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Today I went into work at my library job and started emptying the book box. I wasn't in on Friday (I went into work on Thursday instead) because I had an interview for a 2nd job. Well, the book box was full and I noticed someone dug through it and created an avalanche. I had my phone to take a picture to show my boss because someone did something wrong over the weekend.
Every few weeks a money truck comes into the place I work. The library is within a township building. The one that always sits shot gun in the truck is the one that goes in the building. He always talks to me when he sees me. It's innocuous, except the last time I saw him a few weeks ago (refer to: Some funny thoughts).
So today I was sifting through the mess and he starts talking to me after delivering the money. It was innocent enough - he asked me what else I did besides the library. I said I was a writer. He starts getting more personal, I'm not really answering because I don't want to tell this guy any more than I'm a writer, and then my boss comes in. I'm glad for that because I wanted to break conversation and I asked her something. However, she answered my question and walked away. The guy then asks me for my phone number. I told him no. He just said, "Oh c'mon. I want your number." I told him no. I told him no three more times and said I don't give out my number to people. He proceeded to give me his number. I took out my phone like I was typing it and said I got it. I didn't write it down... but he thought I did and he left.
When I got done book box duty my boss asked me what happened. I told her and she said, "Yeah, I'm glad you said no. I'm glad you finally learned to say no. Although he works for security, that doesn't mean he's without issues. And it was very strange, especially since you told him no three times." I replied to her and my other older co-worker (that co-worker is 75), "I've learned in the past 6 months that if someone can't take no as an answer, they don't have my best interest in mind. I'm very leery of people who can't take no for an answer." They just shook their heads, though the older one said: "not always. Some are just persistent. However, if they're acting strange, that's true."
I just don't understand why men can't take no as an answer. :\
I can't understand why women have to project that judgemental opinions/OCD/issues onto others. So I guess we are in the same boat.
I'm not being judgmental or OCD or whatever, I am not interested and I told him that. I don't know why he was being so dang pushy. A few weeks ago he touched my hair.
You could have ended the post with that. I didn't even bother to read anything else. Hell, I don't understand them either. I swear on EVERYTHING I will understand the mind of a dog or a cat before I will understand why men do the things they do.
I don't have anything of value to add to this post, just had to get that off my chest. Carry on.
Some are too pushy and don't respect your wishes
Some are too reluctant and would rather do dishes
Some are too full of themselves and have high expectations
Others are more reserved and need a boost from libations
Some are maybe traumatized from too much rejection
Some are over sold on things to do for a reaction
Some are simply emotionally unintelligent
Others may prefer to write you a poem like a noble gent
Good luck in your pursuit of what makes you happy and comfortable and do be always mindful of your inner voice / gut. Also, take some self defense for your own common sense of protection and being able to recognize odd behaviors. If you are how I picture you - from what you've described as a slow maturation ugly duckling in formative years - you likely have a lot of additional character qualities that enhance your beauty - don't let fools use you. You seem a wise woman.
The same reason some women can't take no for an answer.
I am glad you stood your ground and did not give out your number however, in the future you may want to keep a different number "handy" just in case.
You can use:
Dial A Prayer
Dial A Escort
Dial A Pizza Delivery
Dial A Donkey Anonymous..........etc, etc.
Haha. I like that. I usually give out a completely different number than my real one to a pushy guy like that. Or, if I'm feeling particularly irritable, I don't give him a number at all and just tell him, "No means no. I'm not interested in you."
I think the OP did the right thing. And, after she had had a bad experience with a guy who pressured her to drink too much, she should know.
There are men who are controllers. They want to get their way, and they will override the woman if possible. So, the guy might be one of these types; he insists she give him her phone number, even when she says no. If she does give him the number, then he will pester her, or overwhelm her with attention, or be obnoxious. If he is one of those types. I think she should trust her gut on this. And I am glad she posted about her experience.
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