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I am going to have a sisters night out type tomorrow thing and buy her dinner. Just a night we can talk. I did not want to come across as unaccepting or homophobic, sorry if I did. It was just unexpected because throughout high school she has always liked guys.
The reason I am disappointed is because I know it will cause family drama. I am disappointed in her because she didnt feel comfortable enough to tell me, at least. My family is close minded and dont support gay marriage. I am the only family member who knows, but our mom has made it clear she thinks being gay is a sin, and she told us if she ever had a gay child or a daughter that has a black boyfriend she will disown us. My dad always makes fun of gay people. I will support her, but I am just so sad she has to keep her secret from the rest of our family.
Bunch of real winners you have there. Ignorance is a choice, remember.
I am going to have a sisters night out type tomorrow thing and buy her dinner. Just a night we can talk. I did not want to come across as unaccepting or homophobic, sorry if I did. It was just unexpected because throughout high school she has always liked guys.
I am sure she still does, and could easily fall in love with the right guy as the right gal. Let the lady love who she wants to and stop making this about being "gay" or "sinful" and such nonsense. Be happy for her.
The reason I am disappointed is because I know it will cause family drama. I am disappointed in her because she didnt feel comfortable enough to tell me, at least. My family is close minded and dont support gay marriage. I am the only family member who knows, but our mom has made it clear she thinks being gay is a sin, and she told us if she ever had a gay child or a daughter that has a black boyfriend she will disown us. My dad always makes fun of gay people. I will support her, but I am just so sad she has to keep her secret from the rest of our family.
That's so sad. Disowning your own child just because they are gay or date someone of a different race is really scraping the bottom of the barrel. Often parents who say this sort of thing will change their tune when it becomes reality and is no longer merely a hypothetical. If they don't, then she's better off without them in her life anyway. With that being said, if she's only 19, she may still be dependent on them and it might be wise to delay telling them.
She can't change who she is. Being disappointed in her because she didn't tell you is very different from being disappointed in her because it could cause family drama. You need to figure out how you feel about this.
I agree with Albert the Crocodile, you are in no position to be explaining anything to your sister, you have a lot to learn. I know, my stepdaughter is gay, I had to learn a lot about the subject, still am learning. It was not in my family, we hadn't spoken about it before. My stepdaughter is a lovely human being, I'm happy she's found happiness because she was very lonely and extremely troubled before she came out to my wife.
A lot of gay people suffer from their families rejection of them. There's too much suicides and violence toward young gay people. We didn't want that road for our daughter. You don't want your sister to live unsafe, insecure, feeling abandoned by her family. Let her feel that she can talk to you. Get yourself ready to listen to her. If she found someone to really love her thats a good thing, hard for anyone to find.
My sister and this girl are both 19. I am just shocked, and really just not comfortable with it. Turns out my sisters bestfriend is actually her girlfriend. But they are both girly though? Are girly lesbians common? I thought most lesbians were butch/manly? Anyways, Im disappointed in her and I think this a just a bad phase shes going through. How do I explain this to her?
/me checks the calendar
Hey, it's 2014. Homophobia and bigotry are so 20th century. Be happy your sister has found love and keep your judgment, hate, and fear to yourself.
That's cool. I like hot lesbians but not the ugly, man hating bull dykes. They are mean and always in a bad mood. Be happy your sister is not one of those.
I am sure she still does, and could easily fall in love with the right guy as the right gal. Let the lady love who she wants to and stop making this about being "gay" or "sinful" and such nonsense. Be happy for her.
Just because she went out with guys in high school doesn't mean she LIKED them, or liked them enough to continue anyway. I know a guy who was married, had kids, the whole 9 yards...Now he's divorced and having a great time the past year....with GUYS - not a single woman has he gone out with. Will he marry another woman at some point? Maybe, but past behavior doesn't always predict future behavior.
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Not Easy But You Must
Anyways, Im disappointed in her and I think this a just a bad phase shes going through. How do I explain this to her?