Family torn apart when estate is divvied up

[fluffythewondercat]

Originally Posted by Inkpoe

And the money? Holy crap. My husband and his full blooded brother got their dad's portion of the grandma's estate and trust fund... And the half siblings almost started WWIII because they thought they should get a piece too. Its why my husband disowned his elder sister.

I don't understand. Didn't your husband's step-siblings have their own father? Why would they think they were due anything at all?

[DragonflyMom]

Some people have no class and don't even know how to act decent when a family member dies. We cared for my mother-in-law for over 20 years while she lived in our house and we supported her financially. I took her to doctor appointments, arranged for meals on wheels, set up in-home nursing care, etc etc etc.

When she died, her daughter (my husband's sister who refused to help in any way because it cramped her lifestyle) called to say she wanted to come over and get some items of nostalgic importance. I was at work, but my husband was home. The daughter came over with a truck and cleaned out her mother's bedroom room, taking almost everything except the carpet!!!!! She took the furniture, TV, all the clothing, all the QVC costume jewelry...everything. My husband just let her do it, because there wasn't anything of real value, and to be honest it saved us the hassle of doing the work ourselves.

[Inkpoe]

Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat

I don't understand. Didn't your husband's step-siblings have their own father? Why would they think they were due anything at all?

Yes they have their own father. The only difference is that my husband's father had money and status.



The older two half siblings were always resentful of how my husband and his full blooded brother were "indulged" by their father and felt that since they did their family bit that they should get something out of it. The fact that he gave them the best education money could buy and a lifestyle they otherwise would never enjoy/experience didn't matter. My husband's father comes from Old Money, so when Grandma died and she didn't list them as one of her heirs really rubbed it in that they weren't part of that family. I mean, they were accepted into the family fold... they just didn't get any money out of it.

The youngest half sibling who was born years and years after my husband's father's death felt that she should have a piece because it's "supposed" to be their mother's money (and of course, Mommy would've given her some money).

As to why they feel entitled, my MIL doesn't exactly help. She's the kind of woman who purposely pits her kids against each other and plays all kinds of manipulation, mindf### games. When the oldest two lost their father recently, my MIL started the whole cascade of drama with them and they were trying to suck in the rest of the family. My husband (and his full blooded brother) incidentally became unavailable throughout that whole thing.

[hhwtm]

Yep, don't have a family member (ie sibling) as executor. There is just no way to prevent a conflict of interest.