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Old 10-15-2014, 04:54 PM
4 posts, read 4,518 times
Reputation: 25


I just found out I'm pregnant a few weeks ago. I'm 21 and a senior in college. My boyfriend and I want to keep the baby and we are telling our families this weekend. What is the best way of telling them? I dont know if I'm supposed to sound apologetic or not since I am an adult but I know the timing is off since I haven't graduated yet.
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Old 10-15-2014, 05:00 PM
Location: Dallas TX
15,033 posts, read 21,763,471 times
Reputation: 22250
That age is tough for both you and your parents. You and your boyfriend should sit down with your parents and tell them. Are you happy? Be happy! Let your parents know you and your boyfriend are excited!! This will be a learning curve for both of you. Congratulations!
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Old 10-15-2014, 05:02 PM
Location: Back at home in western Washington!
1,490 posts, read 3,951,575 times
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I would make sure you have your ducks in a row before talking to them...

*Living arrangements?
*Can you / will you be able to finish school before the baby comes?
*Do either of you have jobs to support the baby?

Think of all the hard questions that may be asked of you and have your answers ready. A surprise pregnancy is much easier to accept and be happy about if there is a plan in place and you aren't just coming at them with "I'm pregnant and we'll see what happens".
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Old 10-15-2014, 05:03 PM
Location: Dallas, TX and Las Vegas, NV
5,701 posts, read 4,431,692 times
Reputation: 11715
Are you getting married? If so, say that first.
Are you getting engaged, at least? Say that first!

Your parents will likely have more questions about the stability of the relationship than your pregnancy, so I suggest you sit down with them together and discuss the nature of your relationship and then how you plan to parent the child.
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Old 10-15-2014, 05:12 PM
13,174 posts, read 20,812,406 times
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No need to be apologetic. In fact, refuse to be.

But, yes, as the others have said, have the answers before the questions are asked.
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Old 10-15-2014, 05:16 PM
894 posts, read 840,626 times
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How long have you and your boyfriend been together? It it's only been a short while, prepare for your folks to flip.
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Old 10-15-2014, 09:51 PM
Location: 60630
12,254 posts, read 18,016,458 times
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Do you live at home? You and your bf needs to figure out how to support your baby and where you are all going to live when the baby is born. Once you know all this you can tell your families.

Congratulation on the addition It's fun to be a mom!
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Old 10-15-2014, 10:16 PM
Location: Santa Monica, Ca
6,914 posts, read 3,851,187 times
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Congrats! Hope all goes well with the folks.
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Old 10-15-2014, 10:18 PM
Location: Eastern PA
1,263 posts, read 4,397,326 times
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Congratulations! I had a similar issue at 21, very unexpected, although I just had finished my Associate's Degree and luckily had full-time employment already.

Definitely plan to speak with your parents together with your boyfriend and, like the previous posters mentioned, be ready to answer some questions. Also check into your health insurance requirements/guidelines and be prepared for how your baby is going to be insured when he/she is born. Definitely think through living arrangements, what you will do for income, etc. The more prepared you are, the easier it should be to have this conversation. I wish you lots of luck! Having a baby at 22 snapped me into mature adulthood very quickly and, looking back, was a great experience, although it was much easier having my subsequent children at 30 and 35, I will say. Lots of luck!
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Old 10-16-2014, 12:24 AM
18,370 posts, read 23,552,009 times
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lots of good advice in the answers so far!!

this is what i'd suggest- this is a time to be an adult, to be YOU, to be forth-right-

tell your parents in a "this is the way it is " voice that you are pregnant - "we have some major decisions to make with (name of boyfriend, make sure its a united front)
1. we can abort
2. we can adopt
3. I will quit school, have the child
4. 1/we will finish college and have the child, make the best of this situation- BOTH of us!! HE will be a responsible dad

then tell them both you and he decided on number 4 and hope you get the support from both families

you maturely, and confidently set this up- that number 4 is the most reasonable choice, (if that's what you want)

once number 4 is established as the right choice- then you can talk about living situations and marriage, etc,
but firstly have the mindset, this is a blessing, not a mistake, you aren't 17

use the "we" not the "I" this establishes its a united front from you and the father

and after you tell them, make short time of being there, don't expect them to hug and congratulate you
it will take some time to sink in for them,
keep your head up=YOU ARE NOT SEEKING THERE APPROVAL , be mature, and confident-be very "matter of fact"

if you get the 100 questions, don't say "i don't know" say " WE will have to figure it out" or "WE have yet to make that decision"

good luck and congrats- being a parent is a blessing, (the love you have for this child will give you enough strength to take on any challenge, )

if all pregnancies were planned, half of us wouldn't be here
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