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I'm not sure if this is the right category, but it seems to be the only one close. Anyway.....
Last night, I again had something happen to me that seems to be becoming a common occurrence. I had dinner at a Mexican restaurant. The "waitress" took my order, but someone else brought my meal and beverage (including refill) to the table. The "waitress" was nowhere to be found until she came by with my check. Then, to add to her already poor service, when I handed her a twenty for a $14 check, she asked if I wanted change!!!!! (I'm going to give her a $6 tip for a $14 meal which she never even checked on????)
Sorry.....but if you ask for a tip, you don't get one.
I usually tip 20% without thinking about it. In this case, I may have tipped less, because she was a terrible server. However, when she asked for a tip, she automatically removed any chance she had of getting one.
I have had people ask for tips as waitresses, delivering food, and at the car wash. Do people really think that this benefits them?????
She was not asking for a tip.
She was asking if you wanted change.
Truly.
She punched in ..."Total table 8" and didn't even look at the amount...
it could have been $19. 37 for all she knew...she is thinking about
"Why isn't Table 9's order up?"
Yep X 3. That wasn't a request for a tip. And like Miss Hepburn said, I doubt she was even paying attention to the amount of the bill.
And I'm not trying to be a jerk or anything, but I wonder if dining out is really your thing if you're this sensitive about a simple question asked by your server.
Don't be naive. She knew what the table amount was and she was hoping to put him on the spot and rather than look cheap he would just say no. They teach servers this and if he said yes she would have brought him back six $1's.
Having worked in the food industry years ago, I can tell you it is common that one server will take an order and some one else will deliver it to the table. It just depends on job responsibilities and how a restaurant structures the tasks of workers. In instances such as you describe the primary person (the order taker) often splits tips with the other person (the food delivery person). It's kind of like a hair salon that employs stylists and shampooers.
Don't be naive. She knew what the table amount was and she was hoping to put him on the spot and rather than look cheap he would just say no. They teach servers this and if he said yes she would have brought him back six $1's.
I agree with this. I have heard them say it but on rare occasion. Normally when I pay with cash the server will say something like "Ill be right back with your change" at which point I would say no change or keep the change if the change was a reasonable amount for the tip.
I once had a hair dresser once who just boldly kept my change with out saying a word when I paid for the hair cut. Never went back to her.
She was not asking for a tip.
She was asking if you wanted change.
Truly.
She punched in ..."Total table 8" and didn't even look at the amount...
it could have been $19. 37 for all she knew...she is thinking about
"Why isn't Table 9's order up?"
Oh, no, she WAS asking for a tip ! Most servers will take your money, look at the bill, and say "I will be right back with your change." That gives you the opportunity to say "No, keep the change." When a server asks if you want any change they are putting you in the position of having to say "yes" which is awkward, because it sort of makes you look cheap.
I too hate servers who ask if I want the change, bring me the change and I will decide how much your service was worth. Make no mistake about it, when some servers do this is is a way they have found to increase the tip.
When a server asks if you want any change they are putting you in the position of having to say "yes" which is awkward, because it sort of makes you look cheap.
If I'm asked that question and I do want change, I don't find it the least bit awkward to say "yes". I also don't think that makes me look cheap. That's probably because I don't presume the difference is going to be their tip. Sometimes, I want to give them a tip that is MORE than the change. But I want the change because I need $1 bills for some reason. Maybe I need quarters to add to the parking meter. There are lots of reasons people want their change, only one of them is because that would be more than the tip they intend to leave.
Honestly, I think people read way WAY too much into a simple question. No one can "make you feel" anything. Just answer the question then give the tip you want to give. If you're walking away "feeling cheap", that's on you, not your server.
As a former restaurant owner and operator for 16 years, I did NOT allow my servers to ask that question because, yes, it IS in effect asking for a tip. If a customer hands over the money and says something unprompted along the lines of, "Thank you, that's good", fine. Otherwise you cash out the customer and hand back the change - and in many cases the customer will not only leave the change as a tip but add to it ...
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