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Old 11-02-2014, 04:37 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,335 posts, read 17,364,497 times
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When people from back home talk to me, it's often to vent their sorrows and frustrations. Outside of my immediate family, I am thinking of telling these folks I no longer want to hear it and quit talking to me. Have you ever just cut out a large amount of people from your life and moved on?
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Old 11-02-2014, 04:58 PM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
5,083 posts, read 5,349,148 times
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No, I haven't.

Judging from your many posts about the folks from your hometown, you have nothing but contempt for them. Perhaps you and them would benefit from a "break up".
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Old 11-02-2014, 05:10 PM
 
4,787 posts, read 9,250,582 times
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I haven't either.

I do agree with the above poster about your attitude toward people from your old home town. It does seem severe to tell them to quit talking to you . Perhaps it might be better to slowly slip out of their lives. Respond to texts, emails, phone calls, etc. very, very slowly. Over a period of months, just back away from them and cease contact. No need to be in your face rude about it.
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Old 11-02-2014, 05:15 PM
 
35,121 posts, read 40,004,782 times
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If you move away and don't leave a forwarding address and change your email and cell phone numbers and get an unlisted house phone (if you get one) no one can contact you anyway.
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Old 11-02-2014, 05:18 PM
 
587 posts, read 701,778 times
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Yes, I've cut out a lot of people all at once-- generally for the sort of reason you are alluding to. I realize that the relationship has devolved to the point where I am just providing narcissist supply. They don't care about me or anything I'm doing - they just want me to listen. I think that when you finally notice that one person is doing this, you suddenly see that you've been letting four or five people get away with it.

I don't burn any bridges, but I just stop making myself available for those kinds of conversations.
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Old 11-02-2014, 09:53 PM
 
4,054 posts, read 3,072,069 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Emigrations View Post
When people from back home talk to me, it's often to vent their sorrows and frustrations. Outside of my immediate family, I am thinking of telling these folks I no longer want to hear it and quit talking to me. Have you ever just cut out a large amount of people from your life and moved on?
Yes I did this but at the time it was unintentional. It took place before the advent of cell phones, email and the internet. My parents moved away from my hometown about one year after my high school graduation. I had no idea what my new address or land-line phone number was going to be so I shared no contact information with anyone I knew from that town. I guess the similarity with your situation is that I could reconnect with people if I wanted to but I have no desire to do such a thing. Effectively I have cut them out of my life, only without any forethought.
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Old 11-03-2014, 12:08 AM
 
Location: The Netherlands
4,294 posts, read 3,062,795 times
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No I haven't. If some one wants to share there sorrow or problems with me that is fine. I am willing to listen and willing to give moral support if needed. That is call being human.
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Old 11-04-2014, 08:59 AM
 
Location: DFW
6,794 posts, read 11,723,975 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Emigrations View Post
When people from back home talk to me, it's often to vent their sorrows and frustrations. Outside of my immediate family, I am thinking of telling these folks I no longer want to hear it and quit talking to me. Have you ever just cut out a large amount of people from your life and moved on?
No, but I did with everyone from high school after I went to college in another state.
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Old 11-04-2014, 11:24 AM
 
Location: Colorado
11,640 posts, read 7,203,216 times
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Yep. I went to 4 different high schools and have lived for years at a stretch in five different states since then. I've started over many times, and sometimes reinvented myself a bit when I did (although that was back in the high school days, as an adult I am fairly solid in my self.) I was ready to leave WA when the military moved us because I had multiple friends who made me feel taken advantage of. I am a generous person, and I give voluntarily to people I care about, sometimes. But I don't like it when they begin to view me as a resource and become demanding, or just show up and TAKE. So I felt it was good to leave and move on. I have had little contact with most of the people I knew there.

Usually when I move away, I don't have to consciously decide to cut people from my life, it just sort of happens. I don't call them, they don't call me. *shrug* I still have 'em on Facebook but that's about it.
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Old 11-04-2014, 02:03 PM
 
Location: Arizona
5,904 posts, read 5,255,297 times
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Sure.

It wasn't intentional. I moved. I keep in contact with 3, 2 of them related. 2 of them 85+.

If you ignore them they will slowly fade away. You don't have to say anything.
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