U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 11-05-2014, 04:33 PM
 
2,765 posts, read 3,340,195 times
Reputation: 5480

Advertisements

This sounds like the making of one of those where the wedding is still being paid for 5 years after the divorce. lol

I have always had a bit of a problem with the fact that members of the wedding party are expected to pay for their dresses, tux rentals or whatever. Heck it isn't my wedding.....it is yours so you pay for it or don't ask me to be in it. I don't travel for weddings either. If you want to have your wedding on the beach in Antigua, knock yourself out but I won't be there. Same goes for having it at Disney World. I love the place and can't get enough of it and if you have your wedding there and I do happen to make it down......don't be surprised if I miss the wedding because I am busy riding Pirates of the Caribbean and Haunted Mansion.

Seriously though, I wouldn't travel more than a couple of hours for a wedding. I would say I would not even do it for my own daughter but she would not be so inconsiderate as to inconvenience all of her friends and family like that so I don't have to worry about it happening.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 11-05-2014, 04:42 PM
 
Location: here
24,839 posts, read 30,124,215 times
Reputation: 32406
Quote:
Originally Posted by charolastra00 View Post
Yes - in the town where the bride and groom live. For most guests, that means they will need to travel. The OP said that her family is scattered - many of them would need to get on a plane anyway. Why does it matter where the destination is if most of the guests are already traveling?

Staying at Disney is expensive, but you can get a hotel in Orlando for dirt cheap. When it comes time for me to get married, most of my guests will be out a lot more money here in the Boston area even at the cheapest. I'm the only family member on my brother's side to be able to drive to his wedding - the rest of the family, half of her family, and my brother's friends will have high hotel and flight costs going to Maine at the peak of tourist season.
The OP's situation, and destination weddings in general tell me that

A) the bride (or couple) doesn't want many people there or

B) the bride (or couple) is so self-centered that she doesn't realize that not everyone can or wants to invest that much time and money in their wedding.

C) the location, scenery, Mickey Mouse, etc. is more important to the bride (or couple) than their friends and family's inconvenience. '

The OP seems clueless as to why her future in-laws aren't chomping at the bit to fly to Disney World. She needs to take a step back and think about it from other people's perspective.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-05-2014, 06:12 PM
 
Location: Wartrace,TN
5,562 posts, read 8,914,467 times
Reputation: 11076
Sounds like people are objecting to the expense required to attend your wedding. Airline tickets, hotel rooms and having to use up vacation time possibly. Unless you are paying their way it is a huge unexpected expense for them.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-05-2014, 06:41 PM
 
10,604 posts, read 14,223,064 times
Reputation: 17203
I fail to see what the in law family actually did wrong.

Giving their opinion to THEIR SON is quite NORMAL. And sharing it with his wife who is the one demanding the extravaganza isn't so weird.

I hope you offered to pay ALL OF THEIR EXPENSES for this monumental event. If not, I wouldn't even attend if it were me.

If you're not self confident enough to ignore a little "negativity" then IMO you're not mature enough to be getting married. It's very simple to say "Oh, thanks for your input" with a smile.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-05-2014, 10:01 PM
 
Location: Leaving fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada
3,862 posts, read 6,879,934 times
Reputation: 7349
Quote:
I'm not proud of this but when we were 22 it really didn't sink in to either of us that almost all of our aunts and uncles showed up to our wedding and that mine had made the effort to drive six or seven hours to be there. T and I were focused on each other and I'm sure we didn't interact with any of them much at all. I see the other side of things now and wish I'd realized and acted differently.
My stepdaughter greeted none of her guests, didn't even say hello to guests who flew across 2 time zones to be there. I was mortified. . .why are brides like this? Her entire wedding was riddled with things that made her look selfish; (just 1 example: sitter that my husband paid for so fiance's dog could attend!).

I am glad you relected on your wedding and feel differently now. Do you think my stepdaughter will do so someday? What about the OP?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-05-2014, 10:40 PM
 
6,997 posts, read 3,884,259 times
Reputation: 14902
Where has she gone?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-05-2014, 11:16 PM
 
Location: NYC
1,723 posts, read 3,379,754 times
Reputation: 2884
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
Great point. One cannot accept without feeling somehow a charity case.
Exactly.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-05-2014, 11:45 PM
 
Location: Santa Cruz
698 posts, read 644,627 times
Reputation: 718
Quote:
Originally Posted by stevek64 View Post
ha!

Ladies and gentleman, please send all contributions to.....
lol!!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-05-2014, 11:48 PM
 
Location: NYC
1,723 posts, read 3,379,754 times
Reputation: 2884
Quote:
Originally Posted by kokonutty View Post
Where has she gone?
Probably out with Prince Charming picking out wedding favors.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-06-2014, 12:16 AM
 
894 posts, read 840,752 times
Reputation: 2633
Here's my thing: You might not have a problem spending a ton of money on a Disney wedding, but have you given any thought as to how much it will cost your guests?

They must arrange time off from work, pay for flights, rental cars, hotels, food, and incidentals, not to mention the cost of a wedding gift. That will add up very fast, especially for families with two or three kids. Precisely the reason why I hate destination weddings and why, quite honestly, I'd be p*ssed if one of my relatives or in-laws went that route.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top