U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 09-27-2014, 03:11 AM
 
1,882 posts, read 2,830,791 times
Reputation: 3876

Advertisements

I had a friend just like this, growing up. It was terrible. She told the STUPIDEST lies- like how she was addicted to drugs and thrown in youth detention and so on, and none of it was true. She always used her lies to build herself up to whatever level she thought she should be- I remember one lie she told on and on was how she would ride her bike through NYC. HA! its like how many boroughs, and she's talking about it like its a city with one Main Street.
Later on her lies got more outlandish. As in, adulthood. She would lie about meeting Paul McCartney. When 911 happened, she went on and on about how she was "lucky" she wasn't there that day because her company's home office was near the WTC. Actually it was in Secaucus, NJ. Stuff like that.

Eventually I cut the bag loose. She was also a bigot and a sociopath- and the only reason we had remained friends were so long was because we had known each other as teens and all our other friends were either dead or in jail. Some grim glue, but eventually I got tired of her racist harangues and strange far-right proclivities. The straw that broke the camel's back was when she asked me on a long road trip if I had ever fantasized about killing anyone. "For fun". To this day, I half expect to see her on the news at some point. Girl ain't right.
Liars are all sorts, but some of em are just evil with a sunny disguise.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 09-27-2014, 08:00 AM
 
Location: Southwestern, USA
15,154 posts, read 12,008,996 times
Reputation: 16544
Quote:
Originally Posted by el_marto View Post
Why don't you just treat it like a spectator sport?
It must be fascinating, getting a voyeuristic look at such a psychological wreck...
I like this idea, too.

Off topic a little...
My life seems like a spectator sport...boy, do I ever have less problems being detached...
not taking things personally...realizing
the other person has their baggage...and it isn't about 'me'. Whew,
so much less drama and emotions!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-27-2014, 09:16 AM
 
Location: Maryland not Murlin
8,192 posts, read 22,279,482 times
Reputation: 6153
Quote:
Originally Posted by diddlydudette View Post

Would you start calling her out or just let her continue? How would you handle it? My thinking is that it will never change and maybe calling her out on it is a waste of time and just let her talk and be proud of her make-belief stories.
If I were in this situation I would wait until after she told a fresh lie, then pull her aside the second we had privacy and ask her why she told the lie. I would not be confrontational, as that might cause her to become defensive--which would defeat the purpose, but yet I would be straight-forward and stern. I would also not become accusational over what-ever her answer might be but would let her know that her lying is not acceptable.


People develop these types of habits because few people, if any, call them on it; usually because they have no reason to believe they are being lied to. Generally, the liar tends to feel crafty with their deceptions. You are correct, she may never stop with the lying. In the extreme case she may feel the need to up her game. If this happens her lies will become so outrageous that few will believe their plausibility. Her house of cards will crumble. If she knows that you are on to her, however, she may avoid lying in your presence or avoid your presence altogether. In essence, she's quite possibly lying because she knows she can get away with it.

It is never a waste of time to confront a liar, just do not go into it with the mind-set of putting her in her place. It is not a win-lose situation and if you approach it as one it will turn into a lose-lose situation.

Good luck
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-27-2014, 12:21 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
24,755 posts, read 23,712,888 times
Reputation: 30464
I wouldn't bother saying anything... unless you really want to. It's your call. You need to take a step back and not allow this person to annoy you. You know she lies; ignore her.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-27-2014, 12:42 PM
 
726 posts, read 697,162 times
Reputation: 1718
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn View Post
I like this idea, too.

Off topic a little...
My life seems like a spectator sport...boy, do I ever have less problems being detached...
not taking things personally...realizing
the other person has their baggage...and it isn't about 'me'. Whew,
so much less drama and emotions!
Indeed. I have one friend like this, a liar (if not a particularly prolific one), and it is entertaining to just sit back and let it happen - but it's also not enjoyable if you're only talking one-on-one because then you have to play along; it becomes an effort on your part.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-28-2014, 09:10 AM
 
2,407 posts, read 3,493,927 times
Reputation: 1831
Looking back on when I first met her, she told me she was dating this one guy and they went on vacation to Bahamas or somewhere. She said her boyfriend hired a body guard for her while she went on the beach. lol

Even then I looked at her and asked why in the world would she need a body guard????? That made no sense unless she is a ultra movie star or is on someone's hit list. lol If some guy is hiring you a body guard and you aren't either of those, then that's a huge red flag that he's crazy.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-07-2014, 08:56 PM
 
731 posts, read 1,369,719 times
Reputation: 674
Default People you know that exagerate or lie

I can't stand lies. If someone lies then they will cheat, steal, and stab you in the back. I should say that has been my experience with a liar. My son had a girlfriend who was a pathological liar. She lied to hurt people as much as lied about things that didn't matter. I tried to overlook her lies as he believed her way too many times. Finally, I just would tell him that what she had said was a lie. He would look at me like why do think that. He loved her a lot. She was mostly just getting what she wanted from him.
He had even pointed out that he would catch her in a lie and she would lie again to cover up that lie.
They finally parted and now he finally sees her for what she is and how her lies caused him grief for two years.


You can never deal with lies because there is nothing real to deal with. If I know someone is a liar, I try to stay away from them because they are up to no good.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:37 PM.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top