker tactics are not illegal, so they are able to continue.
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Old 08-26-2014, 09:18 PM
 
Location: Purgatory
6,322 posts, read 4,740,538 times
Reputation: 9764
Quote:
Originally Posted by jarrett178 View Post
Why is he threatened by me, though? I'm the closest one to her. She told me not to back off. She likes that I look out for her. My best friend is attractive, but I've never been attracted to her. Plus she dates my cousin.
C'MON! If i really need to spell it out for you: it is because you have (emotional) intimacy on a level that he doesn't. He wants that. And he wants her body which is closer to you than to him even if not sexually.

And she told you NOT to back off? Why are you even bringing up her attractiveness?

My intuition tells me that there is a two way "pseudo-crush" going on w u and bff and that maybe you want to hear he's threatened because she likes you. Maybe she does. Or maybe she just wants a "back up." This is someone who will be protective and fawn all over her may even be attractive but she doesn't really "like-like." He supplies all the emotional support needed that others can't provide. It is common for pretty chicks to have these types of relationships w "the nice guy." Some grow out of it. Some do not.
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